Welcome to Last Week in TV. We're back with lots of episode awards after a short hiatus. Since the TV world doesn't stop while I take a short vacation away from it, I am of course still behind. I haven't seen all the new shows that premiered yet so I will review Of Kings and Prophets, The Real O'Neals, and The Carmichael Show next week. I will tackle The CW shows then too. This week it's about marathon viewing and cop procedurals mostly. Because I took time off, there are 2 episodes of the week. The Goldbergs had my favorite episode of everything I watched in hiatus. How to Get Away with Murder had my favorite episode last week. This week's nominated episode is a bit tricky too. Technically the first one randomly picked was Dominion but I am going to hold that until Easter weekend because I have a few more days then to marathon season 2. The second one randomly picked was The Listener, episode 1.08, but I can't find it through my usual measures. Therefore I will either review an episode I can find or the third episode randomly picked, The Guild. If you would like to nominate an episode, please fill in the short 2-question form below.
Before commencing with the column as usual, I would like to explain the format to people new to Last Week in TV. There was some confusion in the last one. The reviews in this column are purposefully brief in order to focus on a wider number of shows. Because there are typically between 15-22 episodes covered, there is no time to go into depth with each of them. If that is what you prefer, there are numerous excellent reviewers at SpoilerTV. Almost every show I cover here is also covered in depth by someone there. I encourage you to check out their in-depth analysis. This column has a different purpose that is not for everyone. These are just short impressions with much of the content covered through episode awards that are often snarky. Hopefully they spark conversation and inspire you to create your own episode awards for the shows you watched last week. Not everyone will agree on an episode and that's okay. Not everyone will enjoy this format and that's okay too. The good thing about SpoilerTV is that it covers a variety of opinions and more than one format so hopefully everyone's TV needs are covered. If this format works for you, then I'm glad. Add your own TV thoughts and episode awards in the comments section. Until then, happy TV viewing.
Episode of the Week
Note - Due the mini-hiatus, I have chosen 2 episodes for Episode of the Week. The Goldbergs had my favorite episode of the column hiatus but How to Get Away with Murder had the best episode that aired last week.
The Goldbergs (3.13-3.17)
I've missed The Goldbergs. I've missed the combination of heart and laughs . When The Goldbergs is on fire, there's no other comedy on air that can touch it. Out of everything I've watched in this mini-column hiatus, my favorite is episode 3.16 of this show. Yes, it has a baffling movie tie-in but it also had the Goldbergs protecting and supporting each other and that's my favorite thing about the show. I adore Pops telling Murray that he's family and that family takes care of its own. I'm a big fan of episodes that focus on the adults' relationships with each other. Then to have both Adam and Erica carry the message on with Barry was the icing. Add to it that I laughed throughout the episode but especially during the Home Games montage and you have everything I love about The Goldbergs in 22 minutes of pure entertainment. So in honor of the Home Games, The Goldbergs gets the gold from me this week - even if it didn't technically air this week. Oh and for the record, nothing beats Theme from Rocky XIII in Weird Al's repertoire. Yes, Smells Like Nirvana comes close and is dearer to my heart but still Rocky beating up liverwurst takes the highest honor. No one should outgrow Weird Al. Just saying. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGJd8FLAqRA
Grade: A- (episode 3.16) / B+ (overall)
Best Reason to Watch - as always, it's the combination of heart and laughs
Best Episode - Edward 'Eddie the Eagle' Edwards (3.16) for its overabundance of heart that still made me laugh
Best Awww Moment - Murray and Beverly cuddle in front of the football game / Barry and Erica cheer up Adam after his breakup
Best Scene - Pops tells Murray it's okay to rely on family so Murray asks Beverly for help
Best Twist - the actors playing the game show scouts were the actual kids who got on Double Dare
Best Translator - Erica, who can translate football into scrapbooking and vice versa
Best Bromance - Home Games
Best Reference - The Goonies
Best Nostalgia - Double Dare / Weird Al
Worst Reference - the futon aka the pinnacle of bad college furniture
Biggest Egads! - Who would pay $90 for a VHS movie?
Biggest Question - Why is an ABC show doing its best to promote a Fox movie?
Biggest Missed Opportunity - I really wanted to know what Murray would do for Valentine's Day for Beverly
Sweetest Apology - Adam tells Emmy that they will still be friends in the nursing home
Most Thoughtful Apology - Murray makes a scrapbook for Beverly
Most Creepy - Barry touching Lainey's face in his Lionel phase
Most Impressive - Geoff nailed the Dirty Dancing lift
Most Wonky Timeline - Yes, The Goldbergs timeline is all over the 80's, but no way Patrick Swayze played a bouncer before Dirty Dancing. Roadhouse was 2 years later. They should have stuck with greaser, Civil War stud, or American defender.
Most Funny - montage of Lionel busts
Most Depressing - People outgrow Weird Al. I still haven't. Well, the good songs….and Galavant.
Most Persistent - Barry and the busts / Geoff with Erica
The "Oh Poor Baby" Award - Dana and Adam break up
The "I'm with You" Award - Erica, you are right. That Lionel Ritchie video has a definite aroma of stalker.
The "Say What?" Award - I thought for sure that Murray and Beverly danced in the episode where they renewed their vows
Best Quotes -
1. Pops: "That's what family does. We take care of each other. There's no shame in that." Murray: "Yeah well, it feels like there is." Pops: "I know that's how it was in your family, but now you're my family and this is how we do it."
2. Beverly: "I don't mean to judge any of you but you're all terrible. Best of luck."
3. Murray: "I will kill you with this spatula, you thoughtful, thoughtful man."
4. Murray: "You think firewood grows on trees?" Pops: "Yes, that's what trees are. Wood."
5. Erica: "Why are you narrating your kitchen experience?"
6. Erica: "Who gets haunted in a good way?" Barry: "Kevin Costner in Field of Dreams." Erica: "Okay that was a fantastic example."
7. Pops: "Yes, I do sample from the salad bar of life."
8. Beverly: "Well you raised me to offer support and guidance and strong arm anyone into doing exactly what I want." Pops: "That's what you thought I meant when I said follow your dreams." Beverly: "Yes."
How to Get away with Murder - 2.14 - There's My Baby
After a very slow start, this season of How to Get Away with Murder has turned into an intense thriller just like last year. In this penultimate episode, the stakes are even higher as secrets are revealed and the characters prove that getting drunk in the midst of problems is a very, very bad idea. I had pegged Mahoney as the actual murderer that his son was on trial for being so having him be Wes' father was a complete shock to me. It was a great twist but here's hoping that it doesn't make Wes even stupider than he has been all season. While I enjoy Adam Arkin on my screen again, I really do not need Wes confronting him about his parentage. Still the back story has made for interesting story fodder and it explains why Annalise, an accomplished professional, cares in the least about Wes. They've done a great job tying things together. Yet the most intriguing part of the season is still Lila for me. Why did Frank kill her for Sam? What leverage did he have? Why did Laurel spilling that Frank killed her cause Annalise to run off like that instead of confronting him? This whole episode brought up more questions and revisited older ones. I'm not expecting answers to even most of them in the season finale but I know there's going to be one heck of a twist at the end. It's How to Get Away with Murder so there basically has to be.
Grade: A-
Best Scene - the DA interrogations
Best Acting - Annalise breaks down over her dead baby
Best Character Interaction - Bonnie and Frank / Annalise and Wes
Best Twist - Mahoney is Wes' father
Biggest Ho Hum - Caleb is missing. Does anyone besides Michaela actually care?
Biggest Letdown - nothing about Phillip went anywhere
Biggest Smart Alec - all of the students (except Asher) while being investigated by Denver
Most in Need of a Gag - Laurel, who can't be trusted with anyone's secrets
Most in Need of Brain Bleach - me after Asher and Michaela hook up - ugh!
The "Truth is Spoken" Award - Bonnie says they are all bad people because they are
The "Welcome Back" Award - Cicely Tyson as Annalise's mom
Best Quotes -
1. Bonnie: "Stop apologizing. We're all bad people. That's the only thing we have in common."
2. Annalise: "What is this? A homeless shelter? Get out."
3. Annalise: "He's just trying to scare us. Talk to him. You'll be alright." Asher: "Will I? Because I haven't done these like everyone else, who seem to be really good at them." Annalise: "You will be too and you know why? Because you're smarter than people think."
4. Connor: "So good luck screwing me because you're not really my type."
5. Eve: "Okay I get it. You feel like you owe him something as to why. But he's not a child or your child. He's a man and he can handle the truth." Annalise: "How did this become my life?" Eve: "Because you're messed up like all of us."
Nominated Episode
Legend of the Seeker - 2.03 - Broken
I marathoned Legend of the Seeker a few years ago because of some SpoilerTV fans. I liked it but because I watched it so quickly, I don't really remember it. I did however remember this episode because it gave back story on Cara. It is also about the time that I decided I liked Cara better than Kahlan to the shock of most Legend of the Seeker fans. In many ways, I see the resemblance of this crew to the recent ensemble of The Shannara Chronicles. Kahlan is the super special princess like Amberle. Cara is the hardened woman with a scarred childhood that makes her tough, independent, and yet still vulnerable in a way that Amberle is not. Richard, well, he's the mostly less stupid Wil, who if I remember right does NOT sleep with both female leads. So score one for him. As for this episode, I liked the action. I'm a sucker for a good sword fight, which is why I watched the show to begin with. I also liked Richard playing conflict mediator and his inherent belief in the goodness of people, even those who have previously done evil things. Still this episode is high on emoangst and speeches and has less action and humor than I remember in the series, which knocks the grade down a bit. I do however recommend the series as a whole to anyone who loves fantasy epic adventures and has a tolerance for the cheesy special effects that come with a fairly small budget. My guess is that at least one character will take your fancy and you'll happily go along for the ride. I would however suggest not mega marathoning it because the plot gets muddled and things run together. This is a good one to watch a few episodes a week instead of the entire 44 episodes in a few days.
Grade: B
Ranking - already watched the whole series
Audience - those who like high fantasy epics with strong female characters and a dose of humor
Best Reason to Watch - Cara back story / sword fights
Best Scene / Best Action - town sword fight to free Cara
Best Character - Cara's sister
Best Job Perk - being a Mord-Sith means everyone is so terrified of you that you pretty much get what you want until someone gathers enough courage and people to fight back
Worst Job Perk - no one wants a Mord-Sith in their town so you're basically persona non grata to everyone
Worst Twist - Cara killed her father / Cara's teacher is Mord-Sith and the one who brought her into it
Worst Welcome - Cara's brother-in-law turns her into the authorities
The "Poor Baby" Award - Cara's father has his throat burned out
Most Bloodthirsty - Captain Arturius
Most Played - Flynn when Zed used magic against him
Biggest Super Special Snowflake - Kahlan
Biggest Hero - Richard, who defends Cara even when it's not popular
Biggest Hypocrite - Kahlan, yeah this is about justice. Okay then.
Best Quotes -
1. Nathair: "In this world, it is kill or be killed. If you want the death of a thousand little nibbles, that is you decision to make but if you consider your life more important than a rat's, then you must kill them."
2. Cara: "You think just because you were poked a few times with an Agiel you know anything about me? Being chosen by the Mord-Sith was the highest honor of my life." Richard: "Your pride is going to get you killed." Cara: "I'd rather die than grovel on my knees and beg for mercy."
3. Flynn: "And the Seeker? Ha! If he were so good, you'd have think he'd have found me by now. I think that old fool of the First Order gave the Sword of Truth to the wrong farm boy. That's what I think."
4. Kahlan: "I have looked into this woman's eyes and I see now that she is truly remorseful. Her life was taken from her as a child. I will not take it from her again."
5. Zedd: "What you know about wizards could fit inside the teacup of a night wisp."
Guest Reviews
Agents of SHIELD - 3.11 - Bouncing Back
BY Swanpride
I needed a little bit to figure out why this episode was such a big let-down for me. On paper, it did everything right. Seeing President Ellis in person instead of just on the screen was a nice surprise. The new characters and their powers worked for me. The team even had to work around a language barrier this time around and Ward was delightfully creepy. But the actual plot was just so incredibly predictable. Just once I want to see an episode in a South-American country which doesn't do the old tired plot point of the government officials being corrupt. There might be a lot of truth in it but the whole concept is so overdone, I knew from the get go that Elena was not the villain in the scenario. In the end the episode boiled down to waiting for the characters to realize what the audience already knew. Thus said, I liked what was set up so far and the episode gets bonus points for finally addressing at least some overdue morality questions concerning the way S.H.I.E.L.D. treats Inhumans. And in the end, it was a good set-up for things to come.
Grade: C+
Best Reason to Watch - Secret Warriors!!!!!
Best Scene - The flash-forward in the beginning. Not only was it a fitting start for an episode with this title, it also gave us enough details to wonder about for the next three months.
Best Character - Joey and Elena are allotted quite a bit of screen-time, which pays off for both characters.
Best Team-up - Hunter and Bobbi. They really deserve each other.
Best Effects- The way they showed Elena's power is very neat.
Best Detail - Malick's emergency line having on-hold music
Best Prop - The back-up watch. A good solution to prevent the show from becoming overcrowded with characters while still allowing Daisy's team to grow.
Best Action - Yoyo vs Medusa gaze
Most creepy - Everything involving Ward. I never knew that the simple act of eating could be so unsettling to watch.
Most random observation - It never really occurred to me before, but fish actually are a Christian symbol
My prediction of the week - Coulson and Talbot working together should be a ton of fun.
Best Quote:
1. Hunter: "Tell me you didn't try one of those fish oil pills. I had my fingers crossed for x-ray vision."
2. Daisy: "How do you lose someone as big as Mack?"
3. May: "You joined the cavalry."
Criminal Minds – 11.15 – A Badge and A Gun
BY Emma
The case this week featured an Unsub that posed as an FBI agent to get access to his victims. It’s an effective rouse as most of us are taught from a young age that law enforcement are the good guys but I’ve watched this show for far too long to let anyone, law enforcement included, into my house without knowing them very well! The case moves along at a good pace and the Unsub is caught in the usual fashion. I feel the case of the week was deliberately straightforward as the real purpose of this episode was to set up the events for next week’s Derek-centric episode. There were some great team moments to remind us of how important Derek is to everyone, a great tease for Derek and Savannah’s future, and of course, the abduction to ensure we all tune in next week.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch – set up for next episode
Scariest Unsub Ever – the pretending to be law enforcement kind
Best Scene – Rossi and Garcia teasing Morgan about Savannah’s text
Best Character Interaction – Rossi, Garcia and Morgan
Worst Text Message – “We need to talk”
The “Nice Try” Award – Derek, trying to lie about his feelings to profilers
Best Code for “I’m Pregnant” – strawberry ice cream
The “Welcome Back” Award (character) – Agent Colfax played by Marisol Nichols
The “Welcome Back” Award (actor) – Carmine Giovinazzo formerly of CSI: NY
Best Quotes -
1. Morgan: “It’s Savannah. She wants to meet for dinner tonight because we need to talk. Trust me, I’ve gotten this text enough times in the past to know it isn’t good.” Rossi: “Hey look, all I know is Savannah is a wonderful woman and you two love each other. It’ll be fine.” Morgan: “Ya?” Rossi: “No, you’re probably completely screwed but good luck anyway.”
2. Garcia: “Why are you asking? Oh come on, really? The good guys are supposed to be good.”
3. Morgan: “Look, if I’m coming home to a firing line, I think I deserve to know that. Baby, seriously. Are you unhappy? Savannah, is it over?” Savannah: “No. I just want to tell you I’m happy. And maybe I’ll show you how happy when I get home.” Morgan: “Ok, I think I like the sound of that.” Savannah: “Boy you better check yourself. It’s not want you think.”
Criminal Minds – 11.16 – Derek
BY Emma
I watched this entire episode with my hands over my face, peeking through the cracks of my fingers. I expected one last bad guy to pop out of the closet and kill Derek. Criminal Minds rarely kills off a character when an actor leaves the show but Derek is so happy with Savannah, and now there is a baby on the way, so I just kept expecting him to die. I guess The 100 has finally started to affect the way I watch other shows! This was a heartbreaking episode with phenomenal acting throughout. I was doing fine until the scene with Derek and his dad at the stream, the safe place he created in his mind when he was molested as a boy. That scene started the waterworks and they didn’t stop until the end of the episode. Even though Derek survived this episode, and there is still one more before the official good bye episode, I still think that it’s Derek that will be leaving us. I just hope that it is because he wants a stable home life for his growing family and like Emily, he will come back to visit every now and then.
Grade: A-
Best Reason to Watch – all the Derek and his father moments
Best Scene – Derek proposes to Savannah
Best Use of Training – Derek disassociating himself
Best Continuity – Derek’s molestation as a kid (revealed way back in season 2)
Best Cause for Celebration – Derek is still alive
Most Surprising – No opening and no closing quote (has this ever happened before??)
Biggest Mystery – Why was Morgan targeted? What does the CIA have to do with this?
The “That’ll Give Me Nightmares” Award – Derek’s chest on fire from white phosphorus
The “Did That Just Happen?” Award – bad guy swallows sim card, Derek cuts it out of his stomach
The “Hmmmm” Award – If Derek’s Pops died when he was 10, why is he aged in Derek’s mind?
The “Who Has That?” Award – Copper sulfate, seriously, who has that in their house?
The “Welcome Back” Award – Danny Glover, one of my favorite actors ever
Best Quotes -
1. Garcia: “So I checked all the other cell signals in the area and they’re all legit aside from one that I was only able to find thanks to some technology no one outside this room needs to know about.”
2. Pops: “Oh man, you know how many knuckle heads I could’ve put away if I had your training? The question is can you apply that training to yourself?”
3. Pops: “No, I’m not ashamed. I’m proud.” Morgan: “Proud? How can you be proud?” Pops: “Because you turned your pain into your greatest asset.”
Heartland - 9.16 – Pandora’s Box
BY BlueStar
Summary: In this episode Amy works with Ty to get a horse to allow them to give her the medical treatment she needs. During this time Ty debates whether or not to open a package given to him by his mother that his father had given her before he died. Meanwhile, Lisa has a health scare and Lou and Mitch find themselves stuck together at the Dude Ranch. Also, Georgie and Adam work through their issues. All in all, this was a solid episode with a couple really heartfelt scenes.
Grade: B+
Best Reason To Watch – The two longest lasting couples on the show both have some great moments
Best Scene – Lisa tells Jack she is scared about what her test results will be and he comforts her
Best Return – Marion’s journal
Cheesiest Joke – Adam: “What do you do with a sick chemist? Well, if you can’t Helium, and you can’t Curium, then you might as well Barium.”
Biggest Relief: Lisa doesn’t have cancer or any other serious disease
Must Be College Kids – The latest Dude Ranch guests put the furniture on the roof in revenge for Lou’s house rules (or they just got really drunk, or both).
Most Hard To Work With – Lou, whose perfectionism and harassing nature is enough to drive anyone nuts
Most Cliché Romance – Lou and Mitch have been fighting like cats and dogs but that’s covering up their feelings for each other
Most Complicated Award – Brad, who screwed up badly at being a father and a husband, but clearly cared for his family.
Most Fun Award – Ty and Amy ride off on his motorcycle to the post office.
Best Quotes:
1. Lisa: “I’m a little bit worried…I’m scared. So I just wanna do something or I may just fall apart.” Jack: “What’s wrong with that?”
2. Ty: “You had a real mom, Amy. She was there for you. My Dad was never around, and there’s nothing in a safety deposit box that is ever going to change that.” Amy: “I know. But I can’t help but wonder what’s worst. The chance that you might find something that you don’t like, or that you might never know what’s actually in that box?”
3. Lou: “You know what, this isn’t going to work. I’m just going to get a horse and ride back to the ranch.” Mitch: “Yeah, your high horse.”
Suits - 5.15 - Tick Tock
BY Laura Markus
I thought the intro and the outro were the strongest parts of the episode. While certain other scenes fell flat to me, opening with Mike in Harvey's apartment talking about the trial, then cutting to the trial was excellent, and the writing was great. Even in a Donna and Harvey scene, they couldn't resist talking about Mike.
- "I have a way, but you're not gonna like it." Nice quote, Mike. If this isn't the theme of the entire show...
- I did not like Rachel in this episode. But to make up for it, someone actually remembered the season 1 finale Dog Fight, the Clifford Danner case, and Clifford's mom. Give this person a raise! Clifford's mom was so sweet, and I actually liked Clifford a lot as a character and am kind of peeved they killed him off.
- Jessica was a queen. As per usual. Let's move on.
- Louis, why are you begging me to hate you more than I already do? Enough is enough already.
- And lastly, that beautiful outro. The music choice was fantastic, the directing was stunning, and the acting - well there wasn't much dialogue but their faces said it all. The chemistry Patrick and Gabriel continue to effortlessly breathe after all these years is astounding. Harvey, racing through the streets of 'New York' to save Mike was beautiful. Mike's closing statement was almost the saddest scene of the episode, but this took the cake.
Grade: B-
Suits - 5.16 - 25th Hour
BY Laura Markus
Once again, Suits has proven that the show's fundamentals and entire basis was formed surrounding the relationship between Harvey and Mike; it doesn't matter in what way. It started with their secret, and everything that has happened until now has to do with them. With Mike in prison, who knows what will happen to their relationship. I certainly have the right to be scared. On another note, there were two outstanding scenes I have to praise. The beautiful and tragic scene of Harvey provoking Mike to punch to see if he can withstand prison roughness. Absolutely stunning, and I would be lying if I said I didn't cry my heart out. And the ending scene, with the juxtaposition of Harvey and Mike talking about their lives, Mike walking into prison, and Jessica, Louis, and Donna arriving at the now empty Pearson Specter Litt. A clean slate was what they wanted, and they set that up quite nicely.
Grade: A-
Best Reason to Watch - They are actually putting Mike in jail, which is what a lot of people wanted.
Best Scene - Harvey provokes Mike to fight him in his apartment.
The "Awww!" Award - Mike telling Harvey that despite how things ended up, he would do it again.
Funniest Moment - Harvey yelling at Donna. It was pretty great.
The "Oh, Crap!" Award - Mike and Harvey's fight and their comedown.
Best Juxtaposition & Best Cliffhanger - Clean slates: Mike walking into prison and the empty firm.
The "Why You Always Lyin'?" Award - Harvey to Mike about his verdict.
Best Quotes -
1. Mike: "It's not your fault, Harvey. I made my case. I convinced you to hire me." Harvey: "I was the one that made the call." Mike: "You were. But it doesn't matter. 'Cause even knowing how it all turned out I'd do it again." Harvey: "I guess I would too, 'cause I never thought in a million years I'd meet someone dumb enough to be willing to go to prison for me." Mike: "I mean, Donna always said you were looking for another you. I guess you found one. [...] I guess it's time to get busy living and get busy dying." Harvey: "Well, that's god** right. [...] Watch your back in there, Mike." Mike: "I will."
2. Harvey: "What are you doing here?" Mike: "Harvey, I want to talk to you." Harvey: "Good, because I want to talk to you." Mike: "I want you to be my best man." Harvey: "What?" Mike: "Rachel and I want to get married." Harvey: "You're less than a day from prison, and you're thinking about dresses and flowers" Mike: "Harvey-" Harvey: "You know what? I'll be your best man on one condition." Mike: "That ship has sailed." Harvey: "The hell it has. We can still call Gibbs." Mike: "I am not calling Gibbs." Harvey: "Get it through your head. This is on me." Mike: "No, you get it through your head. I am not letting you go to prison for a crime that I committed." Harvey: "Well, I'm not letting you go when you were gonna be found innocent." Mike: "What did you say?" Harvey: "That's right, I lied. The verdict was not guilty." Mike: "No, I don't believe you." Harvey: "Then call the goddamn guy." Mike: "Why the hell would you lie to me?" Harvey: "Because the truth would have broken you." Mike: "Oh, except now you want to break me?" Harvey: "Because it's the only way you're gonna let me do this. You think putting a ring on Rachel's finger is gonna make everything go away?" Mike: "You know what, Harvey? You want to come to my wedding, you let me know." [glass shattering] Harvey: "You want to go to prison? Rule number one: never turn your back on anyone." Mike: "I know what you're doing, and it's not gonna work." Harvey: "I'm not trying to take your place anymore. I'm trying to get you ready like Gloria Danner asked me to." Mike: "Harvey-" Harvey: "Because you're weak." Mike: "I am not weak." Harvey: "Yeah, well, hit me." Mike: "No." Harvey: "Hit me." Mike: "Harvey, stop it. Listen-" Harvey: "No, you listen to me. You think you're not weak?" Mike: "You're only doing this because you feel guilty, all right?" Harvey: "Louis Litt got you in a headlock." Mike: "But I am not gonna hit you just because-" Harvey: "Tess's husband kicked you’re a**." Mike: "You can't handle the fact-" Harvey: "Logan Sanders hooked up with Rachel." Mike: "Stop right now." Harvey: "What do you think he's gonna do with her the second you get-" [Mike starts beating Harvey up] Mike: "Is that what you want? That I hate you, and that you made me do this? I'm gonna lose everything because of you!" [...] Harvey: "Mike, please. Let's call Gibbs. Mike: "I can't. I can't, Harvey. I can't."
3. Mike: "I know you're p** that I made a deal before you, but I need you to tell me that I made the right call." Harvey: "You did." Mike: "How can you be so sure?" Harvey: "Because I went to see the verdict foreman and he told me the verdict was guilty. Look, the idea of you going to prison was killing me, and I couldn't let it go unless I knew." Mike: "And now you can." Harvey: "I still wish you would've let me take the hit instead of you, but yeah, I can. Go home, Mike. Get whatever time you have left with Rachel." Mike: "It's gonna be easier now. I never thought the word 'guilty' would do that."
4. Mike: "How'd you know?" Harvey: "I knew, and there's no way I'm letting you do this alone."
5. Harvey: "God** it, Mike, don't do this. We can go to verdict." Mike: "Don't give me that. You weren't racing over to her office to tell her that the jury was back. You were going to jump on the grenade, and I beat you to it. Now I told you it's done, and it's done."
6. Harvey: "Donna, Mike just threw his whole life away, and there's nothing I can do about it, and the only way that I can accept it is if I find out what that verdict was gonna be."
7. Donna: "I don't think I've ever seen a more beautiful bride." Rachel: "That's good, because I have never seen a more beautiful maid of honour."
New Shows
Damien - 1.01 - Pilot
Hmmm. I'm just not sure about this one. On one hand, I like Bradley James. On the other, I think Megalyn Echikunwoke may be the worst actress currently working in TV. She almost singlehandedly ruined The 4400 for me. On one hand, the mystery is intriguing. On the other, I have as much interest in humanizing the antichrist and I do in humanizing the devil. That being said, this pilot was a whole lot better than Lucifer. While Lucifer is a straight up narcissistic douche, Damien feels more layered and I'm not seeing a partnership love interest yet although that may come. Plus it's likely to be a serial show that builds on the mystery every week which I think will work better for this type of storytelling than the case of the week format of Lucifer. I'm tentatively giving this show 2 more episodes to make or break but either way I doubt it becomes weekly TV for me. I have no holes in my TV schedule and even one scene of Megalyn was enough for me.
Grade: C+
Ranking - 2+
Audience - those who like loosely based religious intrigue where the traditional bad guy is the morally ambivalent good guy
TV Formula - one part Dig plot + action + gore + a hot guy
Best Reason to Watch - the mystery
Best Scene - Damien breaks down at church
Best Flashback - Damien with his father at church earlier
Biggest Mystery - Why didn't they kill off Simone instead of Kelly or at least cast them differently?
Biggest Ewww - dog tearing Reneus apart
Most Creepy - Rutledge, who has to be Satan, right?
The "Welcome Back" Award - Bradley James from Merlin and iZombie / Barbara Hershey from Beaches and Chicago Hope / Tiffany Hines from Stitchers and Bones / Sam Anderson from Angel
The Family - 1.01 / 1.02 - Pilot / All You See is Dark
Although I was initially pretty excited about this show, it ended up committing the cardinal TV sin. It bored me. I doubt Adam is Adam but it makes no sense that this is a conspiracy so big that they had a doctor perjure himself and someone stole the dental files so there's no way to check them. She's a smalltime mayor for goodness sake. They needed to either make her a more spotlight worthy candidate or they needed to back it into reality. Plus it's yet another show where I cannot root for anyone because they are all awful. Every single one of them. You'd think that the guy wrongly locked up for murder would be a sympathetic character, but he's a full-on pedophile who was grooming the kid to be his victim. And he may not end up being the worst character. On the plus side though, the acting is top-notch. Joan Allen and Rupert Graves are phenomenal as a couple who don't just lose their son in a tragedy but their marriage and even themselves. The writing is also decent except for the pacing so that's enough for me to give it one more episode before putting it on the backburner.
Grade : C-
Best Scene - Claire sees Adam again for the first time
Best Reason to Watch - the acting
Worst Human Who Isn’t a Murderer or Pedophile or Politician - Bridey, who makes the alcoholic worse / Willa, who blackmails her own dad
Biggest Mooch - Danny
Least Surprising - the cop and the husband are screwing
Most Likely to Tell It Like It Is - Officer Meyer, who tells the family to stop blaming each other and focus on the missing kid
Most Creepy - Adam, who is probably not Adam
Most Cold - Claire won't let John hug Adam until they get inside
Dumbest Move - Willa breaks into Hank's house to collect evidence
Best Quotes -
1. Hank: "You're sorry for what happened to me?" John: "Yes, I am." Hank: "You happened to me. Your family happened to me. Did you want me to forgive you? This city was a mob. They were after me. I couldn't beat this monster no matter what and you people lit the torches." John: "Now wait a minute…" Hank: "You know what I thought about, John? When I laid in my cell, I thought about your boy - your beautiful little boy. I'd wished I did it. I wish I took him from you and hurt him. Wrap my fingers around his throat and watch the life drip from his little body, bit by bit. So don't feel sorry about what happened to me. I didn't spend a minute feeling sorry for what happened to you."
2. Claire: "I waited 10 years to get my son back. You can wait 1 night."
3. Claire: "I gave up." John: "Well, we all did." Claire: "But I gave up on more than just him."
4. Hank: "Remember me? I'm the guy who killed you."
5. Claire: "You can't get a search warrant unless you have evidence and you can't get evidence until you have a search warrant." Meyer: "Welcome to the justice system."
6. Claire: "While it's lovely to have you back home again, could you refrain from taunting the media? I still have a job to get back to."
7. Meyer: "You want to kill him. That's understandable." John: "No, I want to kill everyone he loves."
Weekly Shows
The 100 - 3.07 - Thirteen
First off, this is by far the best episode of The 100 this season. It had great twists and most importantly, absolutely ZERO Arkadia. That's a win every time. I liked the flashbacks as a whole and I adored how they did the miraculous - made me finally interested in the Alie storyline. I was shocked in a good way when we learned exactly how connected Becca was to Polis. Taking the Alie chip out of Lexa's neck had my jaw dropped and me cheering. The flashbacks were superb, even in the parts I did not like, and it gives us another morally grey character in Becca. Was she as crazy as she seems or was there actual logic in her madness? This was more like The 100 I knew and loved in earlier seasons. While I'm not happy that my third favorite character on this show is dead, I do think that they treated Lexa's death with grace. I applaud the acting between Eliza and Alycia in the end, making the most out of an emotional scene. Still it was actually the care Lexa showed Titus, who shot her, that stuck out to me. Lexa was a powerful and intriguing character and she will be much missed. So will Polis because there is little reason to stay there much longer, leaving us in the story wasteland that is Arkadia. Ugh!
That being said, there are 2 major flaws in the episode that keep me from making it the show of the week. First off, logically it made little sense. Come on. A space station gets bombed out of the sky, does not burn up at all in re-entry, and then instead of shattering into a billion pieces upon landing, it remains upright and structurally firm enough to create an instant skyscraper apartment building? Really? Are you kidding me? That's beyond any stretch of the imagination. Must have been one heck of a building sized parachute. The second one is going to get me in trouble with many fans. It makes ZERO sense to me that Clarke still has romantic feelings for Lexa at all, much less enough for that sex scene goodbye. It shouldn't even make sense after Finn's death. No, I am NOT saying Lexa is to blame for Finn's death but she is directly involved with why Clarke made the decision to kill her best friend. I don't care if your best friend deserves it. You aren't going to become romantically intertwined with the person who activates their death. Would you want to screw the person who put the needle in your best friend's arm for the death penalty? It wouldn't matter if they were guilty or not. That person will forever be linked to the death of someone you cared about. To have Clarke still lusting after Lexa now is even more ludicrous to me. Lexa is directly responsible for Clarke having to face the Mountain Men alone. Whether you agree with Lexa's decision or not, it put Clarke in a very tough spot - one that ended with Clarke committing genocide. Clarke killed 26 innocent kids in part because Lexa betrayed her. There should be no way that she looks at Lexa and sees anything but her own worst moment in a life full of horrible moments. By this time, the only thing Lexa should represent to Clarke is death and her own guilt. It's not just that this is out-of-character for Clarke. It's out of character for humanity. Both the logic issues and the sex scene pull the grade down for me.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch- the huge leap forward in the plot
Best Scene - the ending
Best Character Interaction - Indra and Octavia, simply because the sex scene precludes me from thinking Lexa and Clarke should get it
Most Missed Already - Lexa, a bright shiny spot this season, who gave us a reason to hang out in Polis
Most Intriguing Character Now - Titus, who is the closest thing we've got to grounder history and culture, outside of Lincoln who is still locked up
Most Evil - Becca, who kills her own people because she thinks she's right AFTER killing most of the world
Biggest Eye Roll - Lexa and Clarke sex scene
Biggest What the Heck? - So a space station falls from space. It doesn't burn up in orbit. It doesn't shatter to pieces when it hits the ground. Instead it lands perfectly upright to create the world's first skyscraper that descends from the sky. Um, okay. If you say so. Sure.
Biggest Say What? - Since when is Murphy a friend to Clarke?
The "Congratulations, You Blew Up the World" Award - Becca
The "Welcome Back" Award - Roger R. Cross from Arrow and The Strain
Best Quotes -
1. Indra: "You see, even someone as slow and weak as you can put me on my back. I should have died on that field." Octavia: "We all die. You can either do that here feeling sorry for yourself or you come back with me and get your revenge. The choice is yours."
2. Lexa: "You were right, Clarke. Life is about more than surviving."
3. Titus: "My faith has got nothing to do with yours." Murphy: "Trust me. I have no faith."
4. Octavia: "If you're not there, you're not the person I thought you were."
5. Commander: "Becca, you already have the blood of billions on your hands. Is it worth risking the rest of us just to prove you're right?"
The 100 - 3.08 - Terms and Conditions
This is the first time I have liked Arkadia all year. It was also Kane-centered. Coincidence? I think not. I love how things are heating up in Arkadia as both sides play each other. By the way, Kane's team is smarter and has better morals, which is exactly why most of them are locked up by episode's end. Pike and Monty's mom continue to be psychotic and I continue to root for Alie to drop a bomb on Arkadia and end the whole mess. If Kane actually dies, that goes double. The best part of this episode was the two teams trying to outsmart each other and the politics were fairly interesting, although not Polis-level interesting. I also adore that Raven is slowly getting out of her zombie stage and that next episode may be the catalyst for turning both Bellamy and Monty back from the utter douches they currently are. Still, this episode is based almost solely on talking and pondering and arguing until the prison break. It's not so much exposition overload as it is talking through the character devolution that is already irksome. If anything had changed, if anyone had a revelation, then this would have been worth it. Instead, they all keep carrying on as they have been for several episodes. In other words, filler. We could have been in Polis dealing with the aftermath of Lexa's death instead of each character continuing to blather about how right they are. We know all this. I don't know how the grounder commander is chosen and that's far more interesting to me right now.
Grade: B-
Best Scene - prison break plot so Kane can kidnap Pike
Best Character - Kane, of course
Best Reason to Watch - Raven pulling away from Alie
Best Reaction - everyone to watching Kane being marched into prison
Most Worrisome - this episode is Kane-centric, which better NOT mean that he's going to be killed
Biggest Hmm - Where's Abby?
Biggest Psychopath - Monty's mom, who needs to die just as much as Pike does
Biggest Laugh - Bellamy literally shoots the messengers
Biggest Surprise - Jasper was almost tolerable this episode
The "He Does Exist" Award - Lincoln finally graces my screen again. It's been too long, sir.
The "MIA" Award - Clarke, Octavia, Indra, Abby, and everything Polis
Best Quotes -
1. Bellamy: "You're a good man." Bryan: "Am I? Is this…is any of this worth lying to someone I love." Bellamy: "It is if you're protecting him." Bryan: "Unless the person he needs protection from is me."
2. Kane: "Assume there are eyes on us at all times." Harper: "Or we could just shock lash Pike's fascist a** and hand him to the grounders." Kane: "That would be murder, not to mention treason, and that's not who we are." Miller: "Maybe that's who we need to be." Kane: "Not yet."
3. Raven: "Favorite place?" Jasper: "Down here or up there?" Raven: "Either. Both." Jasper: "Starboard window bay. That has the best view of the moon on the whole damn ship and we used to get a little baked, sit back, watch the sky playing On Which Planet Would You Rather? Answer was always Earth. We were such dumba**."
4. Bellamy: "Keeping an eye on Sinclair was an easy call." Kane: "Was it? Spying on your friend, that was easy?" Bellamy: "People in camp are losing focus. There's a threat outside these walls…"Kane: "The threat's inside these walls. Can't you see that? Pike's turning us against each other." Bellamy: "Pike's the Chancellor. Have you forgotten that?" Kane: "No, no, I haven't." Bellamy: "Then do the right thing." Kane: "That's the problem. No matter how I look at it, I am."
5. Jasper: "Who is going to figure that out?" Raven: "I was thinking you." Jasper: "Uh huh. Well we were just talking about how I'm a drunken idiot."
Agent Carter - 2.06 -2.10 - Hollywood Ending
While I always enjoy Agent Carter, I'm not sure marathoning it works as well for me. I found myself getting weary of the plot by the time the series (probably) finished. Of course that might also be because of the incessant focus they put on the love triangle in 3 episodes that would have done better without it. I also feel like Carter wasn't as integral to the finale of this season as she was the last one. Add in a rift with Jarvis towards the end and I liked season 1 better than season 2. That's not to say that I didn't like this one because I did. Rose and Ana were both marvelous. I will miss them more than some of the main characters to be honest. I also like that Dottie rejoined them for awhile. She makes everything better and her scenes with both Carter and Frost were fantastic. Sadly neither she nor Carter got to do as much hand-to-hand combat as last season but those were still the best action scenes when they did. The scenes between Jarvis and Ana were great as well and I'm glad they gave James D'Arcy something to really dig deep on instead of all comedy. Watching him at Ana's bedside was heartbreaking. Kudos to both the acting and the writing there. All in all, while I was a little disappointed, I still prefer Agent Carter over all other comic-based shows. I am sad that it will probably not see another season, but not as sad as I would have been last year. They ended it nicely with only a small cliffhanger and who really cares about Thompson anyway?
Grade: B-
Best Scene / Biggest Aww Scene - Jarvis promises everything if Ana just wakes up and she does
Best Character Interaction - Carter and Dottie / Carter and Jarvis
Best Wife Ever- Ana Jarvis
Best Friend - Carter comforts Jarvis while he waits for his wife to wake up
Biggest What the Heck - Pop-up musical sequence about love triangles. I'm just astounded that we're wasting time on this when there's only 2 episodes left in probably the entire series.
Biggest Shock - Jarvis shoots Frost
Biggest Understatement Ever - Carter says she has a terrible idea and since that idea includes putting Dottie in the field, I think terrible is too mild a word for it
Biggest Laugh - Jarvis and Carter's charades while Dottie is under the hair dryer
Biggest Man of Action - Sousa, who doesn't talk about going into the danger zone but just goes / Carter and all the others who jump in to save him
Most Vicarious Thrill - Carter punches out Masters
Most Likely to Slit Your Throat in Your Sleep - Manfredi's mama
Most Intense - Sousa vs. Masters
Most Oblivious - Jarvis to the fact that Ana is worried
Most Amusing / Most Besotted - the love struck mobster Manfredi makes for pretty good comic relief
Least Surprising - Frost takes Dottie
Quickest Thinking - Sousa messes with Frost's math
The "Oh Poor Baby" Award - Jarvis fears that he's going to lose Ana
The "We Don't Have Time for This" Award- What the heck? We have places to break into and bad guys to catch. Why the heck are we wasting time on a freaking love triangle much less stopping mid-episode to have a car side chat about it? This isn't a freaking Impala and I really don't care.
The "Welcome to the SSR" Award - Jarvis' wife looks askew about Peggy's injury and the fact that she's still up and moving
The "You've Got to Die" Award - anyone who hurts Ana, the most amazing character on this show, must go
The "Welcome Back" Award - Angie / Dottie / Ana Jarvis / Rose / Michael / Stark
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Tom Choi aka HistoryDad on Teen Wolf
Best Quotes -
1. Dottie: "It takes more than 6 walls to hold me." Carter: "Six?" Dottie: "We're in a cube, Peggy. Try to keep up."
2. Stark: "You kids are so cute. I bet you crammed for your finals and everything." Carter: "What are you shuttering about?" Stark: "The answer's right in front of you. How do the most successful scientists achieve greatness?" Jarvis: "Given your history, drinking copious amounts of alcohol and cavorting with loose women."
3. Frost: "What do you think of my research?" Wilkes: "I think you're a mass murderer of rats."
4. Dottie: "What can I say? I'm a giver." Carter: "Just so we're clear I know you'll try to run and I'm prepared for it." Dottie: "Just so we're clear I know your deportation offer is a lie and you can never be fully prepared for me." Carter: "Then we're in agreement. You'll help me get what I need and then I'll lock you back up in this cell."
5. Sousa: "So she's a real crazy." Carter: "She's a genius." Sousa: "Can you decipher it?" Carter: "I don't speak megalomaniac. Fortunately Howard Stark does."
6. Stark: "What am I doing wrong, Jarvis?" Jarvis: "Sir, we are standing before an incomprehensible rip in the fabric of our world. Use a 7 iron."
7. Stark: "Jarvis, you just hit a woman with my car." Jarvis: "I know, sir." Stark: "She's a two-time Oscar nominee." Jarvis: "Miss Frost is quite resilient. She's fine. Trust me."
8. Ana: "Careful what you ask me. I've had just enough wine that I might answer honestly."
The Big Bang Theory - 9.16 / 9.17 - The Positive Negative Reaction / The Celebration Experimentation
I'm not sure we needed an entire episode devoted to people saying nice things about Sheldon but since he does get and give his fair share of abuse, it was a nice switch up. Too bad it started dragging in the middle. I actually preferred the previous one about Bernadette's pregnancy better even though I laughed more in the second one and it had better references. West not knowing that Affleck was going to be the new Batman made me chuckle but Penny's bathroom Comic-Con line was the clear dialogue winner. Still 9.16 had more heart and was more relatable than most episodes are. The idea of parenthood is enough to scare anyone into wondering if they are prepared for it. I thought Bernadette rocked this episode and yet it was Howard that made the most growth. I adore that he has come up with a new patent idea just to be able to support his child more. It should be interesting to see how a baby changes the dynamics of the show. I'm guessing Stuart will be called to babysit a lot.
Grade: B / B-
Best Reason to Watch - lots of heartfelt moments
Best Awww Scene - Bernadette tells Howard she's pregnant via Post-It notes
Best Friend - Penny offers to stay in the bathroom with Sheldon throughout the party
Best Speech - Wil Wheaton's toast to Sheldon on his birthday
Best Montage / Most Funny - karaoke
Most Cringeworthy - Barry hitting on Leonard's mom in front of him
Biggest Awww Moment - Leonard calls Sheldon his brother
The "Poor Baby" Award - no one ever tells Stuart anything
Best Guest Star - Adam West
The "Welcome Back" Award (character/person ) - Wil Wheaton, Leslie Winkle, Stephen Hawking, Beverly
Best Quotes -
1. Penny: "Hey, you want to just bring a few people in here? You know Wil Wheaton in the bathtub. Batman on the toilet. It will be like the weirdest Comic-Con together."
2. Howard: "Okay, how about this for an invention? Slightly bigger cocktail umbrellas." Leonard: "How is that a new invention?" Howard: "I don't know. All Apple does is change the size of things and we keep buying them."
3. Howard: "Maybe that's an idea. Guidance systems for drunk people." Raj: "They have that. It's called Uber."
4. Leonard: "You know what we should do?" Sheldon: "All get vasectomies so this doesn't happen to us?" Leonard: "Go out and celebrate. But not your worst idea."
5. Amy: "How do you feel about balloons?" Sheldon: "Mylar balloons, yes. Latex balloons, no. water balloons, I will jump off the roof and aim for your car."
6. West: "I never had to say 'I'm Batman'. I showed up. People knew I was Batman."
CSI: Cyber - (2.14-2.17)
I like Cyber but marathoning it, especially right after marathoning Major Crimes and Rizzoli & Isles really points out its flaws. Major events happen in one episode and then never are mentioned again. Hello, death of Python…maybe. I still don't know if it happened or if it was all just a dream. What's up with that? Or subplots are suddenly dropped in, forgotten for several episodes, and just when you forgot that they ever existed, come back to take up space. Looking at you Nina stalker subplot. It's to the point where I'm not sure if they are airing the episodes out of order or if the writers simply don't talk to each other and the show runner is on an extended holiday. Good thing I kind of care about many of the characters or else I would have been gone a long time ago. As it is, I'm just playing out the string until this show is cancelled.
Grade: C-
Best Reason to Watch - Nelson is free but the program is in jeopardy
Tech to Fear of the Week - the government's almost limitless ability to track where you are and what you do via the internet if even half of these plots are true
Best Action - Elijah vs. Vega
Best Twist - DB and Avery are talking about a ping pong match
Best Bud - Krumitz , who helps Nelson with the paperwork even though he won the bet
Worst Plan - killing Grace to save her
Worst Job - sorting through the worst of the internet
Least Interesting - Elijah's stalker Nina subplot is back and really, really boring
Least Logical - Why exactly do people wait until CTEC flies to their city before they have the police enter the crime scene? This will never ever make any sense.
Most Diabolical - Python drives right by Elijah, knowing that he can't pursue her and save Grace too
Most Surprising - DB has never been to Paris
Most Right - Raven when she tells Nelson that Avery will NOT put his interests first, which she knows because Avery was a witch to her at her probation hearing
Biggest Rip-Off of Se7en - Sasha kills the vice violators and then plans to use herself as the example of the last one
Biggest Facepalm - DB picks up the bag with the head in it with his bare hands, no gloves - Arggghhhh!
Biggest Awww Moment - Avery and Grace's mom reunite
Biggest Hmm - So, they aren't going to do anything about dead or mostly dead guy Vega was torturing?
Dumbest Criminals - the teen girls who are so busy trying to be famous that they get themselves trapped
The "Say What?" Award - THAT's the end of Python? Really? How anticlimactic!
The "I'm with You" Award - Nelson calling out Avery about Raven was exactly in line given that the circumstances are ultimately the same
The "Please Stay Lost" Award - Nina and Fake Grandpa
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Vega / Greer
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Gabriel Tigerman aka Andy on Supernatural
Best Quotes -
1. DB: "So in a way they do invoke the trolls of Scandinavian folklore. They're antisocial. They're angry, dimwitted creatures that make life difficult for traveling." Raven: "Jerks."
2. Avery: "What happened?" Elijah: "Uh, we had a small disagreement. We talked it through, came to a mutual understanding. Right, Miguel?"
3. Avery: "I would have helped you." Nelson: "Really, Avery? 'Cause I saw how much you helped Raven."
4. Krumitz: "You know I remember the good old days when criminals would just stash their loot and lay low. Now they make videos bragging about it and social media turns them into online celebrities with thousands of followers." Avery: "Keeping up with the Kardashians is expensive. They just turned to crime to do it."
5. Nelson: "What? A brother can't binge watch a little History Channel at night?"
How to Get Away with Murder - 2.13 - Something Bad Happened
This show definitely knows how to end on a cliffhanger to woo the audience back for another week. While it was clear that Phillip was going to be the one hiding in Wes' apartment, it still made my heart race when he snatched Annalise's leg. Going to the police about Phillip was a bold move also, which is bound to make the cat and mouse game even more entertaining. Now the police at least have some solid evidence in which to start looking even if they cannot use the tape as evidence. I'm still glad Sinclair got offed but having the police a half step behind Team Keating makes everything more intense. What isn't exciting me? Laurel and Wes - yes I know they have both been through a lot and I still don't care. I don't even mean as a couple, which is eye-rollingly bad in itself. I mean Wes and the therapist is supposed to make me feel nervous about what he might reveal but it really just makes me more exasperated with the character. He's so whiny and woe is me that every time he's on screen I just want him off. Even worse, he's dragging Laurel into the pit too. If I hear her whine about how Annalise is treating Wes one more time, there won't be enough socks in the world. Plus if she would stop snapping at Frank and ask the right questions, maybe the audience could find out what compelled Frank to kill Lila for Sam in the first place. That's far more interesting than most of the emoangsting going on in the present timeline.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch - the DA is now involved
Best Character Interaction - Bonnie and Frank
Best Cliffhanger - Phillip grabs Annalise
Biggest Missed Opportunity - the sleepover deserved more time than Laurel whining did
Biggest Say What? - So Annalise doesn't think she's bisexual? Huh? I don't get it.
Most Prepared - Apparently Annalise, Bonnie, and Frank have a contingency plan for everything. Bonnie and Frank didn't even blink when Annalise told them to shred everything. They automatically knew what her real plan was and executed it flawlessly.
Most Annoying - Laurel, for the first time
Most Evil - the murderer's father who is actually probably the murderer instead of the kid
Most Intriguing - Bonnie and Frank refer to themselves as having blood on their hands and it sounds like they are talking way before Lila's murder
Smartest Move - Annalise tricks the DA into invalidating any future search warrant
Best Quotes -
1. Oliver: "There was an opt-out option for this little slumber party." Connor: "Nope, because I didn't feel like letting you get murdered tonight."
2. Bonnie: "Let's not talk about them tonight, okay? We had lives before them." Frank: "Way better lives." Bonnie: "Right." Frank: "Okay maybe not way better but…" Bonnie: "We were covered in blood at least. To the end." Frank: "To the end."
3. Annalise: "Everything in that house turned into fruit of the poisonous tree the second your officers entered it illegally so you've got 2 options. Either I sue your a** for abuse of authority or you give me immunity and get the evidence you want from this computer."
4. Eve: "I'm out on a limb here too, Annalise." Annalise: "Exactly, that's why the less you know the better." Eve: "Right. That should be your motto."
5. Frank: "To the end, however it comes first - Phillip's knife or the Feds throwing us in jail."
Major Crimes - (4.11-4.22)
I was way behind on Major Crimes so I took the column hiatus to catch up and I'm glad I did. Unlike most Major Crimes fans, I don't care a jot about Sharon and Andy's relationship so on one level Andy's health issues were mostly meh to me. (If I am going to root for a romance, it's going to be Provenza and Patrice because they are funny.) However I still very much care for the character of Andy individually, so I like seeing his struggle for independence. I am also okay with Rusty's moral dilemma over his Slider interviews even if I've heard a lot of fans say they are tired of the whole case. I'm more tired of his mama drama. For me, it was interesting to see him try to understand how Slider got the way he did. It screams of a start at balanced journalism, something the whole world could use more of. In the end though, my interest in the episodes generally equaled my interest in the case of the week. The one with the kidnapped daughter was powerful and ended so abruptly that it left me feeling jarred into the next episode, while the battered wife one brought up so much gray area that I was left with the same confusion about how to proceed that Hobbs was. I was less impressed by the ones with the mother who hated her son-in-law, the apartment sadist, and the diamond heist. The worst though was the psycho film major. I'm not sure if it was because it starred Perry from Stalker in the exact same role, albeit more stupid here, or if it was just way over-the-top. Still the best part of the marathon is the 5-part story arc, which has gotten really intriguing. I love how there are several viable suspects so the story can go in any direction and it's taking on hot button issues without preaching about them. Major Crimes has a delicate hand when it comes to balancing humor and drama, character development and plot, and multiple themes. It's one of the reasons why the show sticks out from a million other procedural dramas.
Grade (overall) - B+
Best Snark - Judge Grove / Provenza
Best Legal Advice - Lawyer: "Just shut up."
Best Reaction - Provenza and Buzz to hearing that Rusty's mom's boyfriend threatened to hurt him
Worst Plan - not telling Sharon
Worst Punishment - making Andy watch 3 seasons of reality TV
Worst Bedside Manner - Andy's doctor
Least Believable - that any part of the reality TV drive would not be televised by a billion cameras
Most Likely to Make a Molehill Out of a Mountain - Andy
Most Deserving of Being Called to the Carpet - Rusty for not telling Sharon about his life being threatened
Most Obnoxiously Peppy - Andy's PT nurse
Biggest Laugh - Provenza treats Andy's love confession like a criminal confession / Provenza checking off wedding to-do items during the investigation
Biggest Douche - Jack Raydor
The "Poor Baby" Award - Julio has to relive his wife's car accident through a complete douche who didn't care about his own wife / the hustler in county lockup who doesn't realize he's been raped because he doesn't think he counts
The "I'm with You" Award - I don't get pumpkin soup either, Provenza
The "It Warms My Heart" Award - I love how Rusty calls Sharon "mom"
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Patrice / Dr. Joe / Fritz
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Jasika Nicole from Fringe - I miss Astrid / Lauren Stamile from Burn Notice / Brittany Ishibashi from Supernatural's Ghostfacers / Michael McMillian from What I Like About You / Brooke Nevin who was Kat on Supernatural and recently on Scorpion / Romy Rosemont from Glee / Christina Vidal from Code Black / Daniella Alonso from Revolution / Erik Stocklin from Stalker / Arjay Smith from Perception / Jason Gedrick from the 80's / Curtis Armstrong from Supernatural
Best Quotes -
1. Mitzy: "Hey, you can't cut me off from the world like that." Julio: "The world wants a break, ma'am."
2. Provenza: "I say we draw straws. Short one gets to shoot him." Andy: "It's not worth wasting a bullet." Julio: "I'll donate one."
3. Taylor: "What? The baby did it?" Provenza: "Well it's new. It's never the baby."
4. Tao: "Now to make this fun…" Provenza: "Too late."
5. Mark: "When are you guys gonna stop hating me and start hating the bad guys?" Andy: "You are the bad guys."
6. Julio: "So the way he talked about his wife, that was just an act?" Chip: "No, they are awful, hateful people with absolutely no redeemable qualities whatsoever but our audience loves to hate them."
7. Provenza: "Look, I've already missed most of Jeopardy. Let's not have this spill over into the Wheel."
8. Provenza: "Oh and congratulations, Sykes. You've ruined a perfectly good suicide."
9. Provenza: "Oh so there's actually a script." Colleen: "Of course, silly. Reality doesn't just happen."
Rizzoli & Isles - (6.14-6.17)
Like Major Crimes, I tend to like the episodes in this mini-marathon based on the case of the week more than because of what is happening to the characters. Not to say that the character interaction is less important. It's actually the best thing about this show. More that when they allow the characters to evolve through the case, it feels less heavy handed. However, this show gets big time bonus points for carry through. If something happens to a character, it is still happening in the next episode. Maybe that's why the case is the deciding factor for me in this mini-marathon. The characters are dealing with the same issues throughout all of these episodes. My favorite episode of the bunch is 6.17 because that one puts Korsak in jeopardy. Maura and Jane always seem to be in danger but it's rarer with Korsak. Watching him break down while standing on an active mine was heartbreaking and impressive acting. I love how Jane refused to leave his side as well because we got to see her try to be strong for him but also be terrified of the situation. Kudos all around for the acting here. Rizzoli & Isles does a great job of allowing its female characters to be both strong and vulnerable. It was great to see the same courtesy extended to Korsak. It also spurred him to examine his life and marriage to Kiki. For awhile I was worried just like Korsak when Kiki said she needed time but the character shined through as a strong support system for him.
Grade: B (overall) / B+ for 6.17
Best Episode - 6.17
Best Reason to Watch - great character interactions and forward movement on Jane's stalker
Best "Poor Baby" Scene - Korsak breaks down to Jane while standing on the land mine
Best Boss - Korsak, who talks down Jane and pep talks Nina
Best Fiancée - Kiki
Best Laugh - Korsak with the guy buying medical marijuana
Best Office Story - Maura and Kent getting high because the ventilation fan is malfunctioning
Best Save - everyone who kept Korsak safe from the bomb
Best Bonding - Jane and Korsak
Best Sibling Moment - Frankie tries to literally sweep Jane out of his apartment
Best Pep Talk - Korsak inadvertently gets Angela to agree to go to Paris
Best Aww Moment - Maura pep talks Jane about the hacker / Maura's poem
Best New Character - Latvian masseuse, Katrin Ulmanis
Best Back Story - Korsak almost retired from the force due to his first divorce
Best Mom Moment - Angela tells Maura how much she cares about her and encourages Maura to talk
Worst Attempt at Subtle - Maura over Korsak's ring
Worst Twist - Korsak standing on a minefield
Most Likely to Follow Stephen Covey - Maura and her big rocks and water demonstration
Most Loyal - Jane
Most Likely to be Featured on Laffy Taffy - Maura's science puns
Most Enthusiastic - Jane over the tazer
Biggest Tease - Maura loves…glazed doughnuts
Strangest Nightmare - granted those boots are hideous but they are not nightmare-worthy
The "Cat in a Horror Story" Award - that freaking tea pot whistles and everyone jumps
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Martinez / Bryce / Ron
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Chad Lowe from Life Goes On / Lisa Brenner from Perception and my favorite Leverage episode
Best Quotes -
1. Jane: "This spoils my experience of nature." Maura: "You hate nature." Jane: "Well I would like it a lot more if there were fewer dead people in it."
2. Korsak: "It's fake. He was trying to pass a clothesline off as det cord." Jane: "Well if you know that, why'd you tell me to leave?" Korsak: "Cause I could have been wrong."
3. Jane: "It's all fun and games until someone ends up in tears…or looking like the Elephant Man. Bye."
4. Korsak: "You want to be my Best Man, so to speak?" Jane: "Well do I have to throw you a Bachelor Party 'cause I'm in for poker. You know, not so much on the strippers."
5. Korsak: "You're going undercover. You're not going on vacation."
6. Jane: "I plan. My plan is to stop your plan of retiring."
The Shannara Chronicles - (1.05-1.10)
There are many, many things to like about The Shannara Chronicles. Once the quest actually starts (yes it takes forever for that), the pacing improves tenfold and the story rockets from one fantasy epic hero journey staple to another. The required stumbling blocks to fulfill the quest are varied, entertaining, and often feel less like plot devices than they really are. While there is nothing new to this story except the technology backdrop, it's a great ride. Except for the love triangle. Ugh, the love triangle. It is prevalent in every single episode once the three leads meet and it's every bit as annoying as all love triangles are. It halts momentum when it should be speeding along, causes two girls to fight over a man, and adds friction where it does not need to be. What it doesn't do, surprisingly, is keep the two females from forming a bond between each other too. This and the fact that both girls are twice the kick butt warrior that their crush does keeps the love triangle from being a deal breaker for me (which is saying a lot). And these two women do kick butt. Eretria is especially an intriguing character and she has the best character arc, although all three leads grow as do most of the secondary characters. Amberle is too much of a super special snowflake for me but she's also the first one who refuses to leave without Eretria. That stubbornness gels the trio into a decent monster-fighting team that doesn't let the love triangle get in the way of saving each other over and over again. The first 3 episodes are hard to sit through but if you like high fantasy tales give it until the 5th one. It might surprise you how much the characters grow on you too.
Grade: B- (last half) / C (first half)
Best Reason to Watch - decent quest storyline with all the epic fantasy trappings
MVP - still the cinematography
Best Character - Eretria, by far
Best Move - Allanon beheads the Dagda Mor
Best Aww Moment - Cephelo dies helping Eretria escape
Best Plan - using the nuclear waste/toxic fallout to kill the demon
Best Sign - the finale ends with To Be Continued so hope springs eternal
Best Interpretation of the Maze Runner - Amberle and Wil when trying to find Eretria
Best Speech - The Dagda Mor: "Kill. Them. All." It's short, uncomplicated, and everyone understands the plan.
Worst Pep Talk - Allanon: "Don't fail." / Tilton: "Don't die."
Worst Sounding Family - Daughter of the Armageddon. Yeah, not planning to join that group.
Worst Genre Trope - creepy kid
Worst Teen Trope - love triangle
Worst Destiny - Bandon gets to be the next druid. Yippee for him because Allanon makes it look so pleasant.
Dumbest Plan - sounding the horn to announce your arrival…to the bad guys
Most Intriguing - how they intersperse our current technology with the magic of the realm
Most Improved / Least Trustworthy - Cephelo
Least Nostalgic - Eretria
Biggest Facepalm - When the guy you are crushing on says that he's hearing a demon's voice inside his head, the same demon that wants to kill you all and take over the world, it's probably not the best time to screw that guy. Come on, Catania. Use that brain.
Biggest Laugh - the first show in the post-apocalypse is Star Trek
Biggest Hero / Most Kick Butt - Eretria, who sacrifices herself to keep Amberle and Wil safe
Biggest Idiot - the elf that lost his ear / Pike wasting his bullets on target practice / Catania
Biggest What the Heck? - You're hiding in a cave, surrounded by thousands of demons. You are the only one who can stop the demon horde by getting yourself home. If you fail, everyone on the entire planet dies. What do you do? Have one person stand watch so no demons come to kill you? Nah. Screw each other of course. I can't even. I'm done.
Biggest What the Heck?, Part 2 - Your people are dying by the second. Your defenses are falling. The Big Bad is kicking in the door. Now is the very best time for a long emoangsty conversation with your boyfriend. Yep, good plan.
The "That's What Happens When You Screw Your Brother's Girlfriend" Award - he stabs said girlfriend when he comes back as a demon and you're forced to kill him
The "Oh Heck No" Award - Exactly why do Eretria and Amberle need Wil to save them? They are more kick butt than he'll ever be.
The "Er, I Don't Get It Either" Award - Wil, I share your confusion. Girls don't become trees every day. You can be excused for thinking this whole thing is batty.
The "How the Great have Fallen" Award - Oh Bandon, and here I thought you would end up my favorite
The "Yeah, Not a Good Sign" Award - Wil, what does it mean when someone says Eretria's blood is the key? It means nothing good for Eretria.
Best Quotes -
1. Cephelo: "Hate to break up the honeymoon but I'd really like to get the hell out of here."
2. Eretria: "Anyone else have a problem with this plan?" Wil: "Following a creepy kid through an abandoned fortress? Not at all."
3. Wil: "Allanon, perfect timing as usual." Allanon: "I wish I could say the same for you, but the idea was to get here before the demons arrived." Wil: "See. Told you he'd be happy to see us."
4. Arion: "I'm willing to bet they're not expecting two idiot princes to fly in there solo." Andon: "We've got that to our advantage."
5. Allanon: "Only a king knows the weight of a crown. Thirty years ago I stood on a very similar circumstances beside your father." Andon: "Did you have any words of inspiration for him?" Allanon: "Don't fail."
6. Cephelo: "Time for Plan B." Wil: "Which is?" Cephelo: "Run."
Teen Wolf - 5.18 - Maid of Gevaudan
Teen Wolf just can't do flashback episodes. Every time it is drawn out exposition starring characters we normally don't know and care even less about. They dialogue is often atrocious too with too little time spent on the present day tie-ins. While it was fun to see Crystal Reed back on the screen, that hideous French accent needed to go…big time. Even worse, much of the plot points don't make sense even after seeing the season finale. Why in the world is Marcel abetting Sebastian in the first place? The episode doesn't even kick in until the last 10 minutes, making the whole thing skippable as long as you watch the previouslies in the later episodes.
Grade: C-
Best Reason to Watch / Best Action - library fight
Best Scene - Marie kills her brother / students find out Scott's a werewolf
Best Twist - Sebastian is La Bête
Best Possibility - Lydia could be the new Maid of Gevaudan
Best Slide into Home - Marie as she goes for the sword
Worst Accent - Crystal Reed
Most Dramatic Unveiling Since Liam Took Off His Helmet in 4.01 - Marie puts down her hood
Most Likely to Inspire Me to Put an Ice Pick Through My Eyes - Gerard's voiceovers
Biggest Huh? - So is Marcel the hellhound and the cellar is Gevaudan's version of the nematon?
Biggest Problem - sheer boredom unrelieved by Coach humor, Stiles snark, Sheriff or Mama McCall competence, Malia importance, Theo conniving, or a plot that makes sense
Biggest Laugh - still Smoky La Bête CGI
Weirdest Remake - Save Tonight by Zayde Wolf
The "You Give AARP a Bad Name" Award - Gerard, aka Grandpa Evil
The "Say What?" Award - So you're telling me that Sebastian became La Bête because he drank "rainwater from the paw print of a wolf"? What the heck kind of nonsense is that?
The "Welcome Back" Award - Crystal Reed, formerly known as Allison
Best Quotes -
1. Hayden: "Okay, okay, what do you guys usually do when this happens?" Stiles: "Oh, I usually pass out. Still might do that."
2. Henri: "I have spent half a lifetime gathering the implements and skills to survive a werewolf. I can teach you if you want to know." Marie: "I do not care about surviving one. I want to know how to kill one."
3. Argent: "Because as much as we believe Parrish could take on the beast, neither of us think he's our only hope at stopping it." Lydia: "What do you mean?" Argent: "We think there's another." Gerard: "You."
4. Marie: "I hunt animals, not rumors."
5. Malia: "Braeden, it's me. I'm at the school and we need you. Bring your shotgun. Bring all your shotguns."
Teen Wolf - 5.19 - The Beast of Beacon Hills
And we're waiting. And we're waiting. And no one's doing anything. And we're waiting. Welcome to Teen Wolf - The Waiting Game. Like most Teen Wolf penultimate episodes, this one was long on set up and short on delivery. We've taken our characters to the brink of…to be continued next week, where I am sure that despite being told Mason could never, ever survive at least once every episode, he will with help from Lydia, Parrish, and Liam. In this episode though, we wait. Luckily Stiles returns to his roots as comic relief so there's some in-flight entertainment to break up the boredom. See Stiles drop a gun. See Stiles walk into walls. See Stiles sleep awkwardly on his dad's office couch. It's funnier than it sounds. Well, not the middle one and yet it is better than the alternative of watching Sheriff stare at his full moon wall art. It's not all tedium though. We do get two significant wins for the fandom. La Bête takes down the steampunk scientists in such a way that if they do come back, I give up. Plus Theo takes out Douchey for his power. I'm calling both a victory. Only Gerard and Duke to go - after Duke kills off Theo of course. Mason's turning into La Bête was intriguing as well and we have confirmation that the Argents are looking for the pike as predicted on the podcast. The MVP though goes straight to Braeden, who continues to steal every single scene she's in. She's also the one with a working plan that does not include a convoluted twist of a dozen people running around town like lunatics but does include but shells. Simple and effective. Too bad she traps Desert Wolf in the house with Malia. Even worse, the entire fight takes place and Malia doesn't even come downstairs. Urgh!
Grade: C
Best Reason to Watch - everything is set for the finale
Best Action - Braeden vs. Desert Wolf
Best Reaction - Braeden to Malia whining
Best Snark - Stiles
Best Plan - Braeden's nut shell intruder alarm system
Worst Plan - steampunk scientists, unless their plan all along was to create a beast that kills them
Worst Employee Retention Program - Providing actually decent health care is so first term Obama. In Beacon Hills, the police just slash your tires to keep you from quitting your job.
Worst Nickname - So the guy who created the helmet was called the surgeon? Wouldn't the engineer be a better fit?
Biggest Facepalm - they keep punching the steampunk scientists in the helmet where it is bound to have zero effect
Biggest Lecture - a steampunk scientist schools Theo
Biggest Liar - Parrish, who promised he would go but isn't even gone one episode
Biggest Laugh - Stiles drops the gun
Biggest Stalker - Screamer, who needs to go
Biggest Miracle - Kira and Scott are together on a bed and it does NOT turn into a sex scene
Most Irritating - What? It's not Gerard. Look at you taking the crown, Deucalion.
Most Likely to Kill You just for the Sport of It - Tracey, who actually would make a good padawan for the Desert Wolf
Most Likely to Get a Bad Deal - Kira with the skinwalkers
Least Surprising - A full moon is coming soon…in Beacon Hills. Go figure.
The "Poor Baby" Award - Mama McCall's house
The "I'm with You" Award - For once, Liam, I agree with you. There is a thin line between desperate and stupid and I think the pack crossed it.
The "Welcome Back" Award - HistoryDad
Best Quotes -
1. Stiles (after being woken up from a nap): "What? What happened? Who's dead?"
2. Stiles: "Still nothing from Scott and Liam." Lydia: "Are we sure this is a good idea?" Stiles: "Uh…no, no one thinks this is a good idea." Sheriff: "But you're trusting Theo anyway?" Stiles: "We're not trusting him. We're using him." Lydia: "What if he's using us?" Stiles: "Yeah well, that's probably a given."
3. Theo: "We all want the same thing. We want Mason back." Scott: "Yeah but the difference is that we want him back alive." Theo: "Well I'm open to compromise."
4. Malia: "You know how my mother wants to kill me. I think she might want to kill you too." Stiles: "Okay…uh, that's disconcerting. I should probably have a gun." Braeden: "I'm not giving you a gun." Stiles: "You have a gun. The Desert Wolf who is trying to kill me has a gun. I think I should probably have a gun. (Braeden tosses him a gun and he drops it.) I probably shouldn't have a gun."
5. HistoryDad: "As your father I'm obliged to warn you, this is dangerous." Kira: "As my father, I was hoping you wouldn't tell my mother." HistoryDad: "That's dangerous too."
6. Lydia: "Anything on your end?" Malia: "Not a thing and I'm going to lose my mind if I don't get out of this supernatural cage." Lydia: "The mountain ash is there to keep you safe." Malia: "I should be keeping Stiles safe."
7. Parrish: "I can't stay. I'm a hellhound. I have the word hell in my name. Hell." Sheriff: "You're also one of my best deputies."
Teen Wolf - 5.20 - Apotheosis
As most Teen Wolf finales, it's better the first time around before logic can catch up to the breakneck pace. Still this episode is packed with fun…and a few disappointments. The action, twists, and pacing are fantastic. It's jam packed but not too crowded and ties up several loose ends. Plus every single character on screen had a job to help save the others and the town. Even the dead get a chance to save on this show. Nice work on making Allison important again, by the way. No one felt superfluous except Screamer. I now officially dislike him as much as Liam, who at least did something instead of hiding and watching. Ugh! We also got rid of the steampunk scientists and hopefully Tracy for good while Theo went bye bye for at least a season. All of which are great things. Sadly, no one else died though. Seriously, every single main character on this show bleed from a possibly fatal wound and viola, they're all magically healed with no scarring and the barest hint of any mental trauma. What is with this show and conveniently forgetting what the characters have gone through whenever they don't want to deal with it? It gets frustrating…but it does leave for a happy ending. I'm a big fan of the ending montage that reminds me so much of 3A. It's nice to see the characters able to relax and just do normal things together instead of ending on a giant cliffhanger. I wish more shows would do this.
Grade: B+
MVP - music / action
Best Reason to Watch - all the twists and the action
Best Scene - Desert Wolf fight / ending in the library
Best Moment - Lydia and Malia join arms and go into school
Best Timing - Stiles' texts let Sheriff know that Sebastian in front of him is La Bête
Best Question - Liam, I don't get how Mason can become a 200 year old French guy either? Welcome to Ye Olde Plot Device.
Best Music - Fight 'Til the End by Jack Savoretti
Biggest What the Heck? - Why in the world would Marcel want to bring Sebastian back? What hold does Sebastian have over him? Nothing is explained in the back story of these two characters.
Biggest Ho Hum - like Scott the berserker before him, we see Mason as La Bête for so short a time that it's like a side note
Biggest Coward - Screamer, who hides in the walls until Mason is free
Most Irksome Since Liam Became a Beta - Hayden becomes Scott's beta
The "Maybe They ARE Competent" Award - I've given the Beacon Hills Memorial Hospital a lot of flack over the years but if Stiles and Lydia are any way to judge, they must be more than competent. Lydia had her throat slashed. Stiles was stabbed near the heart with a huge piece of glass. Yet, they are both fine and studying at school with no sign of trauma or discomfort afterwards. That's some magical healing. Is HotDoc a witch?
The "Say What?" Award - So according to this wonky werewolf canon every time Lydia says Scott's name when he's in werewolf form, it should turn him human again. Hmm.
Best Quotes -
1. Desert Wolf: "I want my power back." Malia: "I want my family back."
2. Stiles: "Okay, is it Plan B?" Scott: "It was Plan A." Stiles: "Plan A never works." Scott: "This one will."
3. Scott: "Hayden, we can still take you to the hospital." Hayden: "I've already died there once."
4. Scott: "Liam, wait. We can still save Mason." Liam: "Well who's going to save you?" Sebastian: "What kind of werewolves are you?"
5. Sebastian: "You seem to know who I am. That means you know what I'm capable of." Sheriff: "I've got some experience."
6. Deaton: "Mason had a vanishing twin." Stiles: "Now we have a vanishing Mason."
Younger - 2.08 - Beyond Therapy
Continuing with the pattern of streamlining the storytelling, this episode focuses mostly on Liza and Kelsey's life choices and how they affect others around them. It all starts with a bidding war on a therapist's new book. Played by Camryn Manheim, the therapist specializes in getting millennials to stop being stuck in their life track and forge a path ahead to best fulfill their goals. Upon meeting the therapist, Kelsey takes a long look at her life and realizes that Thad is a douchey manchild. I actually cheered when Kelsey decides to cut the cord and find a new partner. It' about time…except it doesn't last. Kelsey. You were doing so well before acepting his marriage proposal. Meanwhile Liza turns into the worst girlfriend when Josh is honored by the New York Times as a creative young artist. It's a big deal but Liza is afraid her secret will get out so she plays least in sight. Josh, still uncomfortable with lying, acts like an adult and is super sweet until he has enough. Even Maggie, who cameos in one scene, thinks Liza is far too laissez faire about Josh's big break and its possible fallout. While I like that this episode bumps both relationships into new material, it is also frustrating because I wanted the exact opposite to happen. Thad needs to go. Josh needs to stay. There's also far too little Maggie but her scene highlights much of Liza's naiveté about who Josh is as a person and what he needs from their relationship. Mostly though I was impressed by Kelsey, whose attitude of self-reflection leads to not only the best scene of the night but possibly also a greater maturity for the character in the future. She's really taking her future to heart and showing a self-confidence that has been missing in her personal life.
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - Kelsey confronts Thad
Best Confession - Liza tells the therapist that she's 40
Best Plan - kicking Thad to the curb
Worst Plan - saying yes to Thad's proposal or basically proposing and accepting after a huge fight instead of giving your selves time to figure out where the problems really lie and if they're fixable
Most Painful - Kelsey yells at Josh
Biggest Product Placement - Olay Regenerist
Biggest Douche - Thad
The "All Bark" Award - Diana comes on like a Devil Wears Prada boss but she's actually got a good heart when it comes to Liza
The "Between a Rock and a Hard Place" Award - Josh, who can't talk about Liza in the magazine article, gets nailed by Kelsey and Laurel for not talking about Liza in the article
The "Welcome Back" Award - Martha Plimpton from Raising Hope / Camryn Manheim from The Practice and Ghost Whisperer
Best Quotes -
1. Liza: "Hey, what do creative directors do exactly?" Maggie: "Other people's coke mostly."
2. Kelsey: "This is the first day of my new timeline and I'm not wasting it whining about the past."
3. Josh: "Actually it's kind of weird. The more I talk to Greta, the more I realize how big a part of my story you actually are." Liza: "Awww." Josh: "Yeah but I can't tell her that so I'm just making stuff up. I think she actually think I'm with Gabe."
4. Kelsey: "He wishes his abs still looked liked that."
5. Liza: "It was a long day in the 20-something minefield."