Quote of the Week, 4th January 2015

A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team this past week. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off below the article.


BENCHED, "Brief Encounters & Campaign Contribution", 30th December, 2014

Dahne: Nina "Perfect. She just got a new perm. Tell her you like her hair."
Bailiff "All rise."
Nina "Abort, abort, abort, abort."
Phil "Perm…ission to approach the bench, Your Honor."

Walter "Everyone here looks like the people I run over in Grand Theft Auto."

Phil "That is the longest I've ever talked about my job while not at work." Nina: "That was not even 2 minutes." Phil: "I know. I'm exhausted."

Client "I can beat this thing."
Nina "Okay, you showed your penis on a bus. There were 18 witnesses. Seven of them were Jehovah's."

Donna "Lady, you need serious help. I'm talking like some Girl, Interrupted kind of sh**. I'm not qualified for that."

Nina "I hate to bother you."
Donna "Not that much, apparently."

Cheryl "We made you a signature cocktail. It's called a Whitley Sour, not that you're sour. You're just irritable. Congratulations."


MIRANDA, "The Final Curtain", 1st January, 2015

Nirat Anop: Miranda "I've realized that women like me can be sexy. It's just that the world might never affirm it so it takes us a little longer to realize it".

Gary "Will you elope with me? Just us. Because I've realised I don't want to be without you. I love you"
Miranda "Oh Gary."

Miranda "I promise never to laugh at your fear of geese."
Gary "Oh, oh, oh and I promise to always enjoy hotel rooms to the max and to remind our children to never stop galloping."

Miranda "I love you too, I've just got to say goodbye to someone. Dearest chums, I don't know when or if we'll see each other again but just thank you for being the most amazing friends, love oo"


THE LIBRARIANS, "And the Apple of Discord", 28th December, 2014

Dahne: Jenkins: "May I get you anything to drink?" Drake: "The tears of our enemies running from their bodies as their bones are crushed." Jenkins: "I have jasmine tea." Drake: "Oh jasmine. Yes, please."

Flynn "Eastern and western dragons have been in a blood feud for 3,000 years."
Jenkins "Not dissimilar to the east coast-west coast hip hop rivalry of the late 20th century."

Flynn "Little criticism. Since I've been back, the Librarians seem kind of evil."

Jenkins "So did you come to take them away? I keep their bags packed."

Ezekiel "That's the Dulaque bloke. Is he eating my extra cheese and double pepperoni? He is evil." also picked by Robert Fruin

Robert Fruin: Ezekiel "You act like you're better than everyone else, complain about how were in your way, invading your annex. I could never figure out the real you, until now. The real you is a coward"

Jenkins "I did choose, once. I chose a side in a very complicated...I chose. No good came of it, and over the years I chose again and again. Each time a little hope, lots of blood and nothing really changed. I finally learned my lesson. I came here just to do my work, alone, because why choose. Oh god. Nothing ever changes.


THE MUSKETEERS, "Keep Your Friends Close", 2nd January, 2015

sandi: Rochefort (after Athos punches him to the ground) "What was that for?"
Athos "To see how it would feel. It felt good."

Aramis "Ah, let him take the credit. We don't need praise or glory."
Porthos "Praise and glory are two of my favourite things." also picked by Dahne

Porthos "Where are you going?"
Aramis "To answer a summons from the Cardinal."
Porthos "I should have nailed down the coffin lid myself." also picked by Dahne

De Foix "I knew him as soon as I saw him."
Treville "Who?"
De Foix "The Musketeer called Porthos. He's Belgard's son, isn't he? I'm facing my end. I'd like to die knowing I'm not responsible for the boy's death."
Treville "I couldn't live with what we'd done. So I searched for them for years, without success. And then call it fate, chance, God, what you will he came to me."
De Foix "And the woman? His mother?"
Treville "She died of despair soon after we abandoned them in the slums."
De Foix "We broke her heart. Does Porthos know?"
Treville "No."
De Foix "You must tell him who his father is."
Treville "We made a vow. We swore to Belgard we would never betray him. Porthos can never know who his family is."
De Foix "We were wrong, and if you won't tell him, I will."
Treville "Why rake up the past now? Porthos is content, why not just let it be?"
De Foix "It was the most shameful act of my life and this is my chance to make amends. Don't ask me to take my guilty soul to the grave."

Dahne: Athos "They say he wore out his heart in the service of France."
D'Artagnan "It's a pleasant surprise to hear he had one at all."

Constance "I'm a woman, d'Artagnan. A woman in a world built for men."

Aramis "He said he will only answer to God now not some French...well, then he questioned our parentage."

About the Author - Sandi

Sandi is part of the Senior Staff at SpoilerTV having been a contributor from back in the Lost days of DarkUFO, and who now writes previews for Banshee, The Musketeers, Atlantis, and other BBC shows. She also enjoys watching and commenting on other shows such as Sons of Anarchy, Hannibal, Game of Thrones and Elementary.

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