(Not what the show is) Cougar Town – Episode 2.04 – The Damage You've done – Recap

Hello and welcome to the Cougar Town circus. Where iguanas stare at you, and poop in your pockets. Where strange guys swallow swords for no reasons. Where Jules and Grayson run into Jules' ex lover and Grayson is totally fine with it, and where Jules finds out that Grayson and Laurie had sex before they got together, and she is perfectly okay with it. At first.

Maybe we are getting there too fast. Let's starts over. Jules and Grayson are walking together in what seems like a strange town fair (Do fairs pop up for no reason everywhere?), and they run into a street hockey friend of Grayson's (though Grayson couldn't skate even if his life depended on it). As it turns out, Jules knows him too. She tries to get away from it by saying there are thousands of ways for people to know each other, which is clearly something someone only says when they have sex with that other person. Grayson, though, is fine with these news and with whomever Jules' has slept with before they got together. However the incident reminds him that he too, slept with someone that may stir trouble in the future – Laurie, and decides its best to tell her and get it over with.

So Jules won't be too mad at either of them, Grayson and Laurie both take a run for it, and each tries to tell her first. Eventually, they tell her both at the same time, but at the worst time possible just when Jules' is taking her driver license photo for the 1000th (okay, 10th) time. This is after 20 years that she has been trying to hold on to her youth, and keep her old photo. This turns out bad. Jules looks like she has seen her neighbor Tom, naked (or a man swallowing a sword, if you prefer). Apart from the screwed up drivers license picture, Jules is not mad at either of them at first. But she really wants to be. So she gets her evil twin, Ellie, to give her reasons to be mad at them both. As there is nothing Ellie loves more in the world than to make people suffer, she gladly helps and tells Jules that she should be mad at Grayson and Laurie because they were scheming behind her back, planning to tell her at the exact moment she'd be less mad at them both.
This gets Jules going, but she still has to choose just one to be mad at, but when she gets down to it, she figures Grayson did it before they were together so that's okay, and Laurie did it when she didn't know that Jules had the hots for Grayson, so she's okay too. The only person left is Ellie, who is enjoying every moment of the Jules' Surviver game. This is until Jules realizes Ellie knew about the whole thing too, and didn't tell her. Ellie is forced to hand over her wine, and leave the house while she has to watch from her window how Andy gets his fingernails painted in the not very flattering orange, and hear Jules' plans for the evening which contains every thing Ellie loves. Things get even dirtier when Ellie calls Andy home, and Jules in returns closes the blinds.

Meanwhile, Travis is a smug – annoying college boy. When he left for college, he told his girlfriend, Kylie, that they should see other people. Only, he didn't expect Kylie to be making out with nipple-twisting vampires. Which she has, while he wasn't getting any at college. As he comes crawling back to Kylie (not knowing this is what he is doing), and after ignoring Andy's advice time after time, he understands that he doesn't want Kylie to see other people anymore, but by then, he finally understand that he is actually under Kylie's control.

As for Laurie, her lipstick seems to get brighter and brighter every week. Makes one wonder if the lights in Cougar Town are going to turn purple any time soon. Anyway, so Laurie is in love with Smith. She is so in love with him, that she will keep his baby. So in love that she breathes his name. But as it turns out, Smith isn't as much in love. He finally understands that after months they have been seeing each other, when he finds out that Laurie had slept with Grayson and he could be more interested in Andy's fingernails (they are orange, after all) than in that.

Back in the mad house, Laurie comes clean to Jules that she did in fact know that Jules had a thing for Grayson when she slept with him. Jules gets upset, and tells Laurie to leave her house. Only Laurie decides to stay until Jules is ready to talk to her. No matter how long it takes. Jules, however, doesn't want to talk to Laurie and she goes upstairs to play the drums as if they were Laurie. Grayson, the voice of reason, comes to the rescue once more (he seems to be doing that a lot lately). As he climbs up the stares (looking manly, wearing his roller blades), he tells Jules that she won't be able to ditch Laurie, because thats not who she is. Jules asks Ellie to tell her the harsh truth, and tell her if she could or couldn't dump Laurie. Ellie is very sad to say it, but admits Jules won't be able to dump her, because she loves her. Jules is determined to show them all that she is not someone they can all walk over, by ripping out Travis' favorite poster. And then wanting to throw up from the guilt. As Jules heads down stairs to prove to everyone she can be a bad ass, she sees Laurie heartbroken after Smith broke up with her, and comforts her regardless of everything that happened in the twenty minutes prior to it.

This makes one wonder if the world wouldn't have been better (and impossibly more insane) if there would have been more people like Jules Kiki Cobb in it.