Quote of the Month - March

A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the SpoilerTV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.

Abbott Elementary (Sandi) 

1. Janine “There’s no need to feel bad. Even without, you know, what happened, something wasn’t quite clicking with Maurice. I mean, if it was, I wouldn’t have, kissed you, right?” Gregory “Right” Janine “I’m going to go to bone town with Mo. And then, I’m going to break up with him” Gregory “Wow. Okay. Well, that feels like too much information, and also kinda cruel” Janine “I know, but I figured if I gotta do this, I might as well be full of meat and covered in sauce” Gregory [pause] “Oh, you mean the barbeque restaurant!” 

2. Gregory “Do you think the hat looks bad?” Janine “Oh, uh, me? Um, I wouldn’t say it was bad. Like, I think it’s just different, like something you’d wear in “Indiana...Jones and the Temple of Bad Hats”

The Big Door Prize (Sandi) 

1. Cass “Listen to me. People are gonna think that you can’t do this...” Jacob “Oh, I know I can’t do this” Cass “You’ve got this. Okay. You got it” Dusty “Where did that come from?” Cass “I don’t know. I was just feeling myself. Go, Jacob!”

Chicago PD (Lexi F) 

1. Kim Burgess: "Let's go see our daughter." 

2. Adam Ruzek: "Maybe there were some times where maybe I felt more, wanted more. And, uh, you know, she didn't feel the same way, want the same things. But you adjust, I adjusted, we adjusted and worked through it." Kim Burgess: "I-I-I-I haven't ever not felt... It's not that I didn't feel the same way that he did. I did. I, um, I always have."

The Conners 

1. Dan “Yep, the rest of her life will be spent with only me” Louise “Geez Dan, you make it sound like a life sentence” Dan “You’ve seen how I eat. How long could it be?” 

2. Jackie “So, we gotta hit the road. The place is open for five more hours. We got a two hour drive. So, I just gotta put the pedal to the metal” Dan “Alright” Jackie “Oh, my god. That’s exactly what I said before the accident. The, uh, state trooper told me that he’d never seen a semi that cleanly split in half before...”

Daisy Jones and the Six (Sandi) 

1. Daisy “I had the number one song in the country, and I just wanted them to know about it” Billy “But they weren't there?” Daisy “No. They'd moved away” Billy “What? They moved away without telling you. Jesus, Daisy. That might be the saddest thing I ever heard” Daisy “Well, Billy, I hate to tell you this, but life's full of sad things. And when I feel sad, I take pills. What do you do?” Billy “I don't know. I mean, that's...that's what I used to do, but I guess I just feel it” Daisy “Ooh. That’s the saddest thing I ever heard” 

2. Daisy “Let me hear it if you're in love tonight. I've been in love. And it hurts, doesn't it? But it doesn't have to. Love doesn't have to be bombs and tears and blood. Love can be peace. And it can be beautiful. And if you're lucky enough to find somebody who lifts you up even when you don't deserve it that's where the light is. So, my wish for you tonight, ladies and gentlemen, is, find someone who helps you see the light. This is a love song”

The Equalizer (Prpleight) 

1. Harry: “When I was a kid, growing up Jewish, they instill all this fear in you, you know. Like "You're white until they find out you're Jewish", "Don't wear a Star of David out in public" You know? And I, I didn't pay any attention to it, right? I didn't figure it was gonna apply to us, to our generation.” Dante: “Yeah. Found that out the hard way up in Gatling County.”

Ghosts (Sandi) 

1. Pete “Sam got another electronic family news letter from daughter, Laura. And if you recall, the last one ended on a cliffhanger, as my grandson, little Pete, was being fitted for a retainer” Isaac “Speaking of dentistry, a lot of people think that George Washington’s teeth were wooden. But it was actually just his personality. He was boring, but tall” 

2. Hetty “You should've thought of that before you traded your soul to save some snot-nosed urchin” Isaac “Eh, she was never much of a little kid person” Hetty “Well, that's nonsense, I employed hundreds of them” 

3. Hetty “Enjoy the library, Nigel. There’s a chessboard down there. You may want to study it. Because I just checkmated you” Nigel “Yes, I understood. Thank you”

Gotham Knights (Sandi) 

1. Harper “I care what happens to you” Cullen “And if that were true you wouldn’t be asking me to run” Harper “Cullen, what?” Cullen “I want to stay and clear my name not only because, you know, I chose the damn thing, but because it’s finally my choice. You want to go with her? Go. I’m staying for Turner and Carrie. And for me”

Kin (Sandi) 

1. Frank “You know, I’d have more respect for her if she just...if she was straight up and told us the truth. Come on, I just want to hear you fucking say it.” Amanda “You fucking lied, Frank. When Jamie was murdered, you knew that Viking had caused it. But you lied, and you tried to buy us all off with Eamon’s money. To have an easy life. So as far I’m concerned, whatever happened to you, you had it coming.”
2. Bren “His name is Glen Wright. That’s the lad that shot Jamie. Now, we can’t let that so unanswered. You know that, don’t you, Anthony?” Anthony “Yeah” Bren “So, I could pay someone to do that for us. But that’d be wrong, ‘cause Jamie is family. And you would resent me for not giving you the chance to do what’s right” Anthony “I want to do it” Bren “Of course you do. ‘Cause you’ve my fucking blood in ya. You want to know how you go about doing something like this? Don’t think of it as, like, some fucking awful job you have to do. Enjoy it. That is the **** that killed your brother. So enjoy the look of fear on his face when he sees you coming towards him and he realises what’s gonna happen. Enjoy it. Enjoy plugging him and watching him fucking die. Enjoy every bit of it”



The Last of Us (Sandi) 

1. Joel: “It’s okay, baby girl. I got you”



Lopez vs Lopez (Sandi) 

1. Quintin “Yeah, it’s important to have a good work, life balance” George “You barely work, and you have no life! You guys aren’t Gen Z, you guys are Gen Lazy!”



The Mandalorian (Sandi) 

1. Greef: “Be careful, my friend. They’ve got you outnumbered ten to one” Din Djarin “I like those odds” Greef “I bet you do”

A Million Little Things (Sandi) 

1. Greta “Are we too late?” Eddie “I’m pretty sure we heard a baby crying a little while ago” Katherine “And you’re positive it was a baby, not Gary?” Rome “Oh yeah. We’ve spent enough time in this hallway to know what Gary bawling sounds like. This is a new person noise”

Quantum Leap (Sandi) 

1. Jenn “Well, I'm not sure what to say either. I'm terrible at speeches. It does remind me of a story about drowning bunnies. No, hang on. It's just one bunny. There's a boy, and he sees a bunny. And he saves a bunny from the river. But then the next day, he sees another bunny. But he saves that bunny too, and then another, and another. I'm going somewhere with this. I promise. So the boy learns that there's a farmer upstream who's throwing bunnies in the river after he learns that they're eating his crops. So what's the answer?” Ben “Is this a story or a brainteaser?” Jenn “A story. If he goes upstream to see if the farmer will change his ways, then the bunnies in the river will all drown. See? There is no right answer.” Ben “Is that the end of your story?” Jenn “Yeah” Ben “OK. I...I don't get it” Jenn “The answer is you, Ben, because you are doing both, leap after leap, saving bunnies from the river, but you're also running upstream trying to change what will happen in the future. You're doing both, and it...it's exhausting. But the fact that you can do both is what makes you all the more a hero. You just gotta trust that there's a way out of this. I know you'll be the one to find it”

Shrinking (Sandi) 

1. Jimmy “We’re terrible people” Gaby “Oh, man, we’re are some dirty slut pigs. Um, so, uh, what are you thinking?” Jimmy “I’m thinking, “What would Tia think?”” Gaby “Well, you know, she didn’t like when I borrowed your gardener, so she sure as fuck is not gonna like when I borrowed your dick” Jimmy “You didn’t exactly borrow it there, Gaby, I was handing it out like someone gives away candy at Halloween” Gaby “You start giving away dicks at Halloween, you’re gonna get arrested” 

2. Paul “Hire her. She's a brilliant therapist” Gerald “Paul, I've already told her she's got the job” Paul “Ooh. Well then, read your emails, 'cause I'm gonna finish this. She's the most empathetic clinician I've ever crossed paths with, which is why her patients love her so much. And [SIGHS] I do not tell her often enough how much I value her as a as a colleague. Because apparently, I'm not good with the women I care about” Gaby “No, not at all” Paul “But I'm working on it. And I plan to have it down by the time I'm 140. And I will live till then, because I drink a lot of water” Gerald “Are you about done?” Paul “Give me your car keys. You're my ride home. I'll wait in the car” 3. Jimmy “I also guilted him for being a selfish son of a bitch, so...” Gaby “Yeah, that’s what it is” Liz “Yeah, that makes sense” Brian “I still don’t love these two as friends” Gaby “And we don’t give a shit” Liz “It makes us stronger” Gaby & Liz together “Yeah. Mm-hmm” ~~~Disclaimer – I also love that these two characters have become such firm friends, though I can see a huge blow up between the two at some point in the near future. But I also think that they will eventually walk themselves through whatever it is that they clash over, and end up making each other all the more stronger for it, which is why I like this exchange.

So Help Me Todd (Sandi) 

1. Ava “I’m starving. When’s lunch? Are we gonna be staying in your sister’s garage the entire time? Because that would be so tragic. I don’t really eat meat, unless it’s bacon, but...I could make an exception, but you should really watch those dark web videos about how hamburgers are made. So intense. You look kind of pale. Are you okay? Is it the murder hamburgers? You don’t really have to watch it. It’s just interesting because cows are my favourite kind of farm anim...”

Son of a Critch (Sandi) 1. Young Mark “Uh, I’ve decided I’m a vegetarian, so...” Mary “This is all her doing, isn’t it? Oh, too good for a little meat fried up in the pan! Yeah, bet she can’t eat anything, with her fancy protestant nose all stuck up in the air!” [Piles mashed potato & gravy onto his plate] Young Mark “I..mom!” Mary “Jesus Christ, there’s no meat in gravy!” 2. Pop “You know, if there’s one thing that being old teaches you, it’s that you live every day as if it was your last. And eventually, you’ll be right”

Star Trek: Picard (Sandi) 

1. Beverly “Will, did you just throw an asteroid?” Will “Goddamn right I did” 

2. Will “You know, we have saved the galaxy more than a few times” Jean-Luc “And hopefully they’ll remember” Shaw “Or, they might remember that time that someone hot-dropped the saucer section of the Enterprise-D on a planet. Or, that time that someone threw the Prime Directive out the window so they could snog a villager on Ba’ku. Or, the time that you boys nearly wiped out all of humanity by creating a time paradox in the Devron system. Basically, when it comes to rescues from danger you two have a real ‘chicken and egg’ thing happening” Jean-Luc “Those were the days” 

3. Jean-Luc “Ro, don’t do this” Ro “I’m giving you what you gave me all those years ago. A fighting chance” Jean-Luc “Ro, I...I do see you. Everything. Forgive me. It’s only now.”

Ted Lasso (Folie-lex) 

1. Roy: “Oy, what the f*ck's a Hallmark Christmas movie?” Ted: “Hey look man, I don't know what your beef is with Trent, but Imma need you to order off the vegan menu right now and squash it. 'Cause your ego is about to sabotage a lot more than a silly football match. You feel me? [Roy nods] Thank you. And Hallmark Christmas movies are films that feature women from the big city falling in love with their childhood crushes. It's usually some fella who owns a Christmas tree farm. Sometime he's also a Santa Clause or a prince. They suck, but they're great. But they also mostly suck. But they're also kinda great. They're good with the sound off. Now go fix this, please.”

True Lies (Prpleight) 

1. Wolf: “Do you think I'm gonna kill you?” Harry: “Maybe.” Wolf: “Did I think about it? Yeah. But then Helen said this really nice thing about seeds and then I was like, oh, whatever, never mind. I'm not gonna do it.” Harry: “Seeds?” Wolf: “Yeah. You're a very lucky man. Now let's do this. Besides, if I wanted to kill you, you'd never see it coming.” (Harry moves on into position.) Wolf: “Pew. Pew.” 

2. Helen: “And we want to support you in taking responsibility for your dreams. So, you can start paying for your own lessons and equipment.” Dana: “What are you guys saying?” Harry: “We're saying we love you. We're saying we believe in you.” Helen: “And we're saying that Baskin Robbins is hiring.”



Wolf Pack (Prpleight) 

1. Harlen: “This was a really bad idea.” Blake: “Have we had a good one yet?”

Young Sheldon (Sandi) 

1. Sheldon “What are you doing out here?” Georgie “I heard Mandy was having the baby” Sheldon “Yes, but that happens inside” Georgie “I know” Sheldon “Aren’t you going in?” Georgie “I can’t” Sheldon “Oh, these doors are automated. You just walk towards them and they open”

What We’re Watching 

Bones (Dahne) 

1.  Aubrey: “I do not get you, you know that. All of the evidence points to Zack. Even he can’t deny it, but now you don’t think that he did it.” Booth: “Look, it doesn’t matter. It’s just a gut feeling. That’s all.” Aubrey: “Well, maybe your gut needs a probiotic.”

Doctor Who (Sandi) 

1. Brigadier “What's all that about?” Liz “Another telepathic conference, I think” Brigadier “That old chap?” Liz “'Fraid so!” Brigadier “Three of 'em! I didn't know when I was well off!” 

2. Brigadier “Wonderful chap. Both of them”



Scorpion (Prpleight)  

1. Paige: “Bring enough hand sanitizer?” Sylvester: “We came here to examine dung. So, to answer your question. No.”

Two Guys and a Girl (Sandi) 

1. Irene “You want me!” Pete “Okay. Yeah, you’re right, Irene. All these years of snubbing you have been an elaborate ruse to get you in bed, tonight” Irene “Wow, this is bordering on obsession. Don’t make me get a restraining order” Pete “You can have mine. Just reverse the names” 

2. Sharon “Talking to lonely truckers again?” Pete “No. I wanna go to where the fires are, you know. Gain experience up close” Berg “Okay, I’ll shove your head in the oven, you keep your eyes open” 

3. Sharon “Why are you in such a good mood?” Berg “Because tonight, I have a chance to prove to Irene that she was wrong about me. All I need is a great dress” Sharon “Oh, you know, Berg, with your shape you really should wear pants” Berg “No. It’s for Irene...unless I find something really sexy”