Previously: Dean worried, Lisa was awesome, Dean vamped and killed, Sam smiled (yep, still as creepy as last week), Ben got pushed, Dean drank and vomited Kool-Aid, and Dean knew Sam lied.
At Big Gerson's Home of Terrible Ties, Plain Jane, or Average Pathetic Girl (APG), emos into her phone. She whines for truth and the previews show that doesn't end well. People give her the unvarnished truth. Titanic's Old Rose killed a homeless man and freaky girl needs a psychiatrist stat. Pretty specific fantasy kid. Apparently Big Gerson gives the key to the gun drawer to anyone so after her sister tells her to kill herself, she does. (Side note - until the sister went to name calling and said to kill herself I was fine with the tough love. I am so glad no one hit me with a truth spell.) APG blows her brains out and Gerson needs to change his slogan, or at least the sign.
Dean and Bobby discuss the Sam-Thing. Dean cries Lucifer, but Jim Beaver, after guesting on Law & Order: LA goes into full lawyer mode. Monsters have rights too and Dean needs watch and collect evidence, not just shoot. Dean tries to protect the precious Impala from monster cooties, but Bobby says get over it. Sam-Thing gives Dean a hotdog and they do the liars dance. Hey, that concerned face looks almost right, Sam-Thing. Maybe a few more hours practicing it in the mirror. The brothers have a case. No-Call Lisa makes me sad.
At APG's cat shrine, Sad Sister wonders why the FBI are involved. Sam-Thing: "Well, it's um, a new, more caring administration." I chuckle and sigh at the irony. Please come back Sam. Sad Sister joins the liars dance but Sam-Thing nails her on it. Dean and Sam-Thing do some eye talking. You can see the connection that has always been there, but instead of being about Sister, it's about how Sam questions her. It's cool and creepy, but not half so much as the Sam-Thing smile when the woman cries. Watch that scene again. Fantastic acting from both! With no supernatural markings, the brothers head to the car. Sam-Thing with purpose, Dean with suspicion.
And we are at the dentist. I grab my pillow in anticipation of the gore to come. The tools have me flashing back to the Alastair torture fest. Dr. Paul calms down his patient friend and I wonder why the news is on when all that does is depress people. (For the record - I had no idea what was going on at this point.) How about ocean scenes, Paul? The close-up shot makes me queasy. The patient ticks me off and although I know he's under the truth spell I have no sympathy. Novocain please kick in and shut him up! Whoah! Didn't expect pedophilia . There are no words. Ick, sqwick. You deserve what you got.
Commercial break - Jessica Biel, I will not buy Just Bitten lipstick. Let's behead the vampire craze!
Bobby has no answers. (Hope you at least got breakfast.) Dean, honey, I love you but remember what happened the last time you were ungrateful. You're not 16 anymore. Watch that tone before Bobby tears you a new one. Dean worst cases, "Satan is my co-pilot" but Bobby trumps with "Maybe it's just Sam." Dean can't handle that truth and neither can I. The Sam-Thing cannot be Sam. It just can't. Bobby has one day and then Dean will "handle" it. Time for a miracle Bobby because I can't "handle" Dean-guilt if he harms Sam. Dean calls Lisa but telling her what happened is another truth Dean can't handle. Remember when you told Ben to "man up." Take your own advice.
Sam-Thing is way too happy about drilling and Dean is way too happy about research. Sam-Thing does baffled well. Dean used to be a better liar, but he's contemplating fratricide so gets a pass. Dr. Paul hung himself. Sam-Thing chats up Dean, who is researching Sam not suicides, and they stay split up. "So Root Canal and Russian Roulette. Both of them, it's like they were cursed. I mean people just compelled to puke the truth all over them." At Root Canal's office, Dean makes the connection and heads to the music shop both victims frequented. Dean gets nada and tries to leave, but the shop owner says his museum piece horn was stolen the same day APG died. We've got a winner! Dean thinks missing heaven weapons. "Castiel, hello. Possible loose nuke down here. Angelic weapon. Kind of your department. You hear that Cas." I'm fond of Dean's praying. And sound Gabriel's stolen horn, Cas is back. Many didn't like Dean's smackdown of Cas, but I think he deserved it. Cas used them to fix heaven's mistakes, yet won't help with Sam-Thing. I call foul! This is as deserved as Bobby's lecture in episode 4.
"Well that's great because for all we know he's just gift wrap for Lucifer." And another theory bites the dust. Lucifer isn't driving Sam-Thing or Cas would feel it. Dean calls Cas on his own Cas-Thing impression and Cas excuses, "I'm at war. Certain regrettable things are now required of me." Great! More questions, no answers yet. I don't like this trend. Cas does his "Around the Town in 2 Seconds" routine, but it's not the horn. If I hadn't seen the previews, I would be shocked. Nice twist. Dean dismisses Cas coldly, but Cas vows to inquire about Sam-Thing. Too little, too late buddy. If you can scour the town in 2 seconds, you could take 2 minutes to check Sam-Thing out.
Sam-Thing checks out the morgue and learns the bodies are missing. Dean checks out the local bar. Dean should get a doctor to check out his liver too with all the drinking he's doing. Well what do you know? It's the same newscaster, and I'm finally on the board. Sam-Thing calls; APG was not the first. Sam-Thing wants Dean to join him at first girl's place. Dean needs another drink. Bartender: "I thought you were working." Dean: "I'm working up to it." Bartender gives him a drink on the house and asks Dean if he needs anything else. Dean responds, "I'd just like the freaking truth." (Apparently, the cameraman is a Jensen Ackles fan. Last week we got the eye close-up. Today we zoom in on his lips and then several face close-ups.)
Anyone surprised the bartender bares her oxy-loving soul. Anyone…? Didn't think so. Humor is back. I've missed you. Boob job: "I'm sitting like this so you will look at my breasts. I just bought them. I need a lot of attention." Dean: "Good luck with that." Dean bemusedly walks away. Um, Dean, that was Fun. You remember Fun? And ….he's back. Dean ogles Boob Job, raising her self-esteem, but doesn't cheat on Lisa. Fence walking works for me. Checking out his new theory, he calls Bobby. Tori and Dean…really Bobby? I'm disappointed. At least it wasn't Jersey Shore. Bwah! Bobby gets his toes done. Hilarious, but Dean's "scarred for life." It's like finding things about your parents' sex life. Just no. "I've never told anyone that. Why am I telling you? Maybe because you're my favorite." Dean is so proud, except Sam-Thing is a better hunter now. Dean tells Bobby he's cursed. Bobby: "How is it that half the time you clean a mess, you end up dirty?" That's not the question Bobby. How come 90% of the time Dean gets Djinn-jacked, knocked out, vamped, cursed, kidnapped by (oops…no spoilers here), etc.? It's like in order to prove Sam-Thing is a superior hunter they've turned Dean into a novice. It's just as tedious as the Bad Sam plot. MOVE ON!!! Anyway, Dean glass-half-fulls the truth curse. Bobby disagrees: "Dean, what damn fool move are you about to.." Dean cuts him short but not short enough. Bobby I really don't want to know about your first girlfriend. Please. (Jensen Ackles and Jim Beaver are awesome in this scene like normal.)
Cat-girl #2 (Corey) committed suicide and her roommate's not shocked. Always a bad sign. Sam-Thing almost fools me when he hands the roommate tissues and does a fair facsimile of Sam's empathy face. While Sam-Thing checks out Corey's room, Dean gets the inevitable call from Lisa. I wish this curse thing worked backward so Dean would tell Lisa the truth. Probably should have let this one go to voicemail and deal with Lisa's wrath afterwards. I like Lisa, but the sad violins are playing on this relationship already. Dean wants to "do this later", but Lisa goes straight to the heart, "You shoved my kid Dean. How about we talk about this now?" Yep, I still love her. Dean can't explain. How hard is it to say I was turned into a vampire, but now I'm better? MAN UP DEAN!!! Lisa is the only woman on the planet who will believe you. Lisa: "You want to know the truth?" Dean: "Probably not." Lisa thinks Dean freaked and she blames Sam for the demise of their relationship. Partly true, partly the mute's fault. "You guys have the most unhealthy, tangled up, crazy thing that I've ever seen and as long as he's in your life, you are never going to be happy." In season 1 and 2, this would have been blasphemy. Now, she's right. They are toxic for each other, and yet together they save the world. I love the brother relationship more than anything, but they have to deal with their issues soon. After Dean and Company get rid of Sam-Thing and find Sam that is. Lisa apologizes for sounding harsh and Dean tells her it isn't her fault. And I am tearing up because I hurt for all 3 of them. Hey wait a minute! Dean told her he brought Sam back from the dead in season 2 but he can't say vampires? What the heck! Now I'm just annoyed. Dean: "I'm not going to lie. OK, me and Sam, we..we've got issues. No doubt. But you and Ben…" Lisa: "Me and Ben can't be in this thing with you. Sorry." And my heart breaks. This sucks! I understand Lisa needs to protect her son. I understand Dean needs to find/fix Sam. I hate that they cannot be together.
And suddenly we are back to Sam-Thing. For the first time, I wish for a commercial break. Even those annoying Old Navy dummies would do. I can't believe I'm supposed to care about Corey's wacky right now. Oh great! Apparently Mittens didn't run away. When relationship obsession leads to boiled bunnies or skinned cats, take a break. Poor Mittens. If I weren't already drained by Lisa and Dean, all my sympathy would go to you. Dean meets Sam-Thing on the stairway and demands the truth. Having a conversation about your brother letting you be turned into a vampire in an apartment building is not a good plan, but Dean isn't playing anymore and Sam-Thing realizes he's been cursed. Sam-Thing says that he froze in horror. And once again, is anyone buying this story? Anyone?….I thought not. "I can't lie here." Yeah right. I'm disappointed Dean is buying this because there's that smirk right when he says he can't lie. Argh! I'm really disliking Sam-Thing after the break-up. His look after saying he has Dean's back, absolutely chilling. Kill the Sam-Thing, Dean and find your brother.
Dean examines Corey's cat's skull and determines she was crazy. Sam determines she was summoning Veritas, the goddess of truth. Veritas "slams" you with truth until you kill yourself and then takes your body as a snack. Nice. Apparently Veritas hates dogs and is "an attention whore", leading Dean to guess newscaster. Dean pays off a security guard to get old news tapes, and they watch all night while Dean eats a lot. Sam finds a tape with dogs and Dean notices her creepy eyes. They tail her home. Her house "looks pretty normal " but Dean's "sure inside it's chock full of creep." Well fabulous! Now Sam-Thing is killing puppies. I want answers RIGHT NOW! This episode is about truth but we haven't been getting it. There's 10 minutes left. You are running out of time, Sera.
Sam asks where the "creep" is but the pink lighting is creepy enough without having a cat lead you around. Hey Veritas, self-absorbed much! I'm pretty sure it's considered arrogant to have a shrine to yourself. And YUCK! Apparently the missing bodies are kitty kibble. That's just nasty! Vertias knocks the Winchesters out and they wake up under a half eaten torso. She's a pretty goddess but skip dinner; she's partial to uncooked tongue. Veritas calls the brothers out for being liars and plays truth with Dean while Sam-Thing plays with a knife. I guess it's good Sam-Thing lied to Dean earlier because Dean can truthfully say he feels better about Sam. "As of yesterday, I wanted to kill him in his sleep. I thought he was a monster." Congrats Sam-Thing. That look of surprise is the first emotion I believe on your lying face. Apparently Dean thinks Sam-Thing is channeling his inner Dean. Correct me if I'm wrong, but you have never left Sam to turn into a monster, unless you were the monster. I don't think this theory flies. Dean continues to explain the evils of hunting and how he wanted out. "But what I'm good at is slicing throats. I ain't a father. I'm a killer and there's no changing that. I know that now." Nope. No more Dean guilt. Figure it out, fix it, and fight for it. You're a Winchester after all. You don't accept defeat.
Veritas throws in a Natural Born Killers reference and it's Sam-Thing's turn. Sorry Sam-Thing, but Veritas has a bull-meter and she knows you're lying. Veritas: "You're not human." Dean: "What?" Veritas: "You didn't know that. Now that I believe." Sam-Thing breaks free and tosses Dean the knife. Veritas chokes Sam (nice consistency) but Dean distracts her by stabbing her (nice cat face) so Sam-Thing plunges the dog-blood knife into her. Not complaining, but she seemed easier to take down than other gods. Anyway, score one for Veritas because she gave us a kind-of answer, maybe. Still not enough.
Dean pulls a knife on Sam and Sam tries playing the honesty card. "Why the hell should I believe anything you say?" Good question because I don't. Demons lie. Monsters lie. Whatever Sam-Thing is lies. Sam-Thing admits he let Dean get turned to get into the nest. (Did he want in the nest to kill vamps or did he have another purpose?) He knew Dean could handle vamping, but apparently not the truth. Dean could have died or killed Ben. Sam-Thing: "That should stop me cold but it…I just don't feel it." OK. Kid torture, kid dying, and you don't feel it. Yep, you're a monster. I don't care how good of a hunter you are right now. Captain Obvious thinks he needs help. I know people disagree, but I don’t believe Sam-Thing. I think he is still playing Dean, telling him what he wants to hear to get out of the situation. I don't buy that he has feelings now but doesn't have them most of the time. It's the role of the sociopath to say whatever is needed to get what they want. Right now Sam-Thing wants to get out alive and he obviously knows Dean well.
Dean, reeling, turns his back on Sam-Thing and puts down the knife. Probably a bad move, Dean. He could be anything and he admits he's not the Sam you know. Sam-Thing is relieved; Dean's lost in thought. Okay, lost in thought might not be the right emotion. Dean punches the snot out of Sam-Thing and he's unconscious. My original thought was, "Smart move. Now tie him up before he awakens and get Cas to zap you somewhere to figure out what's wrong." After all, Sam still has advanced hunter skills and if he is a monster, you need to take care of the situation. Can't do that if he is awake, as he proved with Veritas. However, popular consensus seems to be that Dean was taking out his rage on Sam-Thing and I can see that too. He had a lot to be angry about, especially since Sam-Thing didn't care that Dean could have killed Ben. Guess we have to wait until next week because that was the end. WHAT!!! Where is the truth? We've got more questions than answers. I really hate getting strung along!
Next week - Spoke too soon since now Sam-Thing is soulless. And we've got a theory winner. Congrats to everyone who voted Soul Jacked Up. However, I'm still skeptical because it raises far more questions than answers. Including, why didn't Cas know sooner since in the third episode they found out someone was stealing souls? It would seem prudent to keep an eye out for that and Sam-Thing was standing right next to him. Guess we have to wait until next week.
Screencaps by Kaidi at
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