A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.
1. Charles: "The name of the game is called 'Who Knows Mo', Friend Or Foe, Are You Fo' Real Or Just Fo' Show?'" Jake: "Little wordy."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine - 8.06
1. Holt: "Attention, everyone. A bomb was just found on a bus in downtown Brooklyn." Jake: "Oh my God, a bomb on a bus. It's a 'Speed'? I get to work a 'Speed'?" Holt: "That sentence is nonsensical. One can work with speed, but one certainly cannot work a speed." Jake: " Speed is a movie. I won't let you ruin this!"
2. O'Sullivan: "Oh, there she is. My arch-nemesis." Amy: "You're a cop O'Sullivan. Shouldn't your arch-nemesis be a criminal?" O'Sullivan: "No."
3. Jake: "Oh, I've never seen this face before. Wait... is that...?" Holt: "Yes, he's made me huffy. Do you know what happens when you refuse to punish cops for their mistakes? When police are treated as a separate class of citizen above the law? It breeds a lack of trust in the community, and that lack of trust means people won't help us with our investigations or testify or even call us when they're in danger. It makes them more scared of us than of criminals and gangsters. It makes them run when we approach, even though they've done nothing wrong. It makes the people see us as the enemy, which leads to more confrontation, more distrust. You wonder how Peralta can do his job when he's held accountable for his actions? I wonder how any of us can do our job if he's not." (Folie-lex)
1. Elieen: "You should change the name of this island from Fantasy Island to Nightmare Hellscape Island."
2. Ruby: "Oh, well, look, you can't change the past, right? So if you screwed up then, be there for her now, because when it comes to being a parent, I mean, you can't stop trying. Even when your child slams the door in your face it's your job to keep knocking." (Prpleight and Folie-lex)
1. Boimler: "They don't like when people ask how thet came back, man. It's probably just a transporter pattern buffer thing." Mariner: "Yeah, or a restored katra, or a mirror universe switcheroo, or the Borg rebuilt him." Boimler: "Or he could be a future son from an alternate timeline, or maybe he got Genesis Deviced, or time ribboned." Mariner: "Or he was trapped in the Nexus." Boimler: "Nexus. Time ribbon. Same thing."
2. Mariner: "So weird we haven't teamed up before now. Sort of like a glaring omission." Tendi: "You always get paired with Boimler, and I'm always with Rutherford. We should switch it up more often." (Folie-lex)
1. Supergirl [to Alex]: "I don't think I ever want to hear the word Phantom again, not in an opera, not in a Star Wars prequel, especially not in a Star Wars prequel, I don't even think I could handle an episode of Scooby-Doo right now."
2. Supergirl: “Alex?” Alex:”Yeah?” Supergirl: “Can I have another hug please?” Alex: “Always.”
3. Kara: "What if that fear never goes away?" Alex: "When I thought that we couldn't get you back I just wanted to give up, like I couldn't get out of bed, I... and now that we DID get you back I still feel like you could slip away at any moment and I felt that way today, too. And I'm sooo sorry, because all it want to do is shield you form any more pain. I didn't even think the only way out is through, and we're going to get through this together." Kara: "Healing together." (Donna Cromeans)
1. Ted: "Boy, I love meeting people's mums. It's like reading an instruction manual as to why they're nuts." Beard: "LETS GOOOOOOOO!!!" Ted: "How's Mrs. Beard doing by the way?" Beard: "Full-blown QAnon." Ted: "Mmm, yup."
2. Jamie: "I'm trying to build bridges here!" Roy: "You couldn't fucking build Jeff Bridges." Ted: "Hey hey hey! What's going on? What's wrong?" Jamie: "This man refuses to coach me." Roy: "He refuses to stop being an asshole." Ted:" Okay, Roy you're not gonna like this, but right now Jamie here is being the mature one." Jamie: "It's true. I'm being super mature you big, dumb, hairy baby twat."
3. Rebecca: "Higgins, never interfere. It doesn't help and you'll only be punished for it. My parents should've split up years ago. When she first left him what I was at Uni, I congratulated her. Told her she deserved a better life. Two weeks they were back together and she didn't speak to me for nine months. It does no good." (Folie-lex)
1. Scott: "You know what it was like? It was like he strained guacamole through an old gym sock, threw the sock in a blender and we drank the sock."
2. Trent: "The headcase spent too much time in the sandbox and can't hack it stateside." Xavier: "Huh." Trent: "You got something to say?" Xavier: "Yeah. Couple things. First, you were in the National Guard in New Jersey. You don't get to say 'sandbox' unless you mean the Jersey Shore. And second a lot these guys suffer from PTSD." Trent: "What makes you the expert?" Xavier: "Just two tours in Afghanistan while you were guarding saltwater taffy."
3. David: "I wanted to crack his last case. But it's been so long since I was a cop and he was my partner." Laura: "It's okay, David. We'll figure this out. We'll figure this out together." (Folie-lex)
1. Gage [about Negan]: “He’s a dick, but he makes sense.” (KathM)
What We're Watching
1. Provenza: "You know why I hate porn? Guy delivers pizza, it never gets eaten. Girl's refrigerator breaks, it never gets fixed." (Prpleight)
1. Ava: "I'm not gonna go write knock-knock jokes about how men don't put the toilet seat down. I'm not that desperate."
Jimmy: "Respectfully, as your manager, right now you are that desperate."
2. Deborah: "Sending your son to the woods with a bunch of other horny, gay teens. The only thing you're gonna convert him to is from a top to a bottom." Ava: "...O...okay?" Deborah: "Now that's a better joke!" Ava: "Oh my God. That's why you almost just killed me?" (Folie-lex)
1. Ray: "Those are not symptoms. Those are feelings. Mick, I think you're developing a crush." Mick: "Is that when you whizz and it hurts?" (Prpleight)
1. Amanda: "I get scared of the future. And so sometimes I just go into the past when I was a kid. When life wasn't so goddamn complicated." (Elvis)
