The Walking Dead, “Self Help,” was written by the team of Heather Bellson and Seth Hoffman and was directed by Ernest Dickerson. The title refers to one of the funniest scenes yet this season, but also pertains to each of the characters on a deeper level. This episode is the one most readers of the comic have been waiting for: Eugene’s (Josh McDermitt) reveal of the truth. He’s not a scientist, and he can’t save the world. The episode is beautifully written to dovetail nicely with the previous episode as well as folding in Abraham’s (Michael Cudlitz) backstory.
The episode follows Abraham, Eugene, Rosita (Christian Serratos), Tara (Alanna Masterson), Glenn (Steven Yeun), and Maggie (Lauren Cohan) as they attempt to make their way to Washington, DC. As the episode begins, they are all light-hearted, Rosita is teasing Abraham about needing a haircut and it’s clear that there is something between them. Tara picks up the banter, but she sees that there is something bothering Eugene. When she pushes him, he just says he’s bothered by what happened at the church, what the Preacher did. And no doubt he’s bothered by Gabriel’s (Seth Gilliam) belief that he is going to hell for what he’s done. Every cast member is terrific in this episode, but Cudlitz, McDermitt, Masterson, and Serratos are stand outs.
Maggie and Glenn push Eugene for more details, and once again, he quickly comes up with a non-answer. I loved Glenn simply switching to “why the hair?” He defends it by saying that T Brooks Ellis, the director of the human genome project and the smartest man he knew liked his hair – the implication is that they should too. Ellis, Eugene says, said that it made Eugene look like a fun guy – which he is. He then reiterates that he’s not Sampson. And of course, we certainly know now that he isn’t – he can’t possibly save the world. FYI, the actual head of the National Human Genome Research Institute was Francis Collins who stepped down in 2008 to be replaced by Alan Edward Guttmacher who was then replaced in 2009 by Eric D Green. It’s not clear whether Eugene is wrong about Ellis or is just making him up entirely. Regardless, it’s possible that Eugene is not as smart as even he thinks he is.
After the bus crashes, it’s interesting that both Abraham and Tara call for Eugene first to make sure he’s ok. Everyone else exits the bus to take care of the walkers, with Abraham leaving Tara in charge of covering Eugene. Tara tells him, “I know it sucks and it’s scary, but it’s time to be brave.” Eugene tells her it’s not voluntary – he later admits to being a coward. Tara responds, “It is (voluntary) when you’re screwed either way.” She gives him a knife to maybe help somebody. Tara knows what he’s going through because remember when we first met her she was all talk and no action, she froze.
And finally, Eugene realizes that whether he risks his life and acts or simply stands there, the odds are the same that he will die. With nothing to lose, he actually helps Tara and stabs a walker in the throat – which of course just slows it down so Tara can actually kill it herself, but there’s no denying that Eugene has crossed a line. He’s not only just helped himself – which is what the Preacher did that bothered Eugene so much. In only saving himself, Gabriel left everyone else to die. Now, Eugene has actually risked himself to help save Tara.
The title’s most obvious reference is to the funniest scene of Eugene watching while Rosita and Abraham have sex. It’s their way of affirming they are alive, of shutting out the horror around them. It also provides an interesting contrast to Maggie and Glenn who are simply snuggling. There was a time when Maggie simply wanted sex with Glenn for that life affirming release, but now, they have more.
Eugene tells Tara when she catches him watching from the “Self Help” section that it’s a victim-less crime. They don’t mind and he gets some satisfaction. She’s not there because of that – though it’s also hilarious when she takes a quick peek herself before leaving! She’s actually there to thank Eugene for having her back after the bus crash. Eugene tells her that she provided the “context” that lead to him saving her. She explained it in terms that he was able to understand. He tells her, “I thought it was trite, but it was true. Point to you.” Tara tells him, “You have this. Even if you didn’t before, you do. I’m the same way.” It’s hard to move beyond paralysis to help yourself, let alone help someone else, but it’s in helping others that we save ourselves – and that’s the real point of this episode.
In that moment, Eugene confesses to having sabotaged the bus. Tara tells him not to say anything to anyone else. Eugene tells her that he panicked because he knows that if he doesn’t save the world he has no value – which is exactly what was going on in the hospital last week! Eugene is terrified that if he can’t save the world, they won’t share resources let alone protect him. But Tara distinguishes our core group from those at the hospital. She denies that would ever happen because they are friends. They have each other’s backs – it’s not a quid pro quo. Those who can save others do it and in so doing save themselves because they are part of the human race – which Tara welcomes Eugene to with a fist bump.
When taking the fire truck goes sideways, Eugene is actually the one to save them all with his quick thinking and using the fire hose to blast the walkers apart. And bless Greg Nicotero for always finding new ways to kill walkers! It’s yet more proof for Eugene that he has value beyond the promise to save the world. He can actually contribute to the group. It’s the group’s very acceptance that finally makes him blurt out that he’s not a scientist. When Abraham loses it and pushes Rosita down, Eugene finally reaches the point where he can’t let anyone else die for his lies.
He also realizes that Abraham is now at the breaking point and is likely to put him – and the rest of the team in harm’s way. Rosita refuses to believe it because she’s seen him do things, but Eugene says he just knows things. Eugene has managed to justify the sacrifices of others by believing he was doing them a favor by forcing them to go to Washington because he thought that would be the safest place, so in essence he was saving them by having them save him. Eugene appeals directly to Abraham by saying, “I’m still smarter than you” – demonstrating that he still has value. But that’s not the value he holds for Abraham, and Abraham comes up swinging, punching Eugene until he’s up against the now dead fire truck. Abraham’s final punch bounces the back of Eugene’s head off the truck and results in a magnificent face plant into the concrete for Eugene. Is he dead? Brain dead? The rest of the team still rush to him with concern through, proving Tara’s assertion.
Abraham is really at the center of this episode. It begins and ends with flashbacks to his story. We begin with Abraham soon after the outbreak. He’s holed up in a supermarket with his family – Ellen (Andrea Moore), his wife, AJ, and Becca. We see blood on his hands and face as he brutally murderers what we can only suppose was an intruder – intent on getting food and potentially hurting his family – or maybe they were just looking for sanctuary too. There’s no way to tell. We do see that his wife and kids are shocked by his brutality and are clearly afraid of him, eventually running out and leaving a note not to come looking for them.
Of course, by the end of the episode, Abraham has found them and they are dead. He rips off his dog tags and is about to shoot himself in the head when he hears Eugene screaming for help and pathetically stumbling along barely in front of some walkers. And we see what is likely Eugene’s first lie. It seems likely as well that after saving Eugene, Abraham is about to finish killing himself, but Eugene tells him he can’t leave. When Abraham asks why, Eugene tells him, “I have a very important mission.” We only see Abraham’s reaction from the back, but he head comes up and he squares his shoulders. He’s still a soldier and that mission is what gives him purpose again. The possibility that it hasn’t all been in vain. That he hasn’t killed and gotten people killed for nothing.
It’s clear that Abraham has also been affected by what happened at the church, symbolized by the wound on his hand. Throughout the episode, Abraham can be heard humming what sounds like a hymn. When faced with the town full of walkers, Abraham mutters “I will not abase. I will not give up the ship.” The first could be a messed up version or allusion to Psalm 101 which concerns singing of mercy and judgment. And the third part of the Psalm states “I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me.” The second part of what he mutters is a fairly famous battle saying. Either way, religiously or militarily, Abraham is not going to be deterred from his mission. Yet, the mission is also costing him. Abraham’s bloody hands in the flashback are mirrored in the present by the wound on his hand from the fight at the Church.
It’s interesting that Abraham protect Eugene in every way. When Eugene expresses concern about Abraham’s hand after the bus crash, he dismisses it as nothing and even though Eugene says he is fine, Abraham insists that Rosita check him over for wounds. But when Glenn asks about the wound on his hand, Abraham is honest and says it’s pretty bad. It's Rosita who he lets help him. Each time they have to stop or fight, the wound re-opens. It’s bleeding when Abraham gets out of the fire truck to investigate the smell, but it’s pouring blood after he beats on Eugene.
After the bus crash, Abraham is frantic to keep going, stating “We’re at war and retreat means we lose. Glenn is concerned and wants to know Abraham is ok. Up until this point, Abraham has been a reliable leader. Glenn demonstrates his own value in this episode. He stays calm and offers the support that Abraham needs. Glenn checks on Abraham and relieves him for watch. Abraham thanks him for showing up and honoring his deal to come. Abraham tells him, “it’s gotten so everyone alive is strong now. You have to be. They’re either strong so they can help you so you help them or they can kill you so you gotta kill them.” We’ve seen this play out through the Governor, Terminus, Joe’s crew, the farm, and the prison. Abraham goes on to say, “It’s never easy. But that’s not the truth. It’s the easiest thing in the world now.” He’s referring to killing. I suspect that killing has always been relatively easy for Abraham and that’s what scares him. Glenn says, “World’s gonna change, right?” And Abraham confirms, “You’re damn right.” It has to because he clearly wants to stop killing.
Abraham is adamant that they not stop or detour even when it is impossible for them to go forward. He tells them, “it’s either walkers or you end up cornered. You end up staying and you end up killing. We can’t go back.” This is essentially what happened with his family. First they were cornered in the store and he had to kill and then his family left and were eaten by walkers. When he ended up cornered in Terminus and then again at the church, he was also forced to kill. He wants that brighter future.
It’s that purpose and that future that is driving Maggie and Glenn, but Maggie especially. In the bus, Maggie frets about the others – maybe they’re just behind us. And in the bookstore, she feels guilty that they “get to have this.” “This” is hope for the future. She says to Glenn, “It’s not about what was. Not last night. It’s all about what’s gonna be.” And of course, this also begs the question about Maggie’s letting so go of the past that she seems not to care at all about what happened to her sister. I can’t wait to see the reunion between Beth (Emily Kinney) and Maggie.
The scene between Maggie and Eugene parallels Eugene’s relationship to Abraham. Maggie’s entire future depends on Eugene. It’s a nice touch that Eugene is reading HG Wells The Shape of Things to Come. Is this, in fact, Eugene’s last desperate attempt to come up with a solution? In the novel, a world state is imposed to solve all of the world’s problems. One of the things Wells envisioned in his “future-history” was the abolition of religion. If Eugene is afraid of going to hell, this might be appealing to him…
Maggie, however, says she knows why he has the haircut – he’s not the person people think he is. She attributes him with the strength of his convictions and the strength to stand out in a crowd, and of course, she couldn’t be more wrong. However, she reminds him of all the people who have given their lives to get him to where he is. She tells him the story of Samson the lion and Samson coming upon the corpse of the lion filled with bees. Samson said, “out of the eater, something to eat. Out of the strong, something sweet.” Again we have a biblical tale. Samson was given his strength from God, but even out of killing, something good can happen. It dovetails back to what Abraham said to Glenn about the strong – do they do something “sweet” like help others or do the kill – or give up?
It’s clear that both Maggie and Abraham were living for the mission, for that future utopia. What happens now that that has been taken away? I suspect that Glenn will have to take over and lead them back to Rick (Andrew Lincoln). We see a lot more of Rosita in this episode – finally! And it seems very likely that she is more than capable of helping Glenn pick up the pieces. She’s been the voice of reason for Abraham, urging him to spend at least a day in the bookstore. “Maybe we keep having to stop because we never start at 100%?” She’s been his rock, his number two. In public, she supports Abraham, right up until she refuses his suicide run through the walker town. When we actually get to see them interacting, her teasing him about his hair, them making love, her stitching up his hand, they are very sweet together. But at the end of the day, Rosita doesn’t need Abraham to survive. She’s the one to point out where on the fire truck the intake vent for the engine is. No one has to go to her aid to save her when fighting walkers. Does Abraham need a mission or at least someone to protect or can he find a new reason to live?
Clearly, I once again really liked this episode. We have some terrific shots – the parallels of Abraham on his knees, the shot of the message on the ground only revealed when the walkers have been washed away. The music was also extremely well done. Most of the scenes in the bookstore have no background music and the quiet is eerie. The themes of the episode tie back into the previous episode and tie forward into the next one – trust me, they do! What did you think of the episode? Do you think Eugene is still alive? Do you think Abraham will be able to move on from this? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!
