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Buffy Season 8 Recap - Swell

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Satsu stands atop a turned over jeep, the man inside is shouting in Japanese but Satsu doesn’t understand him “whats he yelling?” she asks one of the other Slayers, “Big monster!” he is yelling at them. Satsu gets a message on her headset that the monster has been spotted, as their leader Satsu tells them to steer it away from the masses and towards the bridge. She finally catches up with the creature as it climbs a bridge, there is focus on the fact that he is carrying a bag. Satsu uses her samurai sword to remove the arm that is carrying the bag but it quickly fights back and knocks Satsu down with its tail, as it comes towards her it is electrocuted by a gun, Satsu looks up to see Kennedy arriving by parachute with a stun gun. Satsu becomes instantly annoyed, assuming Kennedy has been sent by Buffy to check on her, Kennedy reminds Satsu that she has recently been promoted and it is normal to have some sort of performance review. Satsu then points out that she is more annoyed that Buffy sent “the other lesbian” but Kennedy insists that she requested to be the one sent to visit Satsu, mainly to help her through her ‘stuff’ with Buffy, Kennedy tells her supportively that Satsu isn’t the first lesbian to be used by a straight girl for a ‘thrill’ but Satsu insists it was true love. Satsu puts on her lip gloss (the same one she was wearing when she awoke Buffy with a kiss) and Kennedy tells her that maybe its time to try some different flavours and to find a girl who can give Satsu her heart just as much as her body. Satsu tells her that she likes her cinnamon lip gloss and is sticking with it, Kennedy realises that Satsu’s cinnamon lip gloss is symbolic to her and she will not be giving it up, or the desire for Buffy, anytime soon. Kennedy tells Satsu that it’s the end of the intervention and that she did come to Tokyo for a performance review, so, she asks, “whats in the monster's bag?” Satsu picks it up and they peer inside.


Back at the Tokyo head quarters the Slayers are questioning the contents of the bag, it is a plush toy, a fluffy vampire cat. Satsu and Kennedy discuss the ridiculous vampire culture that is growing, Kennedy points out that since Harmony has had her own reality television show the vampire community have been a source of public curiousity and entertainment. While they can appreciate the novelty of the toy, they wonder what is so important about it that a huge demon wanted it. The reader then sees the demon return to his headquarters, he tells his master that the Slayer took the bait, the plush toy is nothing more than a Trojan horse which Satsu has taken back to the Slayer base. The demon is rewarded for his success with a quick painless death.

It is now the middle of the night at the Tokyo Slayer headquarters and the Slayers are asleep. The vampire toy suddenly comes to life and finds its way through the building towards a certain room. It enters the room and it is revealed that Satsu is the target, it climbs onto her bed and puts on its ‘vampire face’, a sleeping Satsu has no way to defend herself. The next morning Kennedy walks into the kitchen to find Satsu wearing a piece of clothing that she has never seen her wear before, Satsu explains that it is a “furisode”, girls wear them to show that they are single and available for marriage, her parents bought her it but she decided to go the gay route. Satsu now explains that she is over the whole “kissing girls” phase, girls are meant to marry boys and have their babies. Kennedy walks over with concern for Satsu, she tells her that maybe they should find their ‘resident’ witch but before Kennedy can continue Satsu hits her to the floor calling her a “damn dirty Slayer!”. Satsu yells at Kennedy, telling her that the whole Slayer organisation is sick and wrong, they are girls, they shouldn’t be fighting they should be looking after men. Kennedy gets up and hits Satsu in the face, Satsu’s eyes turn black/red (like the vampire cats) and asks Kennedy if she can hit stronger than that, Kennedy proceeds by kneeing her in the gut. Satsu falls to the floor and throws up green mucus which includes the vampire cat which has clearly been possessing her from inside (ew). It immediately attacks Kennedy but Satsu slices it in half with her sword before it can inflict any damage.

The Slayers take a trip to the company that produces the “vampy cat” and hack their computers to find out where else these vampy cats have been sent to. They find out that most of the vampy cats have been sent on a ship towards Scotland, Kennedy realises that is why it possessed Satsu, to find out the location of Buffy and the location of the Slayer homebase. They fly out to find the ship and sneak onboard, Satsu and Kennedy place explosives on board the ship and Satsu claims that if it doesn’t work they can just try plan B, Kennedy asks what plan B is but before she can answer, a man clearly possessed by a vampy cat tells them both that they will die. Kennedy kicks his legs but rather than making him fall down, he disintegrates having been eaten from within by the vampy cat. The vampy cat jumps from the body and tells its ‘brothers’ to attack, many more vampy cats emerge from possessed men on the ship. Kennedy and Satsu manage to kill many of the vampy cats but as their numbers slightly decrease, a dying toy tells them that each individual death is meaningless because they cannoy defeat ‘the swell’, they toys merge together to form a giant vampy cat which praises the death of Slayers and the rise of Twilight. Satsu lights a flare and the giant vampy cat laughs at the weapon, Satsu throws it into the air while Kennedy asks what she is doing. Satsu tackles Kennedy overboard as we see the other Slayers in a submarine use the flare to locate the ship, they send two missles towards the ship and the ship explodes as Satsu and Kennedy fall to safety. Satsu finally answers Kennedy question “That was plan B“. Satsu explains that they stole the submarine from a group of vampires a few months back but that she wanted to play with it before informing buffy of their new acquisition. Kennedy laughs and tells her that she is definitely going to pass her evaluation.

They Tokyo Slayers are now in a conference call with Buffy and Xander, Buffy confirms that all other shipments of the Vampy Cats have been destroyed, as has the building that made them. However, they now have another problem that has spawned from this battle. Buffy then plays a television clip to the Tokyo Slayers, Harmony is on a talk show “Harmony Kendall, Vampire Rights Spokesperson” it has on the screen. She is shocked that the Slayers hate vampires so much that they are now killing sweet cuddly toys just because they have fake fangs on. Satsu reacts with anger, asking Buffy why they havnt killed her yet but Buffy tells her that they do not need a martyr for the vampire movement. Everyone already thinks they are the “bad guys”, the best thing they can do is keep a low profile for the time being. Buffy explains that Slayers are now more hated than vampires, to get through this they need to start acting more human otherwise the vampires are going to win. They all need to stop “being what they’ve been and focus on being more human”, as the call ends Kennedy puts her hand on Satsu’s shoulder and asks if she was expecting more affection from Buffy’s call, Satsu rummages through her bag and asks Kennedy if she wants to go shopping. “What for?” “it’s time to stop being who we are and try a new flavour” she responds as she throws the cinnamon lip gloss into the bin, Satsu is over Buffy.

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