A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.
1. Niylah: "No kill marks?" Clarke: "My back's not big enough."
2. Jaha: "No pain, no hate, no envy." Murphy: "No thanks."
3. Lincoln: "There can't be an us or them if we want to survive." Octavia: "You're being naïve. Most people aren't like you, Lincoln." Lincoln: "Kane and Abby aren't like most people. They're trying to forge a lasting peace and so am I." Octavia: "They're using you. Look at that nice grounder in his uniform. They think it proves we can live together." Lincoln: "It does."
4. Kane: "Bellamy, there hasn't been an attack since Mount Weather. That's 3 months. Our people believe that this is real peace. Try not to screw that up?"
5. Murphy: "Okay, you do know she is the one who launched the bombs that ended the world, right?" Jaha: "Wrong. She didn't end the world. She saved it." Murphy: "I'm so out of here."
6. Clarke: "Your fight is over."
1. Wilkes: "I'm starting to think I'd make a pretty good secret agent." Carter: "Not your best hypothesis."
2. Jarvis: "Is it broken?" Carter: "You'll live. Keep your head back." Jarvis: "Of course I'll live. I'm worried about the aesthetic. Anna's absolutely mad about my profile."
3. Samberly: "The short answer is I don't know. So's the long answer."
4. Thompson: "It's a real burden being everybody's favorite agent, isn't it?" Carter: "If this is about your insecurity, Chief Thompson, then I suggest you deal with it in your own time."
5. Peggy: “Love the hat.”
6. Jarvis: “Aside from Danger, my middle name is Charming.”
7. Jarvis : "That's the sock-on-the-door-knob button."
8. Peggy : "Good Lord, is that a mirror ?"
1. Angie: "I've had 236 partners and I've fallen in love with every single one of them." Geils: "That's so normal."
2. Manhattan: "Believe me, I would have killed him but they don't let people in coach kill people in first class." Angie: "That's true. That's a rule."
3. Daisy: "I can't believe I spent a whole montage with you."
4. Tanner: "Hidden Valley Country Club. Didn't this used to be a ranch?" Geils: "They moved to Thousand Islands."
5. Everett: "His aesthetic was offensive to me. I wanted to embarrass him." Geils: "Well then why didn't you just bully him on Facebook or Instagram like any decent human being?"
6. Atkins: "Meanwhile the plane's been grounded." Angie: "Why?" Atkins: "Got in late. Didn't do its homework."
Chip: “I’ll have the No. 57, please.”
Waiter: “Sir, that’s the price.”
Chip: “Oh, in that case I’ll have No. 4″
Waiter: “A carrot?”
Chip: “Yes, a carrot, please.”
1. Jake: "He's eating snakes! [...] Nope, it's spaghetti." Ray: "It's always spaghetti." Jake: "I'm just saying, if that's spaghetti...it looks like snakes."
2. Amy: "Oh, it's cool, I keep to date on all my vaccinations. I'm immune to stuff you've never even heard of." Ray: "But not immune to braggadocio."
3. Rosa: "I've only had Arlo for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself."
1. Richard: "Hey there old buddy, you know what I believe in." Galavant: "I think we're gonna pull through." Richard: "Me too." Roberta: "Me three." Madalena & Gareth: "Yes, I believe something might just have started." Sid: "And I believe I'll be joining the dear departed." Isabella: "And I believe I have a wedding planner to see. Better believe it. His a** belongs to me."
2. Galavant: "There's no need for your clunky exposition."
3. Sid: "She will rip your heart out and I don't mean symbolically."
4. Roberta: "Listen people, there's no need to fight. Holy freaking cow, you're the same damn height."
1. Noah: "I am...so proud...of you both. So...proud."
1. Snart: "We go out for one lousy drink and you guys somehow manage to pick a fight with Boba Fett."
2. Sarah: "If we have the power to change the world, don't you think we have the power to change our own fate?"
3. Rory: "Whatever you roofied him with, I'd like some." Stein: "I did not roofie him." Rory: "Oh I ain't judging."
4. Snart: "Why did we become criminals?" Rory: "Because we hate working and we love money."
5. Ray: "He's a time master from the 22nd century. It's a little hard to Google."
1. Josh: "You know Rebecca's gonna figure it out, right? The chip on the button? You didn't get that exactly right. Did you seriously think she wouldn't notice?" Brian: "Well, it wasn't exactly optimal circumstances." Josh: "And you were on NZT. To get it right, all you had to do was two seconds of extra effort. She's gonna notice, but maybe that's what you wanted, hmmm? She'll keep poking around, and eventually, maybe, she'll find you." Brian: "Yes, Josh, that's exactly what I want. I wanna get caught committing a felony." Josh: "Things that happen down where I live don't always make sense at first here. Look, you hate your life, lying. Why not make it impossible?" Brian: "It's not just about me. It's my family, Rebecca, all of this will kill them."
2. Naz: "WOULD. YOU. PLEASE. STOP. SHOUTING. ROAD TRIP."
3. Boyle: "Someone played Cowboys and Indians with her. Tickled her 40 times. And then cuddled her with her own unicorn." Rebecca: "Well, the soda pop platter indicates that she was still playing air guitar before she was sent to an awesome farm in the country." Boyle: We've got a serial hugger on our hands."
1. Ken: "You're right, Sylvester. I…we never really connected. I wasn't prepared to raise a kid like you. There's no manual on how to raise a genius. If there were I'd have read it a hundred times cover to cover because I loved you from the moment you were born. I just…I just didn't know how to show you."
2. Sylvester: "You said it was 100 x 20." Happy: "Yeah, it's 100 feet by 20 feet." Sylvester: "I thought you meant meters. This country runs on the metric system. Why didn't you convert?" Happy: "I'm American."
3. Paige: "I swear to God if you don't get into this, I'm gonna kill you myself."
4. Walter: "What you just said makes sense." Happy: "Everything I say makes sense."
1. Woz: "They followed me. The feds." Donnie: "And you thought coming here was a good idea?" Woz: "I lost them, Donnie." Donnie: "If they had anything substantial, you'd be in custody." Woz: "Harlee's the mole. She went into my filing cabinet, then she lied about it. It's Harlee." Donnie: "She made her choice, Matt. Now you need to make yours. Protect your family, lieutenant. Tonight."
2. Woz: "You have a tell." Harlee: "What?" Woz: "You have a tell when you're lying. And you lied to me, Harlee. You lied to me!" Harlee: "Really? A polygraph wasn't enough. I don't need to listen to this." Woz: "You're gonna tell me the whole truth, or I swear to god I'll shoot you right here." Harlee: "Okay. What's my tell? What is this thing that I do that makes you so sure that I'm a fed. mole, that you would kill me?" Woz: "You push you hair behind your ear. I pulled video footage of our first interview. The one where you were lying about Miguel. You did it then, and you did it last night." Harlee: "This is a joke, right?" Woz: "Is it?" Harlee: "Because I did it five minutes ago, and five minutes before that. I've been pushing my hair behind my ear since kindergarten. I also lick my lips, bite my nails, tug at my-" Woz: "Don't, don't! DON'T TWIST THIS AROUND. DON'T!" Harlee: "There's nothing to twist! And what the hell is wrong with you? You know me!" Woz: "I also know the ADA wasn't missing any files, because I dropped them off. You lied to me, you lied to me again!" Harlee: "I lied about that, okay, you know why? Because I was looking for Loman's psych eval." Woz: "Lies, it's just more lies! You're a liar!" Harlee: "No, Loman bashed his clip, and he was trying to turn his gun in. The shooting's messing with his head, Woz. I didn't want to come to you until I knew how bad it was. If you don't believe me, call him! Do it! Or maybe you want something more concrete. You gave me enough leave time for this meeting, made sure I came alone. If I'm the mole, I must have a wire. Here, check my purse. [...] There's a gun. Notice I didn't reach for it. No necklace, no earrings. Must be strapped somewhere." Woz: "What are you doing?" Harlee: "Body's the best place, right?" Woz: "Stop." Harlee: "No. Look at me. LOOK AT ME! It kills me that somebody's trying to hurt you. I'm so sorry this is happening. You know I'd do anything for you." Woz: "Get dressed."
1. Wil: "That's Druid speak for maybe you should reconsider."
2. Ander: "I don't know about you but I'm feeling great about this plan."
3. Bandon: "Seeing death is no gift."
4. Wil: "The details aren't important." Amberle: "He said that you broke into his room and you struggled but you knocked him out." Eretria: "That's one way to put it. You should know that the struggle was mutual and it lasted about an hour."
5. Arion: "It is hard to compete with the ghost of a brother whose stature increases in your mind with every passing year."
6. Wil: "Is this your usual grave look or should I be worried?"
1. Kara: “I know what it’s like to feel isolated and alone. I relive that feeling in my darkest moments, but when I’m with you, I never feel that way. When your dad says he misses you, I believe him, because if you weren’t in my life… I’d be lost too.”
2. Toyman: “Even with all the amazing toys I’ve built. You’re the best thing I ever made.”
Teen Wolf -
1. Scott: "I don't know why I believed him. I don't know why we didn't just keep talking that night. Five more minutes and we would have figured out that there were two different stories. We would have filled in all the blanks. We should have just kept talking." Stiles: "He knew we wouldn't." Scott: "I didn't want it to happen like this." Stiles: "Like what?" Scott: "I knew sooner or later one of us was going to get a little too much blood on our hands. I half-thought that it was going to be Malia." Stiles: "Well she definitely seems like she's working on it." Scott: "I just always thought that if it were to happen, it should be me. I'm the one who's constantly putting you guys in danger, risking your lives for people you don't even know. It should have been me."
2. Stiles: "There was a pin. There was one little, metal pin attached to the scaffolding. He…he was trying to pull me down." Scott: "He was trying to kill you." Stiles: "Yeah, so then I pulled the pin. You know and all these metal braces came down and one of them just went right through him." Scott: "Why didn't you think you could tell me?" Stiles: "It was just the way you were looking at me that night. You know you were just…you were standing there with the wrench in your hand. You were looking at me like I'd just bashed you in the head with it. You know like I'd broken your sacred rule and…that's it. There's no going back." Scott: "I know the difference." Stiles: "What?" Scott: "I know what self-defense is."
3. Scott: "What's happening?" Stiles: "Um, yeah we're out of gas. That's out of gas." Scott: "It says we have half a tank." Stiles: "Yeah, not necessarily." Scott: "You didn't fix the gas gauge did you." Stiles: "Not necessarily."
