Welcome back to Last Week in TV. Sorry this edition is a bit skimpy, mostly because of a hectic week at work but also because I couldn't steel myself to watch this week's Supernatural episode. I hated how cheesy and whiny Lucifer was in season 5 and having him come back just elicits a sigh from me. I will however bite the bullet and watch it soon so it will be in next week's post. Also look for a special post in a couple weeks about the best…and worst of TV in 2015. There's a lot to choose from on both ends of the spectrum and I can't wait to hear your choices too. Until then, don't forget to nominate an episode for me to review by filling out the short 2-question form below. This week's was from Mom and it genuinely shocked me. I had no idea it got that dark in a Chuck Lorre comedy. I will be reviewing Suits next time, a show I dropped fairly early. It will be interesting to see how the characters have changed since then.
In other news, the nominations for Pitch Your Low-Rated Show will be out in 2 weeks. This is a great chance to get others to try your favorite, endangered show during the midseason hiatus. As for me, I will be pitching Galavant for sure and maybe Agent Carter and The 100, depending on how many nominations they get. I'm still hoping that the long break has allowed people to catch up on all 3. Basically any show not in green or blue on the Cancellation Predictor Table is fair game. (Other shows will be fair game for the bigger Pitch Your Show nominations in the summer.) So until next time, be thinking about what you think was the best and worst of TV in 2015 and as always, happy TV viewing.
Nominated Episode
There is very little that shocks me in TV these days and especially not in comedies. Mom totally shocked me. I never expected a comedy to be filled with so much pain and anger, especially in a season premiere. They are definitely not sugarcoating things in this episode, although I'm not sure if that's the norm or not. So much so that this feels not so much like a comedy as a very condensed drama. In short Bonnie's mom, who gave her up to the foster care system when she was 4, tracks her down through a private detective and asks to meet. Bonnie is reluctant but Christy is curious about her grandmother. Eventually Bonnie relents but in 3 sparse scenes, she clues in the audience just how painful the memory of being abandoned was for her. It's powerful acting interrupted by the comedy. Right in the middle of the heartfelt speeches, the show seems to remember they have to meet a laugh quotient or the laugh track goes on strike. It's disjointing to say the least, especially since most of these jokes wouldn't be that funny in a non-serious moment. The humor does totally work outside of the dramatic moments though, giving this episode a case of split-identity. The comedy works really well and the drama is amazing, but the combination of comedy and drama not so much. This episode does make me more curious about the show as a whole though and it is plain to see why Allison Janney is such Emmy fodder for her role. I'm not quite as sold on Christy yet, but I'm sure that will come in time. In the end, I'm still planning on marathoning the first season over summer break but man do they need to get rid of that laugh track!
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - the acting
Best Scene - Christy starts a conversation with the person she thinks is her grandma but is not
Best Character - tie - Marjorie / Non-Grandma
Best Acting - Allison Janney
Best Guest - Ellen Burstyn
Biggest Shock - there's nary a male in this episode except for the kid who comes in at the end
Most Surprising - Non-Grandma is baking cookies at their house in the end
Most Needing to Go - the laugh track, which is noticeable in all comedies but is very much out of place here
Most Intense Scene - Bonnie goes to Shirley's house to forgive her but not to let her into her life again
Strangest Acting Choice - Anna Faris chooses to slouch as Christy. It's not a problem or anything but it is rare to see on TV.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Allison Janney from The West Wing and 10 Things I Hate About You / Mimi Kennedy from Homefront (still waiting for it to come out on DVD or streaming - it's been 2 decades now) / Jaime Pressly from Raising Hope / Ellen Burstyn from Walking Across Egypt and a billion other movies / June Squibb recently an excellent guest on Code Black
Best Quotes -
1. Christy: "I'm sorry. I thought you were my grandmother." Stranger: "Well we're even. I thought you were nuts."
2. Bonnie: "Nope, not gonna do it. If I need an organ, I'll get it from you." Christy: "My liver might not be an upgrade."
3. Bonnie: "Shirley, a good friend of mine told me if I could forgive you, I could…I could finally be free of all the anger in my heart and I really need to be free of it 'cause if I'm not, I'm gonna drink again…or jog myself to death."
4. Bonnie: "That woman threw me away and I've spent every day since then thinking I was unlovable." Marjorie: "And sometimes you are. That being said, there might be an alternative to hating your mother for the rest of your life." Christy: "You got my attention."
5. Bonnie: "How'd this guy find me?" Christy: "Um well, your recent DUI seems to be the gift that keeps on giving."
6. Bonnie: "Well you know how they talk about that runner's high? Well it's real. It's not great but it's real."
Episode of the Week
This may be the most fun zombie brain yet. While Liv sounded like a bad walking comic book cliché, she was more fun than she has been in ages. Plus she kicked butt. Who doesn't like that? Sure it made little sense but now I'm really excited about seeing action Liv again. I'm also good with Rose McIver joining some superhero show when iZombie's done because her fight scenes worked for me. Surprisingly, the heart of the episode came through Major though. I like how he empathized with the woman's situation and even opened up to her. I would have liked him opening up to Liv or Ravi as well so the three of them could start tackling the Vaughn problem together. Still he at least opened up to someone and she was sympathetic to his choices, which may make it easier to tell the people he cares about later. As for this episode, it brought back the fun that has been sorely missing, added more action than normal, and contained a surprising amount of heart. That's a winning formula and I hope the rest of season 2 follows it.
Grade: B+
Best Reason to Watch - superhero Liv was cheesy fun
MVP - the dialogue
Best Scene - Major introduces Natalie to his freezer
Best Character Interaction - Major and Natalie
Best Aim - Liv, who accurately beams the gun runner in the head
Biggest Hmm - Does Liv just carry hot sauce around on her all the time now?
Biggest Stalker - Major, who goes through the zombie's personal effects before going after her
Biggest Shock - Liv makes her first non - Major zombie
Least Surprising - Clive breaks off the partnership with Liv
Most Redundant - Liv and Major break up…..again
Most Cheesy - Liv's hero dialogue
Most Pun-ny - Ravi and his makings of a hero (sandwich)
Most Nonchalant - the guy who just got turned into a zombie
Most On-Point - the music which was so weird it actually worked
Most Sweet Moves - Liv and she hasn't even trained
Worst Santa Ever - the crime lord, Mr. Boss
The "Well At Least It Isn't so Cheesy" Award - Liv's superhero costume looks straight out of Arrow. Maybe she can join them and we can truly get crossovers from hell.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Greg Finley, who ended up being one of my favorite aliens on Star-Crossed
Best Quotes -
1. Clive: "I was afraid this would happen." Liv: "You were afraid someone would find a grown a** man wearing a cape in the back of a garbage truck. Pretty specific fear."
2. Liv: "How do I know that you didn't call her from a landline?" Major: "Because this isn't 1987."
3. Natalie: "I literally got screwed into becoming a zombie hooker."
4. Liv: "This city needs more than a symbol." Ravi: "Yeah just keep saying stuff like that. I'll follow behind you, jotting notes for the graphic novel."
5. Major: "How badly could you want to die if you spent an hour untangling Christmas lights?"
6. Ravi: "The Fog certainly took some licks for the greater good." Liv: "Ravi, the most this guy ever did was momentarily distract criminals who were shocked to see a grown man in tights."
7. Blaine: "Wow, I am really rusty at the Welcome to Team Z speech. I should have made pamphlets."
8. Major: "Is that a bullet hole?" Liv: "Shop teacher brain was a little intense."
Guest Reviews
BY Emma
As midseason finales go, this one was pretty tame. While the case of the week was interesting, I expected the midseason finale to focus on the hit men hunting Garcia. Unfortunately, it seems that they will be saving that for when the shows returns (when was that again, CBS?). That being said, this episode did serve up some great character moments. Rossi and Garcia playing poker were hilarious and Rossi admitting after an info dump that he called Reid to get it. It was nice to have Reid mentioned but I really hope he is back after the winter hiatus – both the character and actor a sorely missed. Overall, it felt more like a regular episode than a midseason finale but the last minute or so does have me excited for the show's return. In the end, I guess that’s a mission accomplished.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch – medical experimentation always make for an interesting COTW
Best Scene – Rossi and Garcia playing poker
Most Missed – Reid
Best Continuity – Hotch asking JJ to rein in the media, calling back to her original role as Media Liaison
The “Welcome Back” Award - Vaughn Armstrong, Pamela Shaddock and Nancy Linehan Charles, each from many TV and film appearances spanning several decades
Best Quotes:
1. Garcia: “What? Really?” Rossie: “You have heard the expression “a poker face” before?”
2. Garcia: “Ok, here’s my finger, here’s the mute button. Are you guys done talking about the critter damage?”
BY Michaela Kollin
Bonnie’s lonely so she starts trolling for dudes at an AA meeting. It actually works out better than I would have expected for a dude-prowl at an AA meeting in a sitcom. I don’t know about you, but I don’t exactly think of eligible bachelors when I think of AA meetings. Bonnie comes to visit Steve, Christy’s lawyer boss who she met in AA. She is dressed subtly and classily in tiny short shorts and a bright red low-cut top. She then proceeds to show off for him by strutting around in a comedic way that’s meant to be sexy. Christy has to cope with Baxter and his girlfriend being better parents to Roscoe than she was. His grades have improved and he’s eating healthier. Christy learns that Baxter is planning on marrying Candace by slipping an engagement ring into her omelet. My advice to him: find another way to propose. Eggs are already kinda gross and putting a sharp metal object into them would just make eggs downright inedible. Christy tells Baxter she wishes she could be happy for him, but she thinks Candace is pushy and manipulative. Baxter touches her arm and replies, “I guess I have a type.” Ouch! Later at the diner, Christy has obviously not recovered from Baxter’s oh-so-innocent burn and angrily over-butters her bread. To divert attention, Christy mentions Bonnie’s flirtation with Steve and Marjory warns her not to play with his feelings. When Christy goes to visit him later, she finds out that he has real feelings for Bonnie and suggest he take things slow. He immediately shoots her down. This is definitely not Christy’s day, which is definitively proven when she walks in on Bonnie taking photos of herself in lingerie and is then forced into the role of Designated Camerawoman. She tells Bonnie to sit down with Steve and let him know she’s not really looking for a relationship and Bonnie finally agrees. Christy then walks out into the living room and finds Roscoe playing an extremely violent zombie-killing game which she allows him to keep playing so she can have a chance at competing in the Best Mom race with Candace. He distractedly thanks her and she mauls him with a mom-hug. Bonnie attempts to amicably break up with Steve but they end up hooking up instead.
Grade: A
Best Reason To Watch- Anna Faris’s comedic delivery
Best Scene- Christy takes photos of Bonnie in lingerie as they chat about Bonnie’s relationship with Steve.
Best Legs for Daisy Duke Shorts- Bonnie. For someone in her fifties, Allison Janney has some amazing legs.
Least Subtle Attempt at Peacocking- Bonnie. Her attempt at flirtation with the lawyer was not subtle in the least.
Most Awkward Walk-in- Christy walks in on Bonnie using a selfie stick to take sexy photos of herself in lingerie. If I caught my mom doing that, I’d probably spontaneously combust with embarrassment.
Best Quotes:
1. Bonnie: "I don’t like reformed heroin addicts. They’re so full of themselves. '
2. Christy: "You’re telling me not to forget? You who used to live in a van? You who was arrested in a Wal-mart for not wearing pants?"
3. Christy: "I am not upset, you big red turd." Bonnie: "Christy, is it really the bread you’re angry at?"
4. Jill: "I loved my father’s second wife way more than my mom. Of course, we wore the same size and she bought me vodka."
5. Bonnie: "I am not dating him as much as playing with him. Like when you hold a piece of yarn over a cat’s head and get them spinning around until they fall over."
6. Bonnie: "It’s Wednesday. Don’t you have some intercourse to do?"
BY Jessica VanWinkle
This was the best episode of Nashville this season hands down. Rayna and Deacon are finally engaged! I’ve wanted them to be together since the beginning so I am very happy. What else makes me happy? Markus Keen leaving and Caleb and Scarlett breaking up. Last week I named several characters I wished would leave town, and two of them left this week. Very exciting! Caleb was one of the most boring characters ever, and I’m so glad we don’t have to waste any more screen time on him. Besides Rayna and Deacon's engagement and awful characters leaving town, I liked that the episode featured the friendships between Avery, Will, and Gunnar. Gunnar and Will weren’t afraid to tell Avery that he had messed up with Emily which I thought was hilarious. I loved the scene near the end with the three of them and Scarlett hanging out together at the bar. The four of them have a great dynamic, and I can’t wait to see more of them together. Even though I enjoyed most of this episode, I felt bad for Luke. Not only does his son hate him, but he also owes $40 million in back taxes. Yikes! He didn’t have a good week at all, and my heart broke a little when Colt closed the door in his face and told him he lost everything. I also didn’t love that Wade hit on Luke. I thought it was kind of creepy, and it was really unexpected. I wonder if this will be explored more when the show comes back? I can’t wait for the show to return in March so we can see Rayna and Deacon get married. I hope everyone enjoyed this week as much as I did!
Grade: A
Best Scene: Deacon proposed to Rayna, and she said yes! Finally!
Best Reason to Watch: Romance and Friendship
Welcome Back Award: Music. It was so nice to have music in this show again.
Best Friendship: Avery, Will, Gunnar, and Scarlett
Sympathy Award: Luke Wheeler.
Biggest Shocker: Wade Cole is gay and tried to make a move on Luke.
Character We Won’t Miss: Markus Keen (This was a hard decision. We also won’t miss Caleb.)
Best Quotes:
1. Deacon: “Sometimes I just wish I could do everything all over again.” Rayna: “What would you change?” Deacon: “Everything. Nothing. Except this. Baby, I love you so much. Will you marry me?” Rayna: “Yeah.”
2. Gunnar: "Get her back, dude. Say you're sorry. Admit that you're a crazy person. Just get her back."
3. Will: “To Cadence.” Avery: “I'm not sure I'm comfortable with you getting drunk and honoring my daughter." Gunnar: “ Okay. How about ‘to us’?”
4. Wade: "You could have had it all, too, if you had just figured out how to play it right." Will: "Yeah. Maybe so. It turns out I'd rather be me than you."
BY Swanpride
I admit, I enjoyed the built-up to this episode a bit more than the actual pay-off, even though the episode was just as excellent. I mean, how can you go wrong with what is basically the set-up of Treasure Island (which happened to have been my favourite book growing up)? The only thing missing was Ward putting a rope around Fitz's midriff....which he really should have done. Honestly, his hubris was his biggest downfall in all this. I guess he never realized that he was no longer dealing with wide-eyed puppy Fitz. But the scenes on Earth weren't a slouch either. It was great to see Daisy's secret warriors on their first mission (poor Joey was really insecure) and it is always fun when all team members are allowed to display their strength. But even more interesting than this episode will be the repercussions from it. Let's not kid ourselves, Coulson stepped way over the line here, and by doing so gave "it" a chance to escape. He should have done the honourable thing and hauled Ward through the portal with him and Fitz. Jemma will now have to live with the guilt over Will dying for her as well as every Inhuman Lash takes out. On the upside, Mack might now have a better understanding for the kind of difficult decisions Coulson has to make in his position. There are also a lot of question mark left hanging...mainly how much of Ward is still left (yeah, I admit, I am not ready to let go of this character. I was never one of his defenders, but I enjoyed the heck out of his twisted mind).
Grade: A+
Best Reason to Watch - Hugs! Lots of hugs! I need one too!
Best Scene - This was a tumble from one great moment to the next.
Best Character - Hard to pick between badass Fitz, dark Coulson, crazy Ward, insecure Joey and poor Will.
Best Team-up - Daisy and her Inhumans.
Best Heart-Stopper - Joey jumping in front of the bullets. I hope that he will survive this season; he has been a great addition so far.
Best Turn - I always considered the possibility that the thing might have gotten to Will but until he started killing people without a second thought, he had me fooled.
Best Prop - Baby-plane on the mother ship is always fun to watch.
Best Action - Fitz killing "it". I especially loved Will's relieved expression.
Most Creepy - May finding the destroyed containment units. Just...eww!
Most Random Observation - I really like the little moments in this show, like Daisy hugging Jemma when she sees her safe and sound.
Biggest Head Scratcher - How did Ward manage to reach earth through a closing portal and a big explosion?
My prediction of the week - The wait for the next episode will be hell! Good thing that Peggy will be around.
Best Quotes -
1. Joey: "Okay, so are we rescuing Inhumans or saving Coulson? Or attacking HYDRA? Or is there some kind of combo? Sorry, new guy just trying to understand how this whole S.H.I.E.L.D. thing works." Hunter: "This is how S.H.I.E.L.D. works. Make a plan. Plan turns to rubbish. Make a new plan. Oh just to be crystal clear, this is the part where the plan turns to rubbish.
2. Coulson: “I’ll be damned. Tattoine.”
3. Lincoln: "You mean that you are not a hero, that you're freaking out and want to be anywhere but here? We are all feeling that." May: "I'm not!" Daisy: "Okay, everyone but May."
New Shows
Telenovela is one of those shows that could grow on me. The pilot is rough, really rough but the second episode was pure fun. In many ways I think you have to approach this comedy in a Jane the Virgin kind of way, minus the fantastic female family. If you go in knowing that every single second is going to be sillier than the next, it can be entertaining. The big standout is Eva Longoria, and that in itself is a shocker to me. Who knew she did physical comedy that well? Similar things that bugged me about Dr. Ken's pilot did not seem irritating with Longoria's spin. Sure the wardrobe malfunction was an eye roller and some of the dialogue is just ridiculous, but all in all the evil twin comedy was great. They play with the tropes that I can't stand and make them fun. Still this show has a long way to go and the rivalry between Ana and Xavier is a complete drag. If that's the focus in the next episode, I will be out. If they make it more of an ensemble piece, then I see this making marathon status. Either way, there's no room on my TV schedule for this show right now but I wish it the best when it comes back. Who's idea was it to air 2 episodes and then go on hiatus anyway? Slow clap for that decision.
Grade: C / B
Ranking - 3
Audience - people who prefer physical comedy and aren't put off by silly
Best Reason to Watch - Eva Longaria is not afraid to go all out comedy
Best Scene / Best Fight - Isabela and her twin sister
Best Acting - Isabela's totally fake sob story
Best Running Gag - the wind machine
Biggest Thanks - we don't hear all the details of Mimi's sex life because what we did was quite enough
Most Obtuse and Inconsiderate -Roxi for breaking up all the breakaway furniture so the crew needs to reset it
Most Disgusting - eating in the bathroom
Most Annoying - Ana and Xavier trying to one up each other
Most Brain Dead - whoever aired these two episodes by themselves and then sent the show on hiatus
Worst Friend - Ana, who asks Rodrigo if he would sleep with Mimi right in front of her
Strangest Reaction - Ana starts happy dancing when Xavier tells her that he cheated on her
The "Way to Ruin Their Innocence" Award - most people think of dolphins as playful while Ana and Mimi think of them as perverts
The "Welcome Back" Award - Eva Longoria from Desperate Housewives / Zachary Levi from Chuck / Amaury Nolasco from Gang Related
Best Quotes -
1. Mimi: "I'm happy with just the fantasy. Reality requires too much free time…and waxing."
2. Gael: "Mimi, tell Ana people love her." Mimi: "Oh sweetie, of course people love you. I mean the fact that anyone bought your Christmas album proves that."
3. Mimi: "Ana, you're asking me in front of my children to steal somebody's private property. What if we get arrested? What if we go to jail?" Ana: "I'll get you a babysitter." Mimi: "I'm already in the car."
4. Ana: "You were always so freaking quiet. It was like living with a Prius."
5. Gael: "All people are talking about is Ana and Xavi, Ana and Xavi…Ricky Martin's pantry makeover?" Ana: "What? Oh those are nice shelves."
Weekly Shows
Despite a transparent plot and a fairly over-the-top villain, this episode was a thrill ride of action and pacing. I loved that John basically MacGyver-ed the helicopter to explode, but even more so I liked that Natalie was able to handle herself under pressure. Yet Millar was the real revelation. I guess the guardian of a secret government project needs to know how to take people out too but it surprised me how professional he was at disabling the rotating automatic. He's got skills too. Shockingly, I also liked the political maneuverings once the helicopter went down. We don't often hear of the native struggle in Mexico so it was interesting to focus on it and I thought both Hugo and Gabriel were well done, with neither too overboard or stereotypical. It's a given that Angelica was an interesting character, one not to be trifled with.
Grade: B+
Best Reason to Watch - Millar and Natalie can hold their own in a crisis too
Best Fight - John vs. Volker
Best Reaction - Hugo to Angelica saying she was never a kid
Best Plan - John rigs the helicopter to explode once the soldiers open it
Best Shot - Millar, taking out the sniper rifle
Biggest "Oh, Man" - I really wanted Hugo to make it through this
Biggest Ouch - macuahuitl through the leg
Least Surprising - Volker is Ray
Most Surprising - the episode ends with John kidnapped
Most Interesting Tidbit - Agent X takes the same oath as the Vice-President of the United States
Most Deadly - the obsidian tips of the macuahuitl
The "Well That's One Way to Broker Peace" Award - getting shot down by terrorists who then chase you does make the little things less important
The "Welcome Back?" Award - Jerold's back and I'm not sure how I feel about that
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Hemky Madera, formerly Brujo on Ash vs. Evil Dead
Best Quotes -
1. John: "You know for a so-called mentor, you're a terrible influence."
2. Millar: "You blew it, Jerold. In love as in war, hesitation is death."
3. PotUS: "I watch this whenever I have a crisis of faith in this town." Natalie: "Right now you're entitled to a little bit of doubt." PotUS: "Doubt? I'm rapidly approaching paranoia."
4. Secretary: "It's just that I've spent my life protecting my daughter from all the ugliness in this world." Hugo: "I've been teaching my Angelica to eliminate it. There's been a price, perhaps too high." Secretary: "Maybe but not many 16 year old girls can fire a gun and sew up a chest wound."
5. Natalie: "Do you miss being a kid?" Angelica: "How can I miss something I never knew?"
It's a split episode again. Howard and Raj were juvenile and basically unfunny. Sheldon's earworm was fantastic and then lead to the heart of the episode. In fact, I liked this part so much that it raised the episode an entire letter grade. Given my predilection against shipping, it's odd how much I like Sheldon and Amy together. I think it is because after years of nothing, she brings out tremendous character growth in what was a stale character. Without the Amy growth, Sheldon would never have been comfortable enough to admit how much he needs Leonard and he wouldn't be near as human as he is now. The only problem with their relationship is that it is unbalanced. What does Amy get from Sheldon? That's what needs to be explored in this part of the story…or give her a plot line that does not revolve around Sheldon at all. She's a strong character. She needs more meat in the role.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch - Sheldon (which is unusual for me)
Best Reason to Fast Forward - Raj and Howard stalking their fan
Best Scene / Best Surprise - Sheldon tells Amy that he loves her and wants to get back together
Best Aww Moment - Sheldon acknowledges everything Leonard does for him / Sheldon acknowledges how much Amy has changed him
Best Twist - something as banal as an earworm has a much bigger purpose in the overall story and I never saw it coming
Best Tip - Lorre's vanity card about eating cookies in bed
Most Romantic? - love being described as dryer sheets, lint traps, and heartworm
Biggest Laugh - Sheldon gets out the tuba when Penny takes away his keyboard
Biggest Say What? - Are you telling me there isn't an app for this? Surely there's a name your earworm app.
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Dave
Best Quotes -
1. Sheldon: "This is Leonard. He's your best friend in the world." Leonard: "Just stop. This is ridiculous." Sheldon: "Sometimes he gets cranky, but you can trust him with your life and he does more things for you than I can even begin to list." Leonard: "Thank you."
2. Amy: "That's an interesting tie clip." Dave: "Oh thanks. It's Avogadro's Constant. It's useful for calculating the number of atoms in a substance or causing regret in anyone who asks about it."
3. Sheldon: "Amy, there was a song I couldn't get out of my head. Eventually I realized the song was about you and like that earworm, I can't get you out of my heart. So what I'm trying to say is you're my heartworm. The metaphorical kind, not the poodle killing kind." Amy: "What?" Dave: "If I may, I believe what he's saying in a charming and delightful way is that he loves you and wants you back. Dave Gibbs, huge fan of your work. Don't mind me."
4. Sheldon: "My goodness, do you sing along to the Greatest Hits of Elvis Presley with that mouth? Well they were no help at all." Leonard: "Which is crazy since rock and roll is all about good customer service."
5. Penny: "Well she did soften your life, didn't she?" Sheldon: "Yes, she's like the dryer sheets of my heart. I have to go." Leonard: "Awww, am I like the dryer sheets of your heart?" Penny: "Better. You're the lint trap of my love."
6. Sheldon: "First, music is dangerous. The movie Footloose tried to warn us but we wouldn't listen."
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch - each resident gets to be the hero and/or challenge themselves
Best Scene - Lily and Christa save Lily's brother
Best Reason to Get Over Yourself - Jesse stops worrying about a second heart attack to save his roommate
Best Teamwork - the 3 who clear the guy out from concrete
Best Time to Scream - Lily should start screaming until someone hears her at the bottom of the ravine
Biggest Douche - DIC Miles
Least Surprising - insistent man pulls a gun on Mario to make him continue working on his wife
Most Likely to Survive Anything - Lily, who helps Christa save her family
The "Welcome Back" Award - Bruce Nozick, an official "Hey It's That Guy" and also from The Last Ship / Gabriel Bateman from Stalker / Maggie Elizabeth Jones from Star-Crossed and We Bought a Zoo
Best Quotes -
1. Heather: "That guy's vest is missing a K."
2. Carla: "Who's the idiot who ordered the 2-D echo?" Jesse: "You can't be too careful you know." Carla: "Oh, so you're the idiot. You ordered your own tests?"
3. Heather: "What took you so long?" Mario: "I had to save a woman from a burning car. That' s right. Deal with it."
4. Jesse: "It wasn't a panic attack. It was an aftershock."
5. Gina: "I could kiss you right now, Jesse." Jesse: "My heart couldn't take it."
Elementary seems to be changing its focus away from the cases and towards the relationships. For the most part, it's working. I love that Sherlock and Watson are on the same page again. Sherlock's tense relationship with his father made the first couple of episodes. Now we get one devoted to the bromance between Alfredo and Sherlock. I really like this friendship because Sherlock doesn't have many people to keep him human outside of Watson. He has Gregson and Bell of course, but Alfredo allows for a different dynamic. I love the idea of Sherlock volunteering to do something because it might help his friend. It shows how much the character has grown since the beginning. Still, the case was pretty weak and felt like an afterthought even though that's where the bulk of the time went. I would have preferred that the case take second in airtime as well as importance.
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - it's really not about the case at all, but about Alfredo and Sherlock's bromance
Best Scene - the ending
Best Friendship - Alfredo and Sherlock, both of whom showed care for the other's well-being
Worst Archivist - Ostrin, who really should put those games in a safer place so they aren't accidentally destroyed
Biggest Laugh - Sherlock "punishing his brain" with videogames
Biggest Back Seat Player - Joan, who is definitely better at playing videogames than Sherlock
The "Who Knew?" Award - a terrible, non-released video games can sell for millions
The "Welcome Back" Award - Alfredo and Everyone
Best Quotes -
1. Sherlock: "I understand you're new at this, Mr. Ostrin, but revealing you're in possession of the very items we believe a man was killed over is not a great way of clearing yourself."
2. Watson: "Vintage rainbow suspenders. If there's money in stuff like this, I need to get to my parent's basement fast."
3. Watson (watching Sherlock play vintage video games): "What are you doing?" Sherlock: "Punishing my brain."
4. Sherlock: "It would seem my week has a theme of middle aged men clinging to pubescent glory via collectibles."
5. Sherlock: "You always suggested that I should sometimes be selfish with regards to my sobriety and yet here you are with yours at stake and you choose to be selfless. Shame on you."
6. Sherlock: "You do realize pink coconuts do not occur in nature."
It is possible that maybe 3 characters who aren't crazy or guilty of overacting did NOT cry in this episode, but I can't see clearly through all the tears. The waterworks were in full force tonight. Iris cries over the secret. Joe cries over Wally. Barry cries over the past. Patty literally cries over a lunatic. Wells cries for his daughter. His daughter cries for being stuck in this plot point (or perhaps the actress cries over her career). I weep for my 42 minutes that I can never get back and for the farce that is Caitlin and Jay. Since when did Caitlin become Iris, this season's love appendage? It's revolting and a giant step back. Give the poor woman a plot that does not revolve around becoming a stuttering idiot whenever her crush walks in the room. Ugh! Just ugh! Then adding in 3 characters I would be absolutely fine in NEVER seeing again made it even more of a lose-lose-lose episode for me. And then there was that dialogue. After the brain-numbing crossover, I thought that it was a good thing we had another episode before mid-season hiatus. I was wrong.
Grade: D+
Best Reason to Watch - misery loves company??? / at least it wasn't romance angst
Best Reason to Skip - all the freaking megmoangsting / the villain dialogue
Best Scene - that brief second at Christmas when everyone seems happy before Jay and Caitlin ruin it
Best Sibling Moment - Barry tells Iris that they will tell Joe about Wally together
Best Reaction - the group to Wally showing up
Best Speech - Barry talks Patty into not killing Mardon
Most Iffy - Wally, who could be a great addition, a complete melodrama suckfest, or gone in 2 episodes
Biggest Awww - Joe gives Barry his grandfather's watch since he's his son
Biggest Eye Roll - Caitlin and Jay
Biggest Waterworks - Joe blames himself for not knowing his son and Barry comforts him
Biggest Hmmm - I think I missed something. Why is this portal a one-way thing again? Shouldn't they send someone to Earth 2 if only to get some allies? Or to rescue Wells' daughter? Or to get out of this melodrama?
Worst Explanation of Christmas Ever - Caitlin
The "Where's the Glory in That?" Award - So these two clowns are going to prove they are Big Bad's by taking out a superhero that won't fight back? Okay, then.
The "Well That was Anticlimactic" Award - 33 minutes in and the bad guys are taken out nice and neat with nary a bomb in sight
The "What the Grinch Wouldn't Give" Award - he could have cleaned out Whoville in a nanosecond if he had a nifty breach and magnetism
The "Not Him Again" Award - Jay. Trickster. Weather Wizard. Snart. Choose your poison.
Best Quotes -
1. Joe: "It's official. Santa hates us."
2. Mardon: "We all want the same thing." Snart: "Fashion advice?" Mardon: "To see The Flash dead." Jesse: "Well that's more of a New Year's resolution but hey, I'm flexible."
3. Wells: "So why are you all not sleeping with the fishes?" Cisco: "Earth 2 has a Godfather." Wells: "Every Earth has a Godfather, Vito."
4. Iris: "Everyone in this room had a rough childhood. Get over it."
5. Snart: "I'm just not invested like they are." Iris: "You mean there's no money in it for you." Snart: "I was never much for non-profit work."
Into the Badlands has gotten more interesting every episode and is currently my favorite new show. By making betrayal the default setting, every action is questionable and every alliance shaky. I wasn't surprised to see that Zephyr was trying to take the barony but I am a little shocked that she's allying with the Widow to do it. No surprises on the Ryder front though. He was made to betray his father. The real power though goes to Lydia, who doesn't have to rely on monkshood to take down Jade. I adore how casually she mentions knowing about her son's affair with her husband's future wife. Now that's holding the cards. Veil is moving into a power position as well now that she's the secret medical advisor to Quinn. Nothing like hate to allow you to poison a baron and possibly get away with it. While I live for the action on this show, I'm starting to get pulled in by the political drama as well which may be the biggest surprise of all.
Grade: B+
Best Reason to Watch - the climax to war and betrayal has started
Best Scene - Lydia knows Jade is screwing Ryder as well as Quinn and mentions it to her.
Best Action - baron vs. baron fight
Best Back Story - Tilda was raped by the Widow's husband
Best Advice - don 't sleep with two people from the same crazy family at the same time
Best Decoy - Tilda
Least Surprising Alliance - the Widow and Ryder
Most Surprising Alliance - the Widow and Zephyr
Most Surprising - MK has gotten interesting if no less bratty
Biggest Hmm - It took them until they were right at the gate to notice no one was working in the fields or acting as lookout? Your powers of observation do not impress me.
Strangest Fashion Choice - Quinn has a nail shaped in a triangle
The "Curiosity Will Kill Ya" Award - Tilda, you should have skedaddled once you nicked MK
The "Welcome Back" Award - Edi Gathegi, who is currently making me want his character dead on The Blacklist
Best Quotes -
1. Waldo: "Sunny, listen to me. There is no 'through the wasteland.' There's just death and drought and more death, and you sure as sh** don't need a map to find it."
2. Jade: "I never had a mother and you never had a daughter. Maybe if we saw each other as that rather than as rivals it would help us survive this." Lydia: "Well if I were your mother, I would warn you not to sleep with your future husband and his son at the same time."
3. Jade: "I never wanted to be the person who brings you pain." Lydia: "Oh you don't. Quinn does that job very well."
4. Sunny: "Every force has its equal - fear, peace, dark, light - one can't exist without the other."
Cassandra is just plain annoying these days and her squeaky kid voice is even worse so Drunk Cassandra never needs to grace my TV screen again. Other than that though, I found this episode to be decent. I'm a huge fan of Jenkins going into the field and I loved the commentary on how narcissistic our society has gotten. (Count me as one who hates having her picture taken.) Dorian Gray was a letdown but the issues he brought up are worthy of debate. I also thought the reveals about Ezekiel were fantastic. Who knew he could diagnose overdoses? Not sure I completely buy his expendable rationale as to why they were chosen as librarians though. That would make the library itself the most cynical character on the show.
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - Ezekiel / conversation on digital narcissism
Best Scene - Eve jumps and declares the plan to be terrible, which it was
Best Teamwork - Jake and Ezekiel create a defibrillator out of utensils and wiring
Best Catch - Stone and the flying girl
Best Reaction - Baird to hearing they will have to go clubbing undercover
Best Shout Out - Jake mentions that T. S. Eliot was born in my hometown of St. Louis
Best Use of Constant Cell Phone Pictures - taking out the bad guys through their own hubris
Weirdest Ensemble - their club hopping outfits
Biggest Crime - besides almost killing a bunch of people, Gray has priceless art stored like a flea market pile and the archivist in me weeps
Biggest Shock - Ezekiel can diagnose a drug overdose
Biggest Hmm - Jenkins calls Baird "Eve" and tells her to ponder why she was chosen as Guardian
Most Heroic / Smartest - Baird
Most Likely to Monologue People to Death - Dorian Gray
Most Drawn Out Gag - Jake can't get into the club
Most High Tech - Dorian's cloud version of the novel
Most Depressing - all the facts Gray spouts to prove that people are getting more narcissistic and less connected every year
Most Annoying - Cassandra's squeaky drunk voice
Least Smart - Ezekiel, who posts magic pictures on social media like an idiot
Least Likely to Keep a Secret - Cassandra, who explains every magic tool in her purse to the phone check woman
Worst Loophole - the clipping book doesn't record old threats, which seem to be the most dangerous
Second Worst Plan - to shock someone without any insulation to keep you from being shocked too
Most Brilliant Plan - Ezekiel hacked the scanner company instead of the scanner
The "Yet Another Reason to Beware the Cloud" Award - evil, narcissistic people use it to control others and I'm not just talking reality TV celebs
Best Quotes -
1. Cassandra: "Why does the hangover last so much longer than the party?" Jenkins: "It's nature's way of making sure you understand there's always a price."
2. Jenkins: "Mr. Jones, please tell me you did not post this anywhere that has a tweet, a face, or a gram."
3. Baird: "Fun. People bumping into you, spilling drinks on you, music so loud your ears bleed. Wow, when did I turn into Grandma."
4. Baird: "Worst. Plan. Ever."
5. Baird: "Swipe left."
Ugh, just ugh. This whole episode felt like filler and emoangsty, self-righteous, whiny filler at that. I'm not sure there was one character who did NOT annoy me in this episode with Nimah leading the way. She's as self-righteous as she accuses Simon of being. If just one of these recruits would mind their own freaking business, I might not spend the entire episode throwing socks and itching to Gibbs' slap everyone. Here's one GIANT "Shut Up!!!" to all of them. Could we please finally get some forward movement on the freaking terrorist instead of soap opera relationships? I am out of patience.
Grade: D
Best Reason to Watch - Um….well…..yeah, I've got nothing. Perhaps Simon being kidnapped.
Best Scene / Best Speech - Booth saying that they all deserve to be there
Best Back Story - pretty much everyone who spilled their secrets tonight
Best Reference - 21 Jump Street
Biggest Ouch - Shelby finds out her "sister" is conning her
Biggest Eye Roll - Alex and Booth's "I love you" dancing
Biggest Awww Moment - Caleb holds Shelby as she cries
Most Annoying - The persistent case of the "buttinskis" that every one of these characters have. They are all getting to be like Elias, never knowing when to butt out.
Most Thorough - they even have security tailing Booth, who's lying in a hospital bed
The "Get Over It" Award / Biggest Witch - Nimah seems to be taking Simon's decision to turn in Langdon personally for no apparent reason. It's getting old fast and I don't even like Simon.
Best Quotes -
1. Simon: "I wish we could go back to being the optimistic people who signed up to save the world, but we can't because we never were those people to begin with and we can never go back to Quantico."
2. Miranda: "Bad guys don't play fair. So do it again and next time it's two against one 'cause bad guys don't take turns." Brandon: "Not the threesome I was hoping for."
3. Alex: "Miranda, you once told us never to turn our backs on the people who needed you the most." Miranda: "It's the people of New York who need you the most now." Alex: "Do it."
4. Natalie: "So Jump Street…"
5. Alex: "This feels so wrong." Miranda: "Doing the right thing often does."
As a regular every day Scorpion episode, this episode was pretty good. However it followed up on a major death and so much of the episode felt off to me. The pacing worked internally but not within the season. What I mean is that I really think Megan's death should have been the midseason finale. Making a time jump here feels off because the audience hasn't had a time jump. It feels like Megan's death is not getting the gravitas it deserves although it is clear they are not forgetting that she died. I'm not sure exactly what I expected but the episode left me a little empty. Still, the case itself was interesting if not bizarre. Wouldn't it make more sense to have Sylvester be the drama teacher and Walter the wrestling guy? I mean it isn't as if all wrestlers come in the same size. There are different weight classes. I did like that everyone was faced with some home truths and the countdown to disaster worked as always. I just wish that either we had seen the team process Megan's death or that we were given the same time as the characters.
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - everyone's getting schooled tonight
Best Scene - Cabe clears the entire quad by claiming he's DEA
Biggest Awww Scene - Paige uses Megan to calm Sylvester / Happy dances with Toby to cheer him up
Best Hug - Ray and Walter
Best Club - I agree with Sylvester. Scorpion is far cooler than Frat Row.
Best Plan - Time jump to 6 weeks after Megan's death. I'm surprised that wasn't the midseason finale to be honest. The 6 weeks jump would have been perfect there and the show would have gone into hiatus after a big event.
Worst Plan - to not give viewers 6 weeks to process too
Biggest Truth - the sorority pledge gets Happy right in the circumstances
Biggest Ouch - tie - Walter crushes the dreams of the drama department with statistics / Toby's nemesis lays down some home truths of his own
Biggest Facepalm - a party almost kills them
Most Shocking / Biggest Huh? - Walter does the drama thing well. Too well. Say what?
Most Ridiculous Music and Slow-Mo - the astronaut walk
Nicest Friend Move - Walter cares enough about Ray to prove that he didn't get his partner killed
Dumbest Criminal - What kind of an idiot screeches into a place to kill someone in broad daylight to tie up loose ends? Way to make yourself a loose end, moron!
Dumbest Pseudo-Criminals - If the killer is down and the gun falls away from them, pick up the freaking gun or get shot with it later.
The "Yeah, NO" Award - no way I would let Deputy Fife cuff the guy who held a country hostage
The "Way to Use Your Positive Thinking" Award - Team Scorpion lists every possible way this could end with their deaths
The "Adios" Award - Bye Ray. I didn't like you. I didn't dislike you. You were just mouthy furniture to me.
The "I'm No Genius But…" Award - …shouldn't Walter take off his watch before dunking it in glycerin?
The "Welcome Back" Award - Thomas Kasp from Surviving Jack, which I miss
Best Quotes -
1. Sylvester: "Walter can't get in. Can I start hoarding cans of food now please?"
2. Cabe: "Have you ever wrestled?" Sylvester: "With my emotions."
3. Sylvester: "Oh no, I am not going back to college. College was the worst 6 months of my life." Toby: "I'm in and I'm gonna do it right this time. College sucked hard for 14 year old Tobias Curtis." Paige: "Guys, college is fun." Walter: "College is a continued adolescence factory where parents subsidize years of nonsense instead of serious academic rigor." Paige: "Yeah, fun."
4. Cabe: "Wrestlers wear singlets." Sylvester: "On what? Their wrists?"
5. Happy: "The only thing I hate more than hearts is anything frilly or pink, but for Megan I made an exception."
