After a two-year wait, I can't believe this season is almost over and there's only one episode left. It has been excellent though, but I definitely need to rewatch it after the season (series?) finale airs next week. Phoebe Waller Bridge has mentioned in an interview that she won't do another season for a long while, (at least until she turns 50!) and while I'm excited for all her other projects, I'm disappointed we won't see more of Fleabag's adventures in the near future. This week's episode was, as usual, a delight.
Fleeing Fleabag
After she almost hooked up with The Priest last week (the only reason it didn't quite happen being the untimely fall of that sacred painting), things were bound to be awkward considering the look on The Priest's face as he realized what he'd (almost) done. Fleabag, however, wasn't about to let this kind of small setback get her down, and drinks with Claire's lawyer friend led to unexpectedly good sex (he really is that good). I honestly wasn't expecting that since she seemed pretty taken with The Priest, but the Lawyer was quite insistant and funny and what's a girl to do, you know? So go Fleabag tbh, get it! I'm assuming that martini wasn't her first (or last) considering in what state she appears the next day for a wedding meeting at Godmother's & Dad's place.
I'm not sure what the meeting was supposed to be about (how much is there to say to the officiating priest beforehand anyway?) or why gigantic bouquets were involved, but it also apparently included "chocolatey things" according to Dad. I would've liked more details about this (hopefully not his usual little canapes), because British biscuits are my jam (ha) right now and I want to try them ALL. Well, not all, but I'm a huge Digestives fan (weirdly, the French ones don't taste the same as the UK ones?! But we don't have the dark chocolate kind anymore so clearly we are inferior in that way) and I really want to try Hobnobs, Toaster Strudels, everything. Anyway, enough about my biscuit cravings, but having read the Georgia Nicolson books I've always wanted to sample what she talked about, Jammy Dodgers included.
All goes to hell when The Priest announces that alas, he won't be able to do the wedding. Everyone -minus Fleabag- is a bit stunned, especially after he comes up with a half-assed excuse about his brother being ill because of "a lorry accident". Dude, please, lie better next time! Say you have an impromptu trip to Rome for a dress fitting, or you're volunteering to help build houses somewhere and construction waits for no man.
Have I mentioned how much I enjoy seeing Olivia Coleman pretend to be nice while actually being a harpie every week? Because I do, she's fantastic and there's never enough. This week especially, I'm still cracking up while recalling how she first pretended to support The Priest "Of course you must go, you poor, poor man. Family first!" before ripping him a new one once he'd left, full crazy style "WHAT A CUNT, WHAT. A. CUNT.", with Dad quietly encouraging Fleabag and Claire to take off. Probably safer, who knows what would've happened if they'd stayed in the line of fire. Claire is also not on board with the wedding (at this point, who is? Neither Dad nor Godmother seemed that particularly enthused with each other at the engagement dinner, but I do want it to happen if only to see everything implode), and asks Fleabag to stop it. Fleabag does enjoy a challenge, and seducing the priest is quite a good start already.
"You can't just cancel a wedding. You have the dress!"Considering my theories about what Godmother will wear, or rather not wear, at said wedding, The Priest may well be the only one in a dress on the actual day.
Crazy Claire
After Chatty Wednesdays, meet Quiet Tuesdays at the café. Much more my cup of tea, honestly, but I do wonder what the other days bring. Bring Your Own Pet Mondays? Grab-bag Thursdays? Of all the characters to come back, I was not expecting the creepy bank manager to make an appearance, even less to inform Fleabag he'd found a new job, and I certainly would never have pictured him helping out at the café while sporting Fleabag's guinea pig apron, OR TAKING OFF WITH IT. It's a cute apron though, I get it. If I ever cooked/served food I'd enjoy wearing it too.
Now, when Fleabag took Claire's call by describing her as "a bit mental" in order to get out of the conversation with the bank manager, I thought she was being a little unfair. Having seen the cause of the crisis leading to the distraught call however, I'll admit mental is pretty fitting. Claire got a spur of the moment, my husband is a douche, hair cut and it does not look good. To be fair, once you get used to it you can kind of picture what it could have looked like with a different hair texture or if it weren't asymmetrical, or... Truth be told, while it turns out Claire did indeed ask for this exact haircut (the pic of the model is identical), hair dressers taking wild liberties with what you've asked for and ruining your life by giving you a horrendous haircut that'll take months to grow out is something that happens more often than it should. It's like a challenge for some of them, they have way too much power. And when it's done, and you're sobbing inside thinking of how on earth you're going to go into work/school on the next day looking like that, you still have to pretend you're absolutely delighted with your new "edgy" look and hold in the tears until you get home and get rid of all the mousse that's holding up the haphazard strands around your head. Been there, done that. It's crazy that even when you give a simple instruction like "just the tips" you still end up with four inches just chopped off, no going back.
/rant over/
"Hair IS everything."
Klare saves Claire's day by showing up and complimenting her, and they take off. "Bye Claire" sounded a little like "Bye Felicia" the third time around, I may use it now.
Nine Times
As Fleabag awaits the really-good-at-sex Lawyer in nothing but a coat and, apparently, coconut oil, she finds The Priest at her door instead. He's visibly quite distraught, if his answers are anything to go by.
"Water?"
"No thanks, I want to keep a clear head."
Says the man downing gin at any time of day. He's come to his senses about the wedding though, and is back in. Mostly because the dress is taylor-made and won't fit anyone else, according to him (please, those things seem loose enough to fit anyone). The Lawyer interrupts this revelation however, until Fleabag gets rid of him by saying he is indeed incredible at sex, and made her come nine times.
The Priest will also marvel at this fact, while I marvel at the fact that 1. He isn't jealous 2. He didn't expect Fleabag to be exclusive 3. Admits he'd fall in love with her if they had sex and "his life would be fucked" because he's only supposed to love God. Fair enough, but they still end up having sex and their chemistry is truly something to behold.
So fam, were you glad they finally got together? Do you think it's wrong? Has anyone ruined your hairstyle while you thanked them profusely for effectively ending any kind of social life you had?
I can't wait to see what the finale has in store for us!
