A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team this past week. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off below the article.
1) Patterson: "Born Gord Enver. Pretty decent programmer. Knocked around, made a reasonable living as a tech mercenary. But here's the thing. He was one of the first guys in the world to realize that the Bitcoin was gonna be a big deal. Put everything he had into it, and within a couple years, he was worth half a billion dollars." Zapata: "Smart guy." *Patterson: "*After that, he changed his name to Rich Dotcom." Zapata: "I take it back." (Babar)
2) Mayfair: "Got something?" Zapata: "We've been searching properties that Enver owns within a helicopter's flying radius." Reed: "Don't you mean Dotcom?" Zapata: "I'm not calling him Dotcom." (Babar)
1) The Doctor: "You'll find it is a very small universe when I'm angry with you."(Justyna)
2) The Doctor: "Fix this. Fix it now." Me: "It... It's not possible. I can't." The Doctor: "Yes it is, you can, and you will, or this street will be over. I'll show you and all your funny little friends to the whole laughing world. I'll bring UNIT, I'll bring the Zygons. Give me a minute, I'll bring the Daleks and the Cybermen. You will save Clara, and you will do it now, or I will rain hell on you for the rest of time." Clara: "Doctor, stop talking like that." Me: "You can't." The Doctor: "I can do whatever the hell I like. You've read the stories, you know who I am. And in all of that time, did you ever hear anything about anyone who stopped me?" Me: "I know the Doctor. The Doctor would never..." The Doctor: "The Doctor is no longer here! You are stuck with me. And I will end you, and everything you love." (Justyna)
3) Clara: "You. Now you listen to me. You're going to be alone now, and you're very bad at that. You're going to be furious and you're going to be sad, but listen to me. Don't let this change you. No, listen. Whatever happens next... wherever she is sending you, I know what you're capable of. You don't need to be a warrior. Promise me. Be a Doctor." The Doctor: "What's the point of being a Doctor if I can't cure you?"
Clara: "Heal yourself. You have to. You can't let this turn you into a monster. So... I'm not asking you for a promise. I'm giving you an order. You will not insult my memory. There will be no revenge. I will die, and no-one else, here or anywhere, will suffer." The Doctor: "What about me?" Clara: "If there was something I could do about that, I would. I guess we're both just going to have to be brave."(Justyna)
1) Karl: "But now, now I must bid you all adieu, admonish you to watch your proverbial butts, for I shall be back with the sledgehammer of justice, prepared to lay Joseph waste on these four walls! If you so much as touch a hair on my client's--"
2) Karl: "I am sound in mind and body and ready to run circles around the inferior minds of the Rock County Sheriff's department." Sonny: "Lou's a state cop, Karl." (Darth Locke)
Karl: "Shut up, Sonny. I will need you to drive, however."
3) Peggy: "Life's a journey, and the one thing you don't do on a journey is stay in one place, right?"(Darth Locke)
4) Lou: "This kind of thing didn't work in Westerns and it's not gonna work tonight."(Darth Locke)
1) Taylor: "You read my mind?" Matt: "Yeah, that's sort of my thing."(Laura)
2) Noah: "Nice car." Luke: "Listen, I just wanna help." Noah: "We heard you the first time. We're not interested." Luke: "Oh, yeah, where were you when she was crossing the country by herself?" Noah: "She's safe now, that's all that matters." Luke: "Listen, Malina is meant to do something important. We both know this." Noah: "And you, what, you just wanna come along for the ride? Why don't you tell me how you knew where the boy was?" Luke: "My wife and I were hunting EVOs because we thought they killed our son on June 13th. It was, uh, I don't know, some misguided retribution. We were gonna kill him." Noah: "EVOs did not kill your son." Luke: "Look, I don't know you, but something tells me that you understand loss and what that does to a parent." Noah: "You don't know anything about me."(Laura)
Luke: "Okay, fine, maybe I don't. What am I supposed to say? I am sorry! What I did wasn't right. The things that I've done, they will haunt me for the rest of my life. They brought me to try and kill myself, until your granddaughter saved me. There's gotta be a reason behind that. Look, you have every reason not to trust me. But I am different now."(Laura)
3) Matt: "How did you know that wasn't me?" Harris: "Oh, I didn't." Matt: "WHAT? Well, ask a question! Find out first! You could've killed me."
Harris: "50/50's pretty good odds." Matt: "Yeah, if you're shooting somebody that doesn't matter!" Harris [thinking]: "You've got that right."
4) Luke: "Malina - she changed everything. She showed me my destiny. I genuinely wanna help." (Laura)
1) Sinclair: "I may be a lot of things, but racist is not one of them." Nate: "That's what racists always say."(Laura)
2) Annalise: "Shoot me." Connor: "No." Annalise: "I'm the woman who ruined your life, and I'll ruin Oliver's too." Connor: "You've lost your mind." Annalise: "Computer hacking, falsifying records, and that face. The friends he'd make behind bars." Connor: "YOU DON'T GO NEAR HIM."
Annalise: "Then take this gun and shoot me!" Connor: "Okay." Annalise: "I know you're strong enough to do this." Connor: "OKAY, OKAY, I'LL DO IT." Annalise: "Shoot me in the leg. You can do this." Michaela: "Connor, Connor please don't do this. CONNOR! NO!" Annalise: "SHOOT ME!" Michaela: "NO! No, please no. Don't. No." Connor: "I hate you so much."(Laura)
3) Annalise: "They killed Sam, Asher." Asher: "What?" Annalise: "It wasn't Bonnie. She just said that to protect them. But Sam attacked Rebecca and they killed Sam. And I've been covering for them the whole time. And now they're gonna help cover for you."
Michaela: "Why are you doing this to us?"(Laura)
4) Michaela: "Connor! Connor, please don't leave without me!" (Laura)
1) Jessica: "You turn that thing on, I’ll pull your underwear through your eye." (Nirat)
2) Jessica: “I don’t give a bag of dicks what kind of kinky shit your into as long as you do it quietly.” (Nirat)
3) Jessica: "The only thing you can charge me with, is trying to make a god damn living in this god damn city” (Nirat)
4) Will: “Some people need to be removed from this earth and Kilgrave is one of them.” Trish: “We don’t get to decide that, killers decide that, that’s what makes them killers.” Will: “That’s naive.” Trish: “And idealistic and futile but I wasn’t justice for my friend, for that girl in prison, for you and me. I want Kilgrave to live long and alone and despised until he wants to die but can’t. Because that’s justice and I’ll fight like hell for that.”(Nirat)
5) Jessica: "You think you’re the only ones who lost people? You think you’re the only ones with pain? You think you can take your shit and dump it on me? You don’t get to do that! So you take you god damn pain and you live with it, assholes!"(Nirat)
6) Jessica: "My greatest weakness, occasionally I give a damn." Robin: ”She’s a sexual predator, he’s just a boy.” Malcolm: “He’s in his 20’s.”
7) Jessica: “Well it’s five o’clock somewhere and I need to update my resume. Would you put day drinking under ‘Experience’ or ‘Special Skills’
8) Jessica: “I don’t get you. You have money, looks, creepy, if not your adoring fans and you’re a freaking household name. What more do you want?” Trish: “To save the world, of course.”(Nirat)
9) Jessica: “No one else will die because of me, I’m taking myself out of the equation.”(Nirat)
10) Jessica: “Kilgrave talk about obvious, was MurderCorpse taken?”(Nirat)
11) Jessica: “Sorry about the mess.” Luke: “At least it’s not on fire.” Jessica: “Guess where both lousy renters.”(Nirat)
1) Rebecca: "Congratulations on your promotion to Director, Mike." Mike: "Thanks guys. Just one more thing - we're the Muntouchables now." Brian: "MIKE, NOOOOOOOOOO!"(Laura)
2) Dennis: "You've always told me the truth. No matter what kind of trouble you were in, you never lied to me. I loved you for that." Brian: "I love you, dad, but this time it is dangerous if I tell you the truth." Dennis: "I don't care. I would suffer for you. I would die for you. You're my son. You're my Brian." Brian: "There is a drug, you're right about that." Dennis: "Okay." Brian: "There is a drug. And it's called NZT."(Laura)
3) Ike: "They've been whispering a lot lately. I can only make out a few words of the language, but I think they're talking about resorting to cannibalism. I'm the new guy, I mean, who do you think they're gonna choose?" Brian: "Ike, do you see the crates behind you, the ones labelled "MAD"? That means food in Danish. You are delicious looking, don't get me wrong, but I think you've got a few more days."(Laura)
4) Brian: "You know, Naz, I was really hoping you wouldn't make me play this card, but remember that time a few weeks ago when you were languishing in prison? And how I got you out, and stuff?" Naz: "If you would like an office as a reward for your good work, we can discuss -"
Brian: "No, Naz. Boring stuff happens in an office, cool stuff happens in a headquarters!" (Laura)
1) Mitzy: "Hey! You can’t cut me off from the world like that!" Julio: "The world wants a break" (Prpleight)
2) Andy: "There’s an “er” between the “dick” an the “hoof” (Prpleight)
1) Barry: "Zoom destroyed me. He showed everyone in Central City what he could do and that I'm powerless to stop him. They gave me the key to the city, Joe. I'm supposed to be their hero. I'm supposed to be the guy who can protect them from something as evil as that, and I failed. In front of all of them! When they see The Flash, all they see now is someone not strong enough to protect them." (Robert)
2) Henry: "Sometimes you've just got to slow down to get back to where you want to be." (Robert)
Honorable Mentions
Hawaii Five-0
1) Lou: "Ah, college dorm life. where hygiene and ramen noodles go to die."
Homeland
1) Saul: You know what, Dar? You will remember this moment. Maybe not tomorrow or the next day, but six months from now or a year and it will shame you.
Jessica Jones
1) Jessica: “You want a drink? I want a drink.” Claire: “It’s five in the morning.” Jessica: “Exactly.”
2) Claire: “Take off your pants.” Jessica: “I usually like a little romancing.” Claire: “Don’t we all?”
3) Trish: “Your basic pedophiles van.”
4) Jessica: “Jesus, I didn’t ask for your wedding vows.”
5) Pam: “I want to, I really want to, but first, the divorce… I’m catholic.”
6) Jessica: “The dogs alright?” Luke: “Of course they’re okay, I don’t hurt dogs.”
7) Hope: "It’s not my fault."
8) Luke: "It’s okay I won’t break”
9) Kilgrave: "Once I told a man to go screw himself, can you even imagine?"
As always, thank you for reading. Let me know in the comments what some of your favorite quotes this past week have been!
