Vampires love virgins, and the City Council episode opens with Guillermo taking the roommates to a LARP gathering where they can observe their favorite food in the flesh. LARPing, as every viewer should know, stands for Live Action Role Playing, but if you forgot Jenna is there to remind you. Again.
The vampires observe Jenna being treated unfairly by her teammates and Nadja especially finds it bothersome.
“Be strong, sweet little one. Some day they will all be dead and you will do a shit on all of their graves.”
That feels oddly specific, Nadja…
The addition of the Baron in the house has made things challenging. Nandor’s use of that word suggests he’s being rather flippant in his feelings about this new addition and the higher expectations that have come with it.
There’s confusion as to what exactly the Baron wants them to conquer. Is it North America? The “New world”? Or just Staten Island? If it’s all of North America, that includes Canada, which has a very active trade in beaver pelts – oh no, sorry, that was hundreds of years ago. Luckily Colin Robinson is eavesdropping behind the curtain of the fancy room and has suggestions.
As a viewer I can feel Colin sucking my energy.
Via the bus, because Colin couldn’t be more banal if he tried, he takes the group to the Staten Island Borough Council’s Monthly Zoning Ordinance Meeting. Where they can talk to “the leaders” and begin the process of taking over the….? Well, they’ll start with Staten Island and go from there.
No nuns. No nuns. None.
Colin does a quick mega feed (thanks to his thoughts on zoning, which are as dull and redundant as you can imagine). The scenes cut to the housemates letting us know their plans for total domination. This includes: a ban on noise during daylight hours; all crucifixes in churches to be burned; a ban on turtlenecks; and nun-free zones.
Nandor fails at his turn at the council meeting, unable to sway the council or even actually get his point across. While the housemates plan their next move, Nadja finds Jenna wandering alone at night. Nadja remembers “how it feels to be powerless and disrespected” and so she has a little chat with Jenna about how things could change. They’re not quite on the same wave length, but ultimately Nadja bites Jenna and then shares some of her own blood with her. And so Jenna’s transformation begins.
Laszlo heads off to the home of councilwoman Barbara Lazarro and while he tries to be charming he just comes across as inappropriate and oddly out of time. He asks if she has someone she needs taken care of, but instead of straight out asking who he can kill for her he asks it in such a way she replies with, “I mean the raccoon population is out of control. Saw three of them in my garbage can this morning. Three.”
It gives Laszlo something to work with. He charms the local raccoons and then leaves a pile of dead raccoon bodies on Barbara’s front porch. Instead of making any connection to her earlier words she instead sees this as a threat.
Nandor chooses to go a different route and hypnotize one of the younger councilmen. If Doug Peterson destroys Lazarro then Nandor destroys Peterson and the council is all his. So he calls out through the ether to Doug… Peters… Peterston? He checks his cheat sheet and even after reading “Peterson” it takes a bit for the name to stick because Nandor is blessedly unburdened by the complications of a University education.
We get to see Doug under the control of Nandor, unleashed in a council meeting, and while he sounds like nothing more than a raving lunatic the energy in the room is at least a big turn on for Colin Robertson.
Gross.
Being supernatural doesn’t protect you from frustrating housemates, boring meetings, or riding the bus (although there is the option to BAT! yourself out of there and ride on the roof), but the banality of life wasn't the problem with this episode. The problem this week was it felt like the audience wasn't allowed as much time to appreciate the jokes. A lot happens in the episode, perhaps too much, and some of the jokes fall a bit flat, but the fun hasn’t been sucked dry and I’m already too invested in the lives of these vampires that I’ll stick around to find out whose turn it is to do the dishes next.
