Hi, sorry for the delay, I promise I will catch up fast.
-Cupid loves blood. Also heartache, shame, agony...
-Why would Cupid like that stuff?
-Because, if those things didn't exist, relationships would be easy and he's be out of a job.
Bicycle Thieves
This episode starts with a dream sequence where Alex is showing Valerie and Laura his office, but he finds Sarah Finn occupying his desk. After that,, he loses a tooth and is suddenly naked, all typical insecurity dream traits. When he actually goes to the office, Jordan tells him to be on time going forward to give a good example, which to Alex translates as Jordan being onto him. He calls Valerie to freak out, but once again she's busy, this time in an OB/GYN appointment.
Which takes us to her very uncomfortable moment with her gynecologist, who tells her to consider sterilization, and after that the woman starts laughing about a Minions movie. This is all very awkward as usual, though in this case it just felt a bit unnecessary. Then, she goes to the office and Leia scares her with tales of people dying alone with their cats eating their faces. So she starts considering having another kid, is not that she really wants to have more children but she feels insecure by the fact that Drew is panning in starting a new family while she's considered to be done with. So she goes to a bar to talk it over with Jennifer, who says there's still a lot she has missed in life, and going through the process of raising another baby won't help with that.
Jennifer: Val, you spend your whole life taking care of other people, and I'm sure that feels familiar and comfortable... but no.
Alex, after finding no counsel from Valerie, freaks out to Laura about the coincidence of Sarah appearing after ten years out of nowhere and being engaged to his new business partner, as if they were trying to steal his company.
Alex: I thought she was in a mental institution in Oklahoma.
Laura: Oklahoma?
Alex: Or Arkansas, I don't know. Some state where they don't let you out.
Laura: You can go talk to her.
Alex: Grow down, will you?
He takes her mature advice anyways, and asks Sarah what is it that Jordan Knows, she says she told him only what was necessary and avoided the gory details. He also asks Jordan himself if they are cool, his answer is that they're business partners so they should just settle for civility. So he decides he needs to know what was it that his father said to Sarah to make her go mad, and goes to Burbank to finally find out. His father tells him he told her Alex was cheating, also he said that the reason why that had happened was because he wasn't ready for that relationship, that he had been falling for her and he'd done it to drive her away out of fear. Alex is utterly shocked.
Moving on to Laura, we see her having lunch with her dad, this is actually the first proper scene between her and Drew alone, which is a shame since, as almost everyone else on this show, they have great chemistry.
Laura: Alex is better.
Drew: Alex is unstable.
Laura: Totally. And now he's off his meds. I'm kidding. He's been off for years.
Drew: Good to know you're not lacking for male role models.
Laura: Awww, you're afraid I'm gonna become a stripper?
So he finally gets to the point of the meeting, and tells Laura that Mae-Yi wants to have kids rather soon. Laura acts as if everything's fine, but she's shocked and overwhelmed. So, later, she gets a pot cookie from Spencer, one of her class mates.
Laura: It's kind of a cliché, right?
Spencer: Huh?
Laura: The only black kid in group with the drugs?
Spencer: Says the basic white chick trying to buy them.
After that she gets high with Aubrey and tells her what's going on. Aubrey says she wants to see her dad, so they go to the house but no one's home. Laura gets an idea and they steal the two bikes from the garage, which is symbolic of how her father met his new girlfriend, and they throw them from a hill to satisfy Cupid's thirst for blood.
Aubrey: Thirst for blood?
Laura: Uh-huh. Cupid loves blood. Also heartache, shame, agony...
Aubrey: Why would Cupid like that stuff?
Laura: 'Cause if those things didn't exist, relationships wold be easy and he'd be out of a job.
Post-sacrifice Laura grabs Aubrey's hand and they kiss. This was obviously coming, and I'm sure it will make for some interesting stuff, but I have to say I would have liked them more as twisted friends, I'm sure that would have lasted a lot more than any kind of relationship they could have. After all it was a sad high kiss, so it doesn't bode well for any kind of "normal" relationship, looks more like heartache's on the way for a change (sarcastically of course).
At the end of the episode Valerie and Laura come home to find Alex silently sitting on the countertop.
Alex: I loved her. I loved her and dad drove her away.
Of course this means he'll now be hung up on her and create a whole lot of mess at the office.
100 Cows
This episode starts with Alex trying to figure out how many cows, from Jordan and Sarah's wedding registry, would be enough to make a statement, since one of the options for wedding gifts was donating livestock. He decides on a hundred, only to find out they don't give the couple any information about the amount that was donated. So then, he asks for Leon's help who's sick in bed and turns out to be useless but I guess it's a way of keeping him in the show. Though I have to say, given the sweet moments we saw on last season's finale, I didn't expect him to get less screen time, it's sad because they are great together.
In a new attempt of getting Sarah's attention, he asks for Fallon's help. Jordan's assistant, played by Britt Robertson, suggests he should buy some chairs from her store, so he does buy eight ridiculously expensive ones but only gets a form e-mail as a thank you. Later, Fallon comes on to him and they have sex, but she surprises him the next morning by asking him to sign a Relationship Disclosure form from Human Resources. Alex doesn't know what to do since it could ruin his plan, so he asks Leon for help again, forgetting once more that he's not a lawyer.
Valerie, focused on her own thing, talks to Jennifer who tells her Jack asked for her number but she doesn't recommend dating him because he's messy, instead she pushes for her to call Harry. But when Valerie walks into her office, she finds Jack on her couch waiting for a pretend session. She analyses and explains everything that's wrong with him, and then kicks him out, but he says he won't go unless she agrees to go on a date with him, so she does. Since they didn't set a specific date, Laura and Alex encourage her to ask Harry out to be busy when Jack finally decided to call. So, she goes on a proper and boring date with Harry and they end up in bed. It's in that moment that Jack texts her while she's still in bed with Harry. This looks like it could get way too ugly.
Drew is concerned that Laura is lashing out about something, since some neighbors saw the girls close to the house the night the bikes where stolen, but when he asks her she denies it and throws him off by telling them she's just found out about a friend who has cancer. The kid is actually Spencer, the one who gave her the pot cookie, and Aubrey and Laura offer to make him a care-package to get better. They decide the best way to do that, is going to a party where Laura meets Max, a guy who's apparently with Aubrey, and the charming Daveed (pretentious spelling for David according to him) who will probably play some role in the episodes to come.
Then, they all play a game where guys want Aubrey and Laura to kiss every time a specific card appears, the girls complain about the fetish with lesbianism and make guys kiss to show that it's not gender specific. When the guys do kiss, the girls take advantage of the distraction and slip away to a room where they take half naked pictures for Spencer's care-package, and end up making out on the bed.
The episode ends with Sarah knocking on Alex's door to tell him to stop with the grand gestures and the attempts of making her jealous, which of course, only tells him that it's all working and he decides to go through with the public relationship with Fallon.
So, what did you think of these episodes? I would love to read our thoughts.
Note: English is not my first language so I apologize for any mistakes.
