“Self-Portrait” forces the “Claws” crew to take a long, hard look at themselves and try to figure out what they want out of life.
As the episode begins, Desna says that she was able to sleep soundly for the first time since Roller’s death and, indeed, things seem to finally be looking up for her. The Coombs are gone (she’s a little upset they were murdered instead of arrested, but Dean’s relief upon hearing the news is all the reassurance she needs), the book on Roller’s murder has been closed, she’s out from under Uncle Daddy’s thumb, and she’s finally gotten her dream salon. But after a verbal clawing match with the salon’s former staff, a retributory act of vandalism causes thousands of dollars in damages. Desna decides to get the cash she needs for the repairs and revenge on the Glint Nails girls by entering Nail-Palm – a nail design competition – and beating the Koreans at their own game.
But casting a pall on things is growing tension between her and BFF Jenn. Uncle Daddy dangles a beautiful house in a safe neighborhood with great school in front of Bryce and Jenn to try and get Bryce to keep working for him. Bryce, on Jenn’s orders, is all ready to turn it down, but Jenn has a moment of weakness where she seems to realize what this would mean for the girls and she lets him accept. Desna is disappointed in this decision and that sparks a series of fights between them, particularly after Jenn (perhaps in a subconscious act of self-harm or self-sabotage) hurts her thumb and is forced to drop out of the competition. And what makes this storyline so interesting is that they’re both right. Desna is correct that officially becoming a Dixie Mafia wife isn’t cause for celebration, and that it’s kinda bullshit that Bryce, like Roller, reaped oversized rewards for his work compared to her. On the other hand, Jenn is spot-on when she accuses Desna of being hypocritical about turning to crime to get ahead when she did the exact same thing, and when she calls Desna out on being jealous that Jenn got the type of house she has long promised to Dean.
It all seems to be squashed when Jenn’s pep talk from the sidelines when she freezes during the final round pushes Desna to win the competition and the cash. But the cliffhanger this week is Jenn accidentally finding out about Desna’s connection to the Coombs from a piece of art Dean made. And I don’t think she’s too happy to realize that her best friend set her husband up to commit murder.
Also causing problems, per usual, is Virginia. Her confidence that she’s fully in Desna’s crew takes a hit when she’s made an alternate for the competition (Quiet Ann, we learn, can do nails, although, as she says, she’s “better with legs”). This leaves Virginia susceptible to an offer from her roommate Relevance to make easy money dancing in silly costumes on a webcam. But when it turns out to be a sex scene and her co-star refuses to let her back out, she’s forced to call Desna for help (and, awesomely, the rescue involves Quiet Ann beating the hell out of the guy with a bat). Desna scolds a sobbing Virginia for putting herself at risk, but then – without telling her that Jenn’s hurt – bucks her up by saying that she’ll be competing for them the next day.
Lots of romance subplots this week too. Desna has a meet-cute with Gregory (Jimmy Jean-Louis, a.k.a. the Haitian from “Heroes”), a doctor who is basically the anti-Roller. Their first two dates are interrupted by various dramas, but it’s clear he’s smitten with her and he shows up to congratulate her when she wins Nail-Palm. Quiet Ann, meanwhile, has started an affair with that female police officer, but when it’s rumbled by her friends, they strongly advise her not to get involved with a cop. And they appear to be right as it seems her paramour is investigating Uncle Daddy. Finally, a love connection might be brewing between Polly and Dr. Ken after a conversation about stress (“You were nearly murdered by a co-worker; that would take its toll on anybody!”) leads to a slap that he finds more of a turn-on than therapeutic.
Not at all sexy is Roller’s ordeal in the swamp, as he’s repeatedly raped by a crazy artist who makes sculptures out of pubic hair, fancies him an English suitor, and uses a shock collar to control his actions. Being the player that he is, Roller quickly cottons on to how to manipulate her, but he’s still foiled before he can complete a call to Uncle Daddy. I know it’s too soon to throw Roller back into the hornet’s nest that is Palmetto, but I really hope the show doesn’t drag this gross weirdness (or weird grossness) out too long.
Now that I’ve nailed my review of this week’s “Claws,” come share your thoughts on “Self-Portrait” in the comments section.
