Devious Maids - Sweeping with the Enemy - Review: "Dreams and Nightmare Dates"

Hello all! I’ll be filling in for Gavin on Devious Maids for the next two episodes. Now let's get this show on the road!

Carmen:

Do the "previously on"s seem to be getting longer? I say this only means the story is getting juicier, and its proven right away, as the episode opens on Jesse and Danni hooking up. Which, while very pretty to look at, I’m wondering how old Danni is?? Okay, this is a soap, I should get over it. So Danni and Jesse are an item now; hopefully he will be a stabilizing influence on her, with his steady job and penchant for investigating murder mysteries in his spare time.

After Carmen called her last week, cousin Josefina shows up to haul Danni back home. Unfortunate timing though, since Danni has just booked her first gig in LA, a showcase that she hopes will land her a manager. Josefina was pretty harsh on her, and more so on Carmen, using her whole life of chasing her dream of being a singer as an example of what not to do. I was almost happy to see her locked away when Carmen decided to help Danni get to her show.

Zoinks!

As conflicted as she was about what’s best for Danni, as she has been this whole time, but it was really touching seeing Carmen react so emotionally during Danni’s performance at the showcase. In Danni, she sees a chance to live her life over again, to make better decisions this time around. I don’t totally disagree with Josefina though; Carmen gave Danni up and doesn’t have a right to be her mother the way Josefina does; she changed all the diapers, read her stories, fed her, clothed her… she raised Daniela, but that doesn’t mean Carmen can’t be in her life, especially now that Danni is an adult. All of this is up in the air though, now that the adopted cat is out of the bag, so who knows what Danni will choose to do next.

Zoila:

The entire Zoila/Kyle/Kyle’s mother triangle has made me uncomfortable from the start, but somehow Zoila’s love life has gotten even more awkward. First thing’s first though, Kyle broke up with her in the most pathetic way imaginable. He went out of town without telling her, then, after he got back, pretended like she should’ve somehow known or checked up on him and the fact that they haven’t talked meant that they were already broken up? He acted like it’s just obvious they were already broken up, which is nuts enough, then her gave her a breakup gift and told her what it was before she even opened it (a scented candle. sigh.)! Double nuts, triple nuts, this is all extremely bonkers.

I wrapped up some disappointment for you!

Against what I imagine is her better judgement, Zoila still hangs out with Kyle’s creepy mom Frances and ends up running into Adrian Powell, of all weirdos, at dinner. She’s certain he’ll blow her secret, but he is simply charmed to meet her, apparently unaware he’s met her countless times before while she was working for Genevieve. Kyle’s creepy mother sets them up on an utter nightmare of a date, and she does express her disgust for him, assuming he didn’t recognize her because he’s a racist. Adrian insists he’s merely a classist, no big deal, and is more charmed by Zoila the more she is repulsed by him.

It's okay, I'm just here to ruin your life.

Adrian walks Zoila to the door after their date, and makes it clear that he is committed to chasing her. He plants a big, unappealing kiss on her, which actually made me yell, “Cochino!!!” at the television, but what’s worse is Kyle and Kyle’s creepy ol’ mother watching on. The first thing that concerns me about this plot is the implausibility. No one is watching Devious Maids for its gritty, realistic, storytelling, but Zoila’s masquerading as a rich person in Beverly Hills, as her boss, no less, is a teeny bit of a stretch. At first she was just acting on impulse, relatable and ultimately forgivable, and then she was trying out her alter ego with new beau Kyle, which is understandable and fun enough to watch to not raise any major flags. But the deeper into the lie she sinks, the less I believe Zoila would let it go that far. I mean, her boss must be coming back soon, yes? She will be living in that house, and Zoila didn’t even use a fake name with anybody! Hosting dinner parties and dating rich weirdos seems borderline moronic at this point, since it’s inevitably going to come crashing down on her, and likely sooner rather than later.

The second and lesser point of concern here for me is that I do not trust Adrian at all, and yes I could absolutely be wrong about this, but I don’t believe for a second that he doesn’t remember Zoila. Unlike the problems listed above, it is plausible that he doesn’t pay a blink’s worth of mind to any maid who couldn’t double as a professional model, but I just think he’s too cunning a character to be involved in Zoila’s current plot without it being a calculated move. Only time will tell on that one.

Genevieve and Rosie:

After her showdown with Marisol last week, Genevieve is left with disastrous hair and a renewed focus on her loss of a best friend in Zoila. She turns to Rosie, trying to earn her friendship and learn a little more about her, albeit with a mildly racist mariachi night. Unfortunately, Rosie is super busy trying to free her precious Mister Spence from prison.

A+, 10/10 super sleuth

Another wrench in the machinery of this season’s overarching mystery is the addition of Peri’s sister Shannon to the Westmore household. When the dots are connected between Shannon and the uber-suspicious Ben, Rosie snoops around after them hoping to find something useful. I can’t help but compare this show to Desperate Housewives sometimes, which I do find quite endearing. I hope some tumblr out there is GIFing every parallel scene, line, and cast member, and if anyone finds it, please point it my way. A classic DespHou (cute abbreviation I have actually used in real life, sounding insane, no doubt) callback, or any-soap-ever callback, was Rosie hiding under the bed while sneaking around and getting trapped there when Shannon and Ben come back home.

And she does get that scoop the hard way, pun absolutely intended, when after a lengthy lovemaking session, the two exchange some typical cryptic bad guy details. The briefly mention something called, “The Circle”, and seem like they’ll go on talking when Rosie’s cellphone goes off and stops the conversation cold in its tracks. Get it together, Rosie! Ben shrugs it off and heads out, finally breaking up the bind so Rosie can eventually get out.

I'm also here to ruin your life.

She doesn’t make it back in time for Genevieve’s misguided taco night though, so Genevieve remains BFFless for the moment. She ends up turning to her new hair stylist (*ahem* hair magician) for companionship and mani-pedi dates, but he is revealed to be one of the mysterious “Circle” followers! Turns out it’s a Scientology proxy called "Joynetics", and if Fabian is like any of the bug-eyed Dianetics peddlers I've met in LA, Genevieve better politely walk away, and fast. It's a surprising element to introduce to the Peri Westmore murder case, though, and I wonder how much this will factor into the investigation, but also how far Genevieve will fall into its sway, if at all.

Spence:

It's Killfacé!

Most of what Spence does nowadays is confirm or deny information Rosie brings back to him from her personal snooping, but this week he had a cute little runner about potentially being stalked and assaulted in prison by a man named Killface?? Of course, this is Devious Maids so nothing is quite as it seems. I also couldn’t help thinking of Scrubs’ recurring character Dr. Beardface (“It’s Beardfacé!), so I was pronouncing his name as Killfacé in my head. In the end, precious Killfacé was less a stalker and more a fan, trying to work up the nerve to present Spence with his script for a play several inmates would be putting on! Killfacé is rapidly becoming one of my favorite new characters this season.

Marisol and Evelyn:

My absolute favorite pairing lately came in the form of Evelyn and Marisol as the Odd Couple, becoming a pair of reluctant roommates after Adrian cuts off Evelyn’s finances. I almost feel like entering a brief interlude about financial abuse and where we can all buy purple purses to support the cause, but again, this is a soap, and I should really loosen up. That being said, Adrian is horrible, and holy cannoli please stay away from him, Evelyn.

Of course, Evelyn being thrust into the world of regular people only serves to remind us that she too is a horrible person, and she spends much of the episode insulting every person she talks to and progressively testing Marisol’s last nerves. I loved all of this though, particularly the back-and-forth dialogue, and Evelyn’s “gift” of redecorating Marisol’s living room on Marisol’s dime. Marisol suggests her new roomie start looking for a job, like a practical human person, but this more of an insult to Evelyn than anything else.

Two of your finest friendship bracelets, please!

Things between them really sour when Evelyn swipes Marisol’s credit card and gets busted almost instantly. She hilariously has no one else to call but Marisol, who I guess would have had to come down anyway to sort out the credit card business. This should have been the final straw, but Marisol had just treated Adrian Powell to a visit with the intention of getting Evelyn out of her house. It doesn’t take long for Adrian, to offend her enough to feel a sort of allegiance to Evelyn, promising herself she won’t let Evelyn go back to him.

So Marisol marches over the jail and bails out the woman who just stole her credit card. This whole episode had me wondering whether or not Evelyn has the wherewithal to survive in the real world. In another Desperate Housewives parallel, Evelyn really has the most in common with Bree Van de Kamp, they both even made friends with a hooker in jail (Stay strong, Coco!)! But there is a huge difference in the fact that Bree was and extraordinarily capable human being, an over-achieving Stepford Wife on steroids (if steroids were socially acceptable), whereas Evelyn is firmly planted in the world of the idle rich, the key word being idle. There’s a lot of fun in placing these uptight, queen bee characters in situations that leave them as floundering fish out water, but you get a sense that Bree will just figure things out eventually, whereas the bulk of our world is absolutely alien to Evelyn.

All of this pays off spectacularly by the end of the episode. Cece, a client Marisol has been chasing, finally takes a meeting with her regarding a massive account only to blow her off, when Evelyn swoops in and works her haughty magic. She ends up landing the client for Marisol by offering a couple of skills Marisol does not possess: an understanding of the wealthy women that utilize Marisol’s service and an unabashed talent for social politics. And she’s a real chismosa, which helps in digging up the dirt on said clients to be used for said social politics. It’s a match made in heaven, and Marisol offers Evelyn a job she might actually want.

Tell Killface I said... farewell... *thunk*

It was a pretty mixed episode this week, but ultimately really enjoyable. There was so much going on and everything moved so quickly- I barely had time to breath! But everything that worked at moving the season-long arcs forward left us with more information that we had last week, like the sinister "Circle" cult and Spence Westmore collapsing  in prison. Everything else was at worst, watchable filler, and at best, a brilliant character pairing that I hope will not flame out after a few episodes (*cough* Marisol and Evelyn *cough*).

Only six episodes left this season- what are you thinking so far? Shout it out in the comments below!

About the Author - Lindsey

Midwest native, Los Angeles transplant. Reader, writer, bartender, and TV nerd. Salad bar enthusiast. Watch this space!

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