A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.
1. Adam Ruzek: "Also, never eat my food. Not ever." (Lexi Fanty)
1. Jackie [to a very stoned Dan]: “You’re gonna sit down on the couch right here, and everything’s gonna be fine.” Dan: “I can’t walk. My feet are on the wrong feet.” Jackie: “You mean they’re not your feet?” Dan: “No. What’s wrong with you? Of course they’re my feet! They’re on the wrong legs! They don’t want to walk together!”
2. Harris: “I spent my whole day going door-to-door to get people to sign a petition to recall this guy.” Jackie: “Yeah, good for you. You get in people’s faces! Make ‘em uncomfortable.” Harris: “Well, we need more volunteers. You wanna help?” Jackie: “Uh, me? No. I don’t believe in bothering people at home.” Harris: “And yet, here you are.” (Sandi)
1. Bode: "We can't just leave her stranded man. What if some bad dude comes along?" Freddy: "We are the bad dudes, bro." (Lexi Fanty)
Ghosts -
1. Thor: “So, from your tree will blossom many new trees. And your tree of friendship with Shiki will now be a whole area of friendship.” Trevor: “Sort of a friend zone, is what you’re saying?”
1. Thor: “So, from your tree will blossom many new trees. And your tree of friendship with Shiki will now be a whole area of friendship.” Trevor: “Sort of a friend zone, is what you’re saying?”
2. Sam: “Spirits, we ask you to open your doors to the realm of the dead.” Pete: “I can’t believe some people think this stuff is real.” Alberta: “Pete, you’re a ghost.” Pete: “That’s a fair point.” (Sandi)
1. Maghra: “My name is Maghra.” Baba: “Maghra? What kind of name is Maghra?” Maghra: “What kind of name is Baba?” Baba: “That’s fair point, Maghra.” (Elvis)
2. Baba: “Damn it Ranger. If anything happens to you, Lu will hunt me down and kill me in my sleep.” Ranger “No. She will wake you first, so that you feel it when it happens.”
3. Ranger: “Where you headed?” Baba: “I’m gonna hunt down that demon queen and cut out her heart.” Ranger “Aw, sounds like a terrible idea. Can I come?” (Sandi)
1. Jennifer Walters: "And when are we getting the X-Man? K.E.V.I.N: "I cannot tell you that."
2. Jennifer: "I smash fourth walls and bad evenings. And sometimes, Matt Murdock."
3. K.E.V.I.N: "I will answer your questions, but you must transform back to Jennifer." Jennifer: "Why?" K.E.V.I.N: "You are very expensive. The visual effects team has moved on to another project." (Elvis)
1. Todd: “And that is what we call..” Todd & Margaret: “...a sting.” Chuck: “...an ambush." [everyone looks at him] “A sting. I-I was gonna say sting.” [Todd & Margaret are already ignoring him, turn and high five] Allison: “You two have been spending way too much time together.” (Sandi)
1. Steve [points the rifle]: “Close your eyes.” Danny: “No." [looks at stars] "I want to see. Look at it. It’s wonderful.”
2. Danny: “They’re aren’t any, are there. Any monsters?” Steve: “There’s one. I think.” (Sandi)
1. Vic: “Jack, it is not gonna feel this way forever, unless you let it kill you… don’t [let it kill you]." (After the team frees Jack from being cuffed to the bed under a tree. - Rianne Demmers)
1. Ezekiel: “This world is broken, but we don’t have to be.” (Sandi)
1. Albie: “No girl should have to be exposed to an old guy’s junk.” Bert: “It’s not like it was ever so beautiful to look at anyway. I mean, it’s a penis. It’s not a sunset.” (Sandi)
What We're Watching
1. Louis: "But I wasn't a man anymore. I was something else. I had powers now and decades of rage to process. And it was both random and unfortunate the man picked that night to dabble in fuckery." (Louis perfectly describes what a Black vampire in the early 20th century would be feeling when confronted with a racist. - Naomi Anna)
