Brooklyn Nine-Nine - The 9-8 - Review

The 9-9 took in the 9-8 this week, and it turned out to be anything but “noice.” No one was particularly excited about making room in the precinct to house a whole other precinct, but Jake’s attitude quickly turned around when he saw his old friend Stevie “Chillin’” Schillens (played by the hilarious Damon Wayans Jr.). The two were partners back when they were beat cops, and naturally they called themselves the Beatsie Boys. Boyle immediately gets jealous of Jake and Stevie’s close bond and is worried that Stevie’s going to ruin his bestfriendship with Jake when he invites himself along on their stakeout. Stevie’s been tracking one of the dealers who just took a job at the bar the detectives are planning to stakeout, so Jake feels like his knowledge will be helpful to the investigation. Boyle’s not happy about, but they all go to stake out the bar…except Jake and Stevie kind of forget to bring Boyle along. So they go back and get him, and then they all stakeout the bar. (Under the new name chosen by Boyle, “Police Pals.”)

Boyle and Jake originally planned to observe for a while and gather enough evidence to build a case, but when Stevie sees someone he knows buys from the dealer, he wants to move in. Jake agrees and the three bust into the bar to find…nothing. It looks like they totally blew the case until Boyle spots someone in the bar that he arrested a month before, and Jake realizes that consorting with felons is a parole violation which gives them ground to search the dealer’s apartment. But again, they can’t find any drugs. That is, until Stevie manages to find some in the dishwasher. Back at the precinct Boyle pulls Jake aside and lets him know that he checked the dishwasher before Stevie and there was nothing in there -- Stevie planted the drugs. Jake pulls Stevie into the smallest closet available and confronts him about it. Stevie admits he planted them, because he knew the dealer was dirty and didn’t want him to get away. When Jake says he’s going to report him, Stevie Donkey Kong punches him (there’s no room for regular punches), and then Boyle wiggles his way into the room and joins in. Jake chases Stevie through the precinct (once they get free of the closet), and while he’s arresting him they start a complete brawl between the 9-9 and the 9-8 officers. After the brawl comes to a close and everyone gets a good talking-to from Holt, Boyle and Jake transport the handcuffed Stevie while they sing “Unbreak My Heart.” Even Stevie joins in, and the three belt out some Braxton together.

From the moment Stevie appeared in the Nine-Nine, it was clear why he and Jake were friends. They are both fun, hoodie-wearing, goofy cops who love a movie-worthy police drama. But just because they’re similar doesn’t mean that they make the best partners -- they both want to bust in and make an epic arrest, when the case might call for a boring but necessary stake-out. This is why Boyle and Jake are great partners and friends; in a lot of ways they help balance each other out. They’re both crazy, of course, but in different enough ways that they complement each other. In a nice touch, when Jake accused Boyle of being jealous of Stevie, he fully admitted that he was, and he wasn’t trying to hide it. But he wasn’t trying to take him down because of jealousy, he just couldn’t allow Stevie to break the law, even if it was to put away someone they knew was guilty. And to Jake’s credit he trusted Boyle’s accusation and confronted Stevie about it. Although we might not get to see Stevie as a cop again after his evidence planting, maybe we’ll get to see some more flashbacks to the Beatsie Boys days.

While Jake’s time with Stevie goes from good to bad, the rest of the precinct’s experience with the 9-8ers goes from bad to worse. Amy and Rosa have a hard time dealing with their new desk mates. Amy’s has a bogus service dog, and her allergies are making it impossible for her to enjoy her new binder smell. Rosa’s inexplicably brought along a huge collection of porcelain figurines to her temporary workspace. Terry has his computer snatched right off his desk, Scully and Hitchcock can’t stand the long microwave lines, and even Holt is suffering as his office is occupied by the 9-8 captain, who changed the lumbar support on his chair. Only Gina is still thriving, as naturally her 9-8 counterpart is working on the floor by her desk and isn’t allowed to make eye contact with her.

After a frustrated Amy and Rosa head out onto the roof to complain to Terry about their situation, they find Hitchcock and Scully out there with their own, line-free, microwave. Terry realizes that with piles of boxes blocking the windows, no one would even know they were outside. And so they decide to set up their own little office on the roof. Everything’s going smoothly at first -- even the copier’s working! Then Holt and Gina find the outdoor crew. Although Gina wants in on the new Nine-Nine, Holt shames them all with a horrible basketball metaphor (it might be more effective if he knew anything about basketball), and tells them to cooperate with the other precinct. Even though Holt encourages his detectives to make it work, he’s having a hard time doing just that, as Deputy Inspector Flynt has completely taken over his office, and won’t even let him have meetings in there. As Gina points out, Holt does not like other people in his space. When the big brawl breaks out almost everyone gets involved. Rosa breaks a precious porcelain farm girl, Amy puts her deskmate in a headlock, Terry tries to get back his computer but ends up taking down two men, and Scully and Hitchcock eat burritos and watch. (They must have quite the microwave burrito supply, because they were eating them all day.) Holt comes out of his hijacked office to break it up, but not before he takes out one of the heating ducts under the cover of chaos. With the heat no longer working, the 9-8 has to relocate, yet again. Holt admits to Gina and Terry that sometimes you just have to find a creative solution; in this case, freezing the guests out of your office.

It was funny to see the Nine-Niners struggle with the idiosyncrasies of the Nine-Eighters, because even though the latter were pretty weird, the former are pretty weird themselves. I’d be curious to see what the Nine-Eighters thought of their hosts. It was also funny to see the detectives set up their office outside in New York in the middle of winter. I’m not saying it’s not possible, but the little coats they had on would definitely not cut it for more than a couple minutes. Rosa was only wearing a little leather jacket! Hilarious. I would have liked to see them freezing their butts off, but still refusing to go inside because the alternative was worse.

Another great cold open, where Gina auctions off a suitcase that has been in the lost and found for decades.  Jake wins the auction by agreeing to let Gina give him a spray tan and make his clothing and hair choices, so naturally he comes into work looking like an orange alien.  To show how far Holt has come since his arrival and insistence on proper work attire, when Jake goes to explain exactly why he looks so ridiculous, Holt simply waves him away with an "I don't care."

Line of the week goes to Holt for failing to prove his “easy-going” nature to Gina:
“Okay, I once saw you use a ruler to measure another ruler.”
“It was off by half a centimeter, it never should have been in circulation.”

What did you think of the episode? Did you know Stevie was up to no good, or did you think Boyle was just being too jealous? Which pairing do you enjoy the most, the Beatsie Boys or the Police Pals? What did you think of the precinct’s 9-8 office mates? And does anyone else want to know how Holt suspected that the incorrect ruler was, in fact, inaccurate? Can he eyeball exactly 12 inches? Let us know below!

About the Author - Kimberly

Kimberly is a big TV nerd - willing to talk any show, any time. Her tastes are various and sundry, but she’s got a soft spot for comedy. She currently writes the SpoilerTV reviews for Brooklyn Nine-Nine.

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