American Horror Story - Episode 3.13 - The Seven Wonders (Season Finale) - Review : "Balenciagaaaa !"

   Over a week ago, American Horror Story Coven delivered us its finale. First, I’m very sorry for the late review, but it has been a crazy week at work and last weekend, I just became uncle for the first time. Anyways, let’s go back to our beloved witches, they’re funnier than our reality.
    “The Seven Wonders” was a good episode and a conclusion to this season. I must say, I felt a bit disappointed by the second half of the season and of course the finale itself. I expected more, or at least something darker than what actually happened. I’ll express my entire point of vie at the end of the review. Let’s dig into this final episode of Coven !

   As explained at the end of “Go to Hell”, because Fiona was a bad Supreme and did not take the time to find and mentor her successor, Cordelia and Myrtle would make all the girls perform the Seven Wonders until the new Supreme is finally revealed…. About time, right ? I enjoyed the last supper scene. Cordelia' speech was excellent. The Seven Wonders were a rite of passage for the girls, they would become adult.
   The Seven Wonders were fun to watch. Since I’ve heard about them, I really wanted to know what they were. Last episode, we finally put names to them and in “The Seven Wonders”, we actually watched the girls performed them. By the way, the opening with Stevie Nicks singing her “Seven Wonders” song was fun. Totally not the opening I expected from AHS, but still it felt good.
   Telekinesis was not the most important wonder, still it was Myrtle’s favorite, so it was the first to be performed. Of course, all the girls did it, they all used it before, expect for Misty but she soon discovered she could that too !
   Then, Delia and Myrtle moved to concilium, my favorite. Mind control can be very useful and powerful, it also turned out to be quite funny. I like how Queenie and Misty got at each other. Madison acted as a total psycho again, that girl is seriously disturbed. She manipulated FrankenKyle so he would kiss her and lick her shoes… Ewww… She can’t understand he loves Zoe and not her.
   Two wonders done and they were still all in the run for the supremacy. But, descensum came and a tragedy happened. Queenie was the first to get back from Hell, she is getting used to : she did it twice in 24 hours. And her hell was still the same with the fried chicken. Madison seconded her, back from a network musical. Her hell seemed funny, I’d love to watch it…. Zoe finally came back in our reality, leaving her Hell where Kyle broke her heart again and again. That’s quite girly and I’m glad we actually did not watch it. I wished we'd have seen more of the different Hell. I expected Nan, or even Marie or Delphine to show up but no.
   Misty Day couldn’t come back and as her time was running out, Cordelia cried over her body, praying for her to come back. It showed one more time that Cordelia is the only witch who cares about others. Misty Day was trapped in Hell, her Hell, killing a frog over and over. Poor girl, that was so sad. I liked Misty Day a lot, she was naïve but she had a good heart and was a powerful witch. It felt kinda terrible to end her storyline in Hell. She deserved better but The Seven Wonders are dangerous to perform and the story needed something bad to happen. Sorry it had to be you, Misty.... Dust to dust Misty Day

   After Misty Day’s death, that seemed to affect only Cordelia, the girls moved to a new wonder. The competition is still on !
   Transmutation was the funniest wonder to watch. I don’t understand why the girls did not use it more often before, I know I would have. They used transmutation so they could play and run outside. I liked this moment, hearing the girls laughing, running in the sunny garden. It was so bright and happy… Of course, it couldn’t last. Zoe found out soon that transmutation can be dangerous, very dangerous.

   That must hurt….
   Dead Zoe was moved to Cordelia’s greenhouse where Madison and Queenie could perform a fifth wonder : vitalum vitalis. Queenie tried it first, I was so sure she would do it because she just did it to Misty in the last episode but apparently she did not have that power in her. I didn’t understand that very much. And I was so disappointed Queenie wasn't the Supreme. She could have rock as a Supreme....
   Madison showed how bad and cruel she is inside, refusing to bring back Zoe, she preferred using vitalum vitalis on a fly she just killed. Bitch !

   Anyways, it seemed Madison was the Supreme after all. Fiona was right. Cordelia and Myrtle shared their feelings and thoughts about it. As Madison is the Supreme and a terrible one, kinda like Fiona was, maybe it'd be better if the Coven disappeared and all the witches would die. Sure, with Supremes that are only concerned about themselves and witch murderers, their race will extinguish.
   Luckily, Myrtle had a revelation : Cordelia was a potential Supreme too. She was never considered one because of Fiona’s opinion and they never questioned it. I thought that it was a question of generation and age. As Cordelia is older than Madison and the girls, I thought she was not in the race. Guess I was wrong !
   Cordelia performed the first fourth wonders, and she was very good at it and enjoying herself. Ever since she became blind, she revealed herself, showing more powers and self confidence. Madison was pissed, so I enjoyed watching Cordelia proving herself. I loved Sarah Paulson' smile when Cordelia controled Queenie's mind to make her dance. Cordelia got almost trapped in Hell, in which she was trying to get her mother's approval and getting bitchslap for it, something she experienced her whole life.

   As the competition between Madison and Cordelia was on, Myrtle moved to the next wonder : divination. Clearly, one of the hardest wonder. Cordelia nailed it quickly, finding the hidden item belonging to former Supreme Mimi De Longpre. Madison didn’t have that gift, you could read it on her face. She tried everything so she could avoid performing it but Myrtle was firm. Of course, she failed, meaning she was not the Supreme after all. Madison tried to find excuses, accused Myrtle of cheating and threating Cordelia to expose the Coven on TV. I liked Madison acting like a child, she really wanted to be the Supreme and I was so glad she wasn't.
   Madison Montogomery had no other choice but to pack and leave the Coven. But, she received a surprise visit from FrankenKyl in her roome. He was angry at her because she didn’t bring back Zoe, whereas Zoe did everything to bring Madison back when she was dead. They were both resurrected and poor Kyle couldn't understand why Madie would let Zoe died. Madison had her last great line, pretending to love him and crying. It didn't convince me and FrankenKyle either. He coldly strangled Madison on her bed. Apparently, the girl forgot she had so many powers, she just choked and died. Have a good time in Hell Madie !

Cordelia was the only witch in the run for Supreme, and she performed her last wonder : vitalum vitalis ! There was not much suspense, as it was very clear Cordelia was the Supreme after all. So yes, she brought back Zoe to life and suddenly she collapsed. When she woke up, her eyes were back ! Yeah girl, you don’t look that scary anymore ! She is the Supreme and that cured her eyes. Great…
   I liked it when Queenie Myrtle held their hands together. Cordelia is the Supreme, I’m not happy about that choice. She was the perfect candidate, that’s for sure but perfect candidates don’t win… Usually.

   As expected, Cordelia’s reign was very different from Fiona’s. She chose to go on TV to expose herself her Coven, so all the young witches can come to her for protection and education. Instead of ending her race, she wanted to make it bigger and stronger. That was touching and nice. I enjoyed the call back from last season, watching Sarah Paulson on interview à la Lana Banana.
   Cordelia made the right call about her coven, she always was a fair witch. Watching her little girl becoming such a great lady pushed Myrtle to a strong decision. Cordelia wants to rule a fair and loyal Coven, away from Fiona’s manipulations and bad decisions. In Myrtle’s head, that would also mean to burn her because she killed a witch (and she killed her quite coldly, true). I was surprised, as Cordelia. And as Cordelia, I cried a bit too because I didn’t want to see Myrtle go. She already died once at the stakes and now again ! I love you too much Myrtle Snow.
   Her death scene was excellent, as Myrtle ever was. She came in a hot red Balenciaga’s dress, looking so fierce. She knew what was coming and she embraced that moment. Her last words : Balenciaga ! Brilliant. I wish we could have watched her Hell. Congratulation to Frances Conroy, you've been the highlight of the season, you made Myrtle Snow my favorite character from Coven, and a close second from the series (just behind Constance).

   After Cordelia made Queenie and Zoe the new Council, we heard a familiar voice : Fiona’s ! I’ve spent the whole episode wondering when would Fiona would be back… If she actually would be. As soon as Cordelia was revealed, I expected Fiona to show up at any moment and slice her throat. When she appeared in the living room, how shock I was !

   I couldn’t recognize Jessica Lange ! The make-up was absolutely great and of course, she acted like a Goddess.
   I had my difficulties with Fiona and Cordelia’s relationship, but Jessica Lange and Sarah Paulson were brilliant, and they have such a great chemistry. The scene was touching, sad, profound. It was the perfect final talk for Cordelia and her mother, to a former Supreme to the new one. Fiona felt her mortality since she gave birth, that’s why she always hated her daughter. And Cordelia always expected another version of motherhood. Fiona never was a caring and warm mother, as she said her love had its limitations but still she loved her daughter. But Cordelia wanted more from Fiona, so she got disappointed a lot. Clearly, the relationship was doomed.
   Cordelia finally showed some strengths, maybe because she knew she was the Supreme. What she told her mother was very beautiful, they hugged for the first time as Fiona let go all the pain, all the fears and died in her daughter’s arm.
   Her death was simple and soft. I kinda expected something more twisted. Last year, Jessica Lange’s character died peacefully in her bed so it would have been nice to have Jessica Lange acted death in another circumstances. She can play human death, I wish her death would have been more supernatural.
   After dying, and despite having no soul, Fiona ended up in Hell.... She is bound to spend eternity with the Axeman. I was disappointed by that. I mean, okay that's the right Hell for Fiona but still.... It felt kinda flat.
   Cordelia being finally free from her mother, embraced her Supreme status and welcomed many, many girls in her Coven. She will protect them, teach them and make the witches stronger. It’s a new era for witches, people know about them…. Everyone’s happy !

   Well, I’m not happy about this conclusion. I must say, I feel like since episode 6, the series has gone downhill. There were many problems with this season.
   First, and mostly, there was no evolution for the characters. In the past seasons, where the characters started and where they ended were so different, it really showed that during the 13 episode, they had grown, they changed and that was interesting. The transformation and the characters' journey were the important stuffs, what really mattered. In Coven, only Cordelia evolved…. And stil, it wasn’t a big change. Otherwise, every character stayed the same from the beginning to the end.
   Many storylines felt useless, like FrankenKyle or Luke’s. It was interesting first, their characters could have lead to something great but no, it was always the same and they turned useless at the end. Luke died, and Kyle became the new Spading. Okay, that took a whole season to get there...
   Secondly, there was not much horror. I enjoyed the zombies, it was fun but since then there wasn’t horror. Okay, we saw head, bloody massacre but still, nothing very frightening or disgusting. AHS has a tradition for depicting horror but this year it was really missing. The writers could have gone much farther with the witches’ storylines, but it felt like we were in a loop, like their Hells. The girls came, they died, they came back, they tried to kill each other, than they were working against a common enemy only to fight each other the next day.
   I missed a Big Bad this season. There were no scary and manipulative ghosts, no Devil, no aliens, no nazi doctor… Only a minotaur who raped Queenie (or not ?) and then got his head cut off and the Axeman, who was Fiona’s pet and died the same way twice. Witch hunters were stupid, humans and weak. Only Papa Legba would been a great enemy for the witches, but he appeared like 3 minutes in the whole season. Delphine would have made a great vilain but Kathy Bates gave so much humanity to her that I could only feel pity for her, even when she was torturing someone.
   I really hope Ryan Murphy and his team will improve next season. I understood they wanted something lighter from Asylum, I like the humor in Coven, but it doesn’t mean we have to watch happy endings ! It’s a horror show for God shake ! Since when do you finish a horror show on a happy ending ??

Spells notes :

• Madison was a cold bitch ! I’m glad she ended up one of Spading’s dolls !
• Queenie is not the Supreme ! I was VERY disappointed, but at least she got to live.
• Which witch will you miss most ? Misty or Madie ?
• So DaVinci  was a Warlock. Interesting !
• What's your favorite hell ? Madison's seemed the funnier !
• Cordelia was the Supreme, you guys were right.... At least 30% of you who voted.

   What did you think of “The Seven Wonders” ? And about Coven ? Which season is your favorite ?

   Did you catch any clues on where the new season will take place ?

   Hit the comments !

About the Author - Romain Ossust

I'm 27 from France, living near Paris. I love a lot of TV shows, I can not name them all but here the ones that came to my mind : Orphan Black, True Blood, Dexter, Weeds, Person of Interest, Criminal Minds, 24, Ab Fab, Carnivale, Lost, The Americans, American Horror Story, Once Upon A Time, Desperate Housewives, Glee, Ugly Betty, Scandal, The Walking Dead, Raising Hope, Orange is the New Black, Grey’s Anatomy .... Otherwise, I’m also very fond of cats, I own 5 of them. I work as an administrative assistant, in one of the greatest place to work in France. I also enjoy sunbathing, reading and having fun ! I hate doing sports !