Poor Tina. It is the law of the procedural universe that she will never truly be Jimmy Jr.’s girlfriend. Just like Charlie Brown and the football, Tina is destined to try and fail over and over for our entertainment. Any episode that centers on her major Jimmy Jr. crush is usually bound to end in heartbreak (at least for me, I just want those crazy kids to work it out).
That’s the problem long-running shows, especially cartoons, face. Everything needs to go to back to status quo at the end of the episode. Few cartoons (Venture Bros. and Archer spring to mind) buck that trend, but often cartoon characters are stuck in a static universe. New characters may be gradually added, but the show won’t allow any major life changes. Tina will always be pining for Jimmy Jr. Despite the end of tonight’s episode, I have no doubt Tina will be back to pining by the start of the next one.
Luckily, the brilliant writers on Bob’s Burgers can take an old plotline and give it new life. The life in this case comes in the form of a robot.
Tina’s walking tall at the beginning of “Ex Mach Tina”. Literally. She’s bought new platform beach espadrilles to impress Jimmy Jr. Tina’s decided that the problem with Jimmy Jr. is that she’s not close enough to his face when she’s talking to him. She wants to change that in time for the beach bonfire. Unfortunately, Jimmy Jr. doesn’t care (while Zeke has a very specific idea of what a "bond-fire" entails). Tina, rejected once again, ends up twisting her ankle and getting checked by the incompetent school nurse. The bad news is that she has to use crutches. The good news is that she gets to be the guinea pig for Wagstaff’s new RUMP (Robotic Mobility Pilot Program).
Enter the robot.
Tina now gets to stay in the comfort of her own room and navigate a robot through the halls of the school. Tina’s a little uncertain about the whole endeavor, until Jimmy Jr. starts deeply connecting with the robot.
When Tina’s accidentally trapped in AV closet, she meets up with Jimmy Jr., who’s chosen the closet for a daddy issues freakout. The two actually connect without the requisite awkwardness. Jimmy Jr. feels like he can open up to the Tina-Bot about anything and Tina pretends to like his musoems (don’t call them songs). Through their conversations, Tina comes to realize that Jimmy Jr. is kind of oblivious, but it still breaks her heart when Jimmy Jr. asks the robot and not Tina to the bonfire.
At this point, Linda’s getting worried. Tina refuses to leave her room and is contemplating twisting her other ankle to keep this “wackadoo” scheme going. Tina refuses to listen to her well-meaning mother and instead turns to her siblings for help.
Tina-Bot has been leading a secret life. It goes to school as Tina during the day and pulls pranks all night. All Louise and Gene had to do was steal the control system from Tina’s room and convince security guard Yuli that it is his robot supervisor. Louise and Gene use their new robot manipulation abilities to help Tina sneak the robot out of the school, but accidentally run into Yuli. Louise manages to make Yuli think that Tina-Bot has been tragically fired from its job. Yuli is immediately supportive and helps get the robot out of the school, telling it to keep in touch and avoid Philly (deep-cut Hitch-bot joke, there).
Tina’s happy to get to the robot to the beach, but becomes uncomfortable with Jimmy Jr.’s clear preference for the robot over her. It also makes her deeply uncomfortable that her entire family is there to see it. Linda tries to reassure her daughter before finally giving up, “This is the first time this has ever happened to anyone.” The Belcher family is in uncharted waters.
Tina decides to stand up for herself and runs (as fast as her crutches will take her) to the beach. Her appearance rescues Jimmy Jr. from totally choking over his “musoem” reading. Jimmy Jr. gains the confidence to complete his reading and the two decide that it’s better to be real, even if it is awkward. It’s very sweet moment, but certainly not a banjo moment.
A banjo moment is the target of Bob’s quest throughout the episode. After taking some clothes to a thrift store (that he got them from in the first place), Bob returns with a banjo. Normally enthusiastic Linda can’t get excited over the instrument. Although Bob has fantasies about revealing himself to be a banjo prodigy, he can’t play a song to save his life. Even at the end, when he attempts to backup Jimmy Jr. (“watch me for the changes!”), he’s met with a general apathy by the Wagstaff students, which is at least better than open derision.
In the end, Tina and Jimmy Jr. have to deal with the reality of their relationship, mostly because Zeke threw the robot into the sea (it was nothing personal, he just doesn’t trust bots). Will the two be together by next episode, or will poor Tina be doomed to pine forever? We’ll have to find out!
What did you think of “Ex Mach Tina”? Let me know in the comments!
