New Girl - Episode 4.07 - Review: "Goldmine"

This week on New Girl, Nick pretends to be gay so that Jess has an easier transition with Ian (guest star Michael Stahl-David). Meanwhile Winston tries to woo the neighbors in the building Michelle and Viv, (returning guest star Alexandra Daddario and Amber Stevens. In the meantime, Winston lays some groundwork with the girls across the way from the loft and Coach grows jealous. Coach thinks Winston is laying too much “friendzone” material down, while Winston thinks he is playing the “long game”, passing his time until they jump his bones. Coach slyly just asks the girls to hang and things he has it in the bag. Concurrently, Schmidt has a conniption when Cece considers having a breast reduction.

Nick easily adopts “Gay Nick” as his persona to help Jess out by pretending to be someone he’s not (complete with backstory), completely different than his inability to lie apparently. Over in the girl’s apartment, Schmidt lays some groundwork himself for Coach and Schmidt by talking up their “beauty” while he is really talking about Cece’s breasts. I thought this was quite funny and a good take on how far guys will go to sleep with someone they find attractive, but haven’t figured out how to say they’re into the girl. The problem was that the girls saw right through it.

Nick finds himself in a predicament when he brings girl home for the night, attributing autumn and layers to finding out what a girl looks like. For a moment, I thought his storyline was going nowhere, but the way they incorporated Schmidt’s depression about Cece into it was unbelievable! The whole “I took a walk last night, I’m sorry, I was worried about you” scene was fantastic even if Nick was outed as straight mere seconds later. That scene was fantastic for both of them. I hated seeing Michelle and Viv play rock, paper, scissors to see who would sleep with Winston, but there had to be some payoff to that scene. All in all, “Goldmine” was a pretty funny episode and almost on par with last week’s outstanding episode. The season started off a little rough, but I think New Girl is finally back on track. Tune in next week at 9 PM for a new episode of New Girl on FOX.

Favorite Quotes:
“Your breast belong to all of us, who are you to decide?” Schmidt

“Getting a girl to have sex with you is improv, Winston…it’s jazz, ya dig? And the words are, oh yeah, girl I’m about skippity bop bop ahh!” Coach

About the Author - Edward Slothus

Edward Slothus is a young professional working in the Washington, D.C. Metro Area. An avid pop-culture, film, and television fan, his favorite shows include LOST, Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, New Girl, Outlander, and (for inexplicable reasons that go against all sanity) The Leftovers.