So far in the six part miniseries revival of The X-Files, we have been introduced to a single overarching mythology episode and one Monster of the Week episode. According to Wikipedia, this season of The X-Files will be split with four different MOTW episodes and only two (the first and last of this series) that center on the mythology. As such, episode three is another MOTW episode that unfortunately leaves quite a bit to be desired.
Rather than taking a pessimistic point of view for the entirety of this article, I figured I’d start off by talking a bit about what I did like (Hint: There isn’t much). The dynamic between Mulder and Scully which was only briefly explored in the first two episodes shines in the third. In the years since the X-Files closed, a lot of the cases that Mulder previously held up as golden examples of the supernatural have been explained away by natural and completely reasonable ideas. As a result, this episode sees Mulder suddenly doubting his past strongly held beliefs. When you think about the recent revelations in regards to his and Scully’s son, Mulder’s newfound doubts make a lot of sense. He’s worked on conspiracy theories for 30+ years with little to nothing to show for it and, despite the greatest of intentions, he has also failed miserably at being a father (see alien baby). Where the dynamic between Mulder and Scully comes into play is when the two switch positions of skeptic and believer. For a lot of this episode, Scully attempts to convince Mulder that maybe something supernatural really is going on, but he is reluctant to return to such ways of thinking. Their scenes work well both in the context of their relationship, their part in this series, and are wholly entertaining. Unfortunately, this is the only thing I found truly interesting in the hour.
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| The X-Files's were-monster (left) and Land of the Lost's Sleestak (right) |
Beyond the great team dynamic, there is not a single other redeeming quality about this episode. First of all, the monster looks like the Sleestak creature from Land of the Lost. The closeup picture that they released makes him look a million times better than he actually is on the screen. With the serious look on his face and the red eyes, I have to say that the picture makes him look like a great monster. Sadly, in action, he is quite possibly the worst supernatural creature I’ve ever seen on television.
This episode also features more than its fair share of idiotic sequences. The worst sequence of this episode is placed inside the dumbest looking motel I’ve ever seen on television. You really have to see it in order to fully understand the stupidity involved, but I felt like The X-Files had somehow morphed into a live action version of Scooby Doo. Characters run around, jump on beds in their underwear, and act completely irrationally. Another includes a therapist who repeatedly tries to sell Mulder some medication and also explain how to defeat this week's monsters.
A few notes and quotes:
Mulder: “They cut off your genitals.”
Scully: "I think I just found your horny toad lizard man."
Scully: “You’re batcrap crazy” (Thank you 8:00 PM network timeslot. Because of you, Dana Scully can’t even say batshit.)
Mulder goes on another rambling monologue where he pulls ideas out of nowhere and sounds completely and totally crazy. While this isn’t unlike Mulder to do, it does get quite tiresome.
I literally jumped out of my chair when the episode was over because I was so happy that it was done. The ending is unbelievably stupid.
Rating: 4.6/10 - I’m pretty sure this is the lowest rating that I’ve ever given an hour of television. In the unfortunate words of Dana Scully, I was not exactly “batcrap crazy” about this episode. If you enjoy over the top acting combined with over the top writing, you will love this episode. If you prefer the more serious episodes of The X-Files, I wouldn't even bother watching it.
Tune in to the third episode of The X-Files 6 part miniseries on Monday, February 1st. Be sure to come back here to SpoilerTV to let everyone else know what you thought of the episode.
