Hello all! Sorry about the week hiatus but I was on vacation. First up here is a recap of Sunday's True Blood. Expect a recap of episode 5 sometime tomorrow. Here we go!:
The episode starts off with Sookie being taken into Russell's mansion in slow motion. Bill pleads for Sam to get her out of there, but when he refuses to Bill stakes one of Russell's vampire guards and attempts to stake Russell, but to no avail. He is 3000 years old and very strong. Russell orders Lorena to take Bill to the slave quarters and kill him and Eric gives Sookie to the king, telling him that he doesn't know what she is, but she is valuable. Oh Eric, you goofball!
Next we cut to Merlottes where Arlene is dealing with an especially tough customer who is asking an awful lot of questions about their peas. Arlene gives the order to the flirting, pool playing Lafayette and when he complains about it Jesus offers his help. Lafayette asks him if he can even cook, to which he replies, "I can do a lot of things." Oh boy this is getting spicy! While complaining Arlene happens to cut her finger and shows it to Jessica, who involuntarily bares her fangs at Arlene. Arlene gasps and tells her not to eat her because she is pregnant. She shows her clear lack of knowledge about vampires when she says that the pregnancy probably makes her want to eat her even more and finishes off with a nice little "this is why people hate y’all", to which Jessica simply states it is only because she hasn't eaten in days.
Crystal and Jason are still at it by the pond and Jason makes a very curious remark about how he loves how warm she is. Does this mean that she is a werewolf too? Those hotshot people don't seem very normal so I would say it is very likely. If you have read any of the books you know something about Crystal but I wont spoil it! After lots and lots of kissing and smiling on both their parts Jason actually opens up and tells her that he is afraid she is going to break her heart. Has Jason finally found someone that he is actually compatible with? Perhaps, but before she can answer him she smells something (another werewolf?) and tells him that she has to leave/ that she is too dangerous for him and he ought to forget her. Obviously this doesn't sit well with Jason and he is going to do whatever it takes to keep Crystal.
Next Eric takes Sookie into the living room/creepy civil war fireplace room and reinforces that he never cared for her and has no intention of helping her escape. The King has something that he has wanted since he was a human and nothing is going to get in the way of it, especially not her. It looks like Eric's sudden allegiance to the king is really part of a Sawyer-esque long con. Yay True Blood-Lost cross over! Sookie tells Eric that she hates his guts and she will pay him back for what he is doing. Oh Sookie (cue snoop dogg music video). Russell comes in and wants to know what exactly Sookie is. She obviously is not human judging by the whole light hand incident but he is not exactly sure what that makes her. Russell also does a good job of being the big bad by dropping the ole' Bill-was-spying-on-you-and-that's-why-he-was-in-Bon Temps-in-the-first-place bomb on Sookie who seems genuinely shocked by the large amount of family info that he has on her. Sookie tells the King she will tell him all about her, so long as he answers some of her questions too (Most of which have to do with vampire politics). Russell squeezes out of Sookie that she is a telepath, she doesn't know why she gets light hands, and once she moved a chain with her mind. Russell seems pleased...for the moment.
Back at Merlottes Arlene continues with her vampire prejudices and Jessica manages to win back her trust by not only glamouring the customer into leaving, but leaving the entire contents of her wallet as a tip. Score one for Jessica! The woman excuses herself to the bathroom where Jessica then proceeds to feed on her. Om nom nom nom.
Still on their date, Lafayette and Jesus sit in his nice car and talk about Bon Temps. Jesus asks him why he doesn't just leave and Lafayette tells him that he has left before but he needs Bon Temps and Bon Temps needs him. Jesus gives Lafayette and the viewers a little bit of his background when he tells him that he is the child of a rape and he and his mother constantly moved around when he was a kid. Lafayette says that he feels like he can finally trust him (aww) and they move back inside to look at mother Mary. This is unfortunately interrupted by the local idiots of Hotshot who are once again beating Lafayette's care with a baseball bat. He can't just have one good thing! Lafaysus (their couple name, although Jesayette is another contender) lay the smack down on them and in the process it is revealed to Jesus that Lafayette deals V. Jesus is not happy about this and asks to be taken home. Cue the wa wa wawawa waaa
In the slave quarters Lorena has begun her torturing of Bill. She starts to play an old record and talks about how much she misses the 1930s. Everyone did what they were supposed to do. It's a very creepy talk. She talks about how much she has suffered and Bill snaps back that she has not been the recipient of suffering in a long time. O snap! She starts torturing him and I wont go into the details but it is pretty gruesome. At one point she even says that in the end he will die with her, not Sookie, inside of him. GROSS.
In the honeymoon suite of Tara and Franklin it looks like things are gonna get physical. Tara surprises everyone by asking him if she can bite him. He obliges and we are treated to a really gross shot of her ripping off his flesh from his neck area. Oh and also he lets her know that Sookie is in the mansion. Time to escape after v-fueled sex!
A series of nice little quick scenes follow:
Eric and Russell are both in the car, chatting about life, when the king reveals that they are not going to see the magister but are instead going to see the queen!
-Sookie is thrown into her room and Tara talks to her via mind and tells her that they are going to escape in the morning.
Russell tells Eric that Hitler was right about a master race, but the master race wasn’t the Aryans, it was the supernatural beings. If all of them just teamed up they could take the people down in a few days.... Eric agrees whole heartily with the king and says he too remembers what the earth used to look like. In fact, he remembers everything, especially the vikings.....
The duo now arrive at the Queen's palace and we see that the Queen is now using lottery to get money. Man times really are tough. Russell essentially asks for her hand in marriage for the 30th time and then forces her into marriage. Eric helps him by holding her down forcefully and tells her that he could kill her right now if he wanted to. He is older than her and was only holding back because he was in servitude to her, renounces servitude to her and pledges allegiance to Russell.
We cut back to Lorena still torturing bill. Yikes. She is crazy. Brings Cooter and Debbie in to feed on him before she finishes him off. Bill says that he welcomes death, hates that she made him a vampire.
Back at Sam's house we see on the tv vampire spokeswoman Nan Flanagan talking about vampire rights act, coming to ratification soon. Foreshadowing much? Sam wants to know about Tommy’s father. Tommy tells him he will tell him when he is comfortable and then right at that moment his parents come to pick him up. Sam awkwardly leaves for Merlottes and when he is gone Tommy's mother reminds him that Sam might be his brother by blood, but she is his family and he needs to support him. Over at Merlottes Sam hears from Arlene about the parents leading away a pitbull in a car and Sam finally figures out what Joe Lee is using Tommy for, dog fighting. Joe lee is a regular Michael Vick and is using Tommy in the dog fighting circuit to make them money. luckily Andy comes in and Sam talks to the sheriff about where dog fighting happens in their area. He doesn't want to say at first but after Sam reminds him of how he saved his life he tells him that he has heard about raids in union parish and same hops in his car and heads over there to investigate.
We cut back to Tara who walks over to the wall of weapons behind her and proceeds to bash in Franklin's head with a mace and then runs out. She gets all disguised up and tricks Sookie's guard were into letting her in, and then Sookie and her proceed to knock him out. Tara heads towards the door to escape but Sookie wants to go to the slave quarters and find Bill. Tara tells her she is stupid and both head off in different directions.
We come back to Jason who has suited himself up in his varsity jacket and brought flowers to Crystal's door. Unfortunately when she opens the door she pretends to not know him and we find out that she is engaged to the same hotshot idiot that tried to gaybash Lafayette. Rut Roh! In a fit of anger Jason drives over to Merlottes for a cold one but in doing so stumbles upon his favorite high school QB having sex with his girlfriend in the parking lot. Jason breaks up the lil' naked dance they are doing in her car and threatens to break his throwing hand, showing his dominance over the lil' jerk. Way to go Jason Stackhouse!
The episode ends with Tara still running away, when all of the sudden she runs into a red eyed white wolf. Oh shit! Luckily it turns out to be Alcide who is just looking for Sookie and Tara asks him the 500 dollar question, Do you have a car? Yes he does! Thank goodness that means we can finally get out of this place. Well not so fast, just as Sookie finds Bill bloody and chained up Lorena comes in and starts attacking Sookie, eventually biting her neck to try and kill her. Oh no! Alcide you better stop this madness next episode, or else!
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